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Anyone else feel like they've lost control of the wedding?

I don't remember what I want or don't want anymore.  Or who's idea anything was.  I'm sure it'll be beautiful and we'll love it.  I just can't tell what's being spent on what.  Now we are trying to plan honeymoon and I'm losing it. lol

Anyone else in a wedding blur?
Wedding date: September 10, 2011

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Re: Anyone else feel like they've lost control of the wedding?

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    Nope. My planning was pretty much stress free.

    Take a deep breath and don't sweat the little things. Most importantly, keep telling yourself that it's just a party
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    CellesCelles member
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    No. I used a spreadsheet to keep track of all of my expenses; every receipt was scanned and logged. It really wasn't hard.

    Choosing cake flavors? Now THAT was hard. :p
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    Make a list.  I have checklists of what we've done, what needs to be done, and what we've spent.  I also have a binder where all of those lists AND vendor contracts are stored. 

    Plan it the same way you would plan any other big project.  It's been pretty stress free for us.
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    I tracked every single penny until the last week. Then I stopped tracking because I knew we weren't going to go into debt. Then I spent wantonly. It was ugly but necessary.

    A wedding is only as stressful as you make it. Remember that it is your day but it isn't your day alone. Remember that you can't always make everyone else happy but that your happiness isn't the only thing that matters. Remember that it is only one day but how you approach that day kinda says something about how you will approach the rest of your marriage. 
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    reilsreils member
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    I have been making lots of lists and just made pretty much all the decisions on my own (FI was okay with this, I asked him what parts he cared about he had input in those areas). 
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    Lists, spreadsheats & a binder are your friend! When making your budget it's super helpful to have an "anticipated cost" column and "actual cost". It helps me keep track of what I expect everything to cost and how much of my budget I'm actually spending for each item.
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    SEWFSEWF member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    Lists, lists, and more lists.

    I kept a spreadsheet on my laptop of all expenses and took it with me everywhere. I even took it with me to the wedding!

    Also, go get a massage! Go sit in the park and read! Go on a date your your FI! Do something that had nothing to do with the wedding. That's where a lot of wedding stress comes from- when it's the ONLY thing you think about, you tend to over-obsess. Then, after you relax, you are able to think more rationally and calmly about what really needs to be done.

    The day of my wedding, I felt no stress at all (except trying to get my husband out of bed after his bachelor party the night before). 

    Like PP said, remember it's a big party. All you really need is you, your FI, your officiant, 2 witnesses, and a license. Nothing else is of dire importance. Just remember that as long as you and your FI get married, nothing else matters (although you do have have seats for everyone and you have to feed your guests something, even just cake... that's a big one).

    And the day of my wedding, I was ready 1 1/2 hours early, walking around my venue with my mom. I ate a donut. Listened to Journey. Do something to relax. You'll be fine!
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    edited May 2011
    I can understand how planning can be stressful or overwhelming at times, depending on your situation.

    But PP's are right. Lists are your friend. At the beginning of planning I got a binder and seperated it by section. One for guest list, one each for venue and all the vendors plus one for random ideas like songs, flowers, dresses, honeymoon destinations and so on.

    I put in copies of each contract and I keep a spreadsheet on my computer of pricing, what was paid/owed etc. It helps a lot, I promise.

    Get yourself a binder or notebook/folder and take a day to organize everything you have and it will help you to keep your head on straight.
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    Another suggestion, if you are feeling too overwhelmed to start making lists: Barnes and Noble has a bunch of different planning books/binders in their wedding section. Complete with checklists already written for you and everything, broken down by closeness to the wedding and category. They also have space to put in all the budget info. Basically, all the benefits of having a binder without the work of making one in the first place. If you are really feeling overwhelmed that might be a good idea.
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    OOTB is right about the books.  I was overwhelmed when I first got engaged because it seemed like there were SO many decisions and details.  Having a book helped (or you can find a ton of free stuff online) because I was able to identify each aspect we'd have to deal with--venue, officiant, guest list, etc.
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    Thanks, all! 

    I do have a planning binder. The problem is that most of the planning is being done by my mother, so I don't know WHAT's happening.  I was worried that all the design elements I picked out weren't going to mesh, and that money was being spent on silly things that I THOUGHT I wanted, and then changed my mind and maybe I'd rather allocate those funds to honeymoon.

    I took a breather, refocused.  Make a few idea boards of all the things that were already chosen, and what was in the planning stages still and it made me feel better.

    Everything is coming together very well, and I'm super excited.  Only four months to go!  Now we just have to pick and order invites and send them out.....

    We meet with our wedding consultant from our caterers/location next weekend and I have my first bridal shower the same weekend. It's exciting, but nerve wracking at the same time.  We didn't even have a year to plan because fiance thought we wouldn't need it.  Silly guys.  Now i feel like it's down to the wire.

    Thanks again, all! You rock!
    Wedding date: September 10, 2011

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