Can I just punch her in the face?

softballbabe1515

So I was out to dinner with my fiance, his parents, his brother and his wife and a few other friends.  We were all having a drink and eating and just having a good time. Now my fiance's brother is married to this girl that apparently doesn't like me and I have never done anything to her that would cause her to hate me.  Well my fiance and I joke around and say ya know we only have four months left we can still back out and just silly stuff like that.  Obviously we aren't going to back out, we love each other we have a wonderful home together and we have really built a life together already.  Well I guess my future sister in law thought that was soooo hilarious the thought of me and my fiance not getting married that she just busted out laughing and laughed for a good five minutes.  She has only one drink so she wasn't even buzzed I'm sure.  She is constantly just saying remarks and doing this sort of thing to just be mean.  I don't want to cause more trouble to I just leave it alone and don't even let her see that it bothers me but it really does.  What do I say to her, if I should say anything at all?  Just to add she isn't just this way with me its the whole family.

futuremrsbruno

Don't say anything. She's going to point out that you and your FI were the ones who brought it up, joking or not, in the first place! It's only going to make things worse. Plus, you don't know if she was laughing at you, she could have been laughing at something else going on. In a situation like what you described, you will only make yourself look bad.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

You can't really just punch people unless you are into assault charges and such.

If you want to say something to her just take her aside and let her know that her comments are hurtful to you.  For real though, I'm not the type of person who gives people like that the time of day.  If they want to suck like that, then everyone around them is probably aware of what an asshole they are, so letting them keep acting like an asshole can actually be kind of funny.

kd.joseph

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_can-i-just-punch-her-in-the-face?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:01db310d-22d0-40ba-b6cd-870ac90335e0Post:08487b77-85de-494e-acd8-b99438bbd5db">Re: Can I just punch her in the face?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't understand the problem.  If she's saying inappropriate crap, then that's on her.  If it's that bothersome, your FI should handle it as it's his side of the family.
Posted by jcbsjr[/QUOTE]

This! My first thought is if she does this to everyone, not just you, she has issues. So, most likely you arent the only one she "doesnt care for" in this family. I wouldnt let it bother me too much, if she doesnt matter to you in your life than she should have any effect on you.

Go on with your life and ignore her and side step her as much as possible, she may just be a negative person who is not happy with her own life.

And yes, let your FI talk to his brother if it's really and issue, but I wouldnt give her the satisfaction.

softballbabe1515

Obvioulsy I'm not really going to punch her even though sometimes I want to, I wouldn't ever really do it.  Nobody else even laughed because it was sort of just said between him and I not really to the whole table and she heard it and just started laughing so hard she sort of fell over and nobody knew why she was laughing everyone looked at her so confused and asked her why she was laughing and she wouldn't say why.  I guess you would have to know her to really understand how she is.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_can-i-just-punch-her-in-the-face?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:01db310d-22d0-40ba-b6cd-870ac90335e0Post:f124c092-0815-43c7-a319-40492e8a371f">Re: Can I just punch her in the face?</a>:
[QUOTE]Obvioulsy I'm not really going to punch her even though sometimes I want to, I wouldn't ever really do it.  Nobody else even laughed because it was sort of just said between him and I not really to the whole table and she heard it and just started laughing so hard she sort of fell over and nobody knew why she was laughing everyone looked at her so confused and asked her why she was laughing and she wouldn't say why.  I guess you would have to know her to really understand how she is.
Posted by softballbabe1515[/QUOTE]

It sounds like she made herself look like a complete moron in front of the entire family.  Trust me, you don't have to say anything, lol.

kd.joseph

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_can-i-just-punch-her-in-the-face?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:01db310d-22d0-40ba-b6cd-870ac90335e0Post:f124c092-0815-43c7-a319-40492e8a371f">Re: Can I just punch her in the face?</a>:
[QUOTE]Obvioulsy I'm not really going to punch her even though sometimes I want to, I wouldn't ever really do it.  Nobody else even laughed because it was sort of just said between him and I not really to the whole table and she heard it and just started laughing so hard she sort of fell over and nobody knew why she was laughing everyone looked at her so confused and asked her why she was laughing and she wouldn't say why.  I guess you would have to know her to really understand how she is.
Posted by softballbabe1515[/QUOTE]

Sounds like something else is going on with her. Like I said let it roll off you. We've all had to deal with annoying people in our lives. She wont be your last.

ersatzpnk

You're allowed to vent. And I would say I would want to punch her in the face, too, even if only 5% of me really wanted to. I'm sure you wouldn't, but it feels good to say.

She may be:

1. Jealous. You and your FI are getting the attention of that family right now. It's all about you. 

2. Concerned about her and your relationship. Granted, I'm not there, but maybe she was laughing because you were joking. Maybe she was trying to laugh at what she thought was a joke to make you feel like she "got you". She probably realizes that she doesn't know you at all (and vise-versa). She may see you as coming into the family, and she wants to get to know you because you are where she was at one point. 

3. She could just be a brat. But, don't jump to that conclusion.

I honestly thought my fiance's sister-in-law HATED me. But, then I sat down with her and had a few drinks while my fiance and his brother (her husband) were doing something together, and realized she wasn't "that bad". Now, if I had to choose a future sister-in-law-in-law (is that how it goes?), I don't know if I'd choose her. But she's not terrible. She has some good points, came up with a killer idea for my wedding, and she and I are working on our relationship. She was actually just protecting her brother-in-law because of something my fiance's brother said to her about me that wasn't true. I set the record straight on that one. Maybe you have the same thing going on?

[Deleted User]

She sounds annoying, but I don't get the animosity over laughing about a joke you made. Would you rather have her agree that you should back out? I don't get it.

KateJ10

I just have one thing to add: I tend to watch what H and I joke about/say/treat each other in front of other people. What is totally understood and funny to us may not come off the same way around others. 

prymar08

Eh, she sounds like an miserable person. I would take her aside next time she says something snarky and ask her if and why she has a problem with you. My guess is that she'll deny it all, but that will make you look like the better person for trying to get the issue resolved.

dmiller9274

Maybe you had a booger in your nose or some food stuck in your teeth, and she was really just laughing at that. 

lbarr088

Just punch her in the face.  You know you want to.  Plus, that would actually make this a good story.

Blueyed228

I say punch her in the face

Anysunrise

You can't break up a social unit.

(C'mon Ricks, this is going to look reeeeally weird without you.)

welikebikes

I would've just left. "Yep see ya later!" But I've been dealing with my family being idiots since I met my fiance and don't really tolerate it anymore.