We wanted a wedding with about 75 people, but just MYaunts, uncles, grandparents and 1st cousins were at 65! That's not taking into account that most of my cousins are married, have about 3-4 kids each, and insist on bringing all of them everywhere. My family is also always fighting and is very high-drama, which I want nothing to do with. I haven't even seen most of these people in over 8 years. We decided to go "adults only", but 2 of my cousins who have 8 kids between them informed my mother they were "heartbroken" they couldn't bring their kids. My mother caved and told them it was fine to bring them. Now everyoen thinks that their kids are the "exception". I've never met any of these children and I wanted a more adult event. I've also had several cousins who I invited as singles ( I didn't put "& guest" on their invites) tell my mom they were bringing their new girlfriends to my wedding. My FH was pressured into inviting some of his co-workers, distant family members and friends he hasn't seen in years. I told him that I had cut cousins and most of my friends so we needed to compromise. He agreed, talked to those people, and came back telling me that several of them told him they wouldn't be able to make it, he wanted to invite them as a courtesy, which I was completely fine with. Imagine my surprise when I start receiving "Will Attend" RSVP's from these people. My FH called them and they had cleared their previous schedules to come to the wedding! We had invited about 120 people. It looks as though we are going to have about 150! There were many family members I didn't invite for various reasons and I've been informed that most of them plan on showing up anyway...uninvited! I'm paying $75 per plate and we are only having as many chairs as people that RSVP, so this could cause some problems. I'm about to throw in the towel. Everytime I put my foot down, my mother goes behind my back and tells people that it's fine. I've also noticed that everyone is going to my mom with questions and these problems instead of me. I am planning from out-of-state, we live in Kansas, are getting married in Nebraska, and most of our guests are from Iowa, Colorado and Kansas. Because of this, on 2 of our inserts, FH and I put OUR contact information for anyone who had additional questions. I'm normally very laid-back, but I'm starting to get a little upset about this whole thing. Anyone have any advice on how to handle this or been in this situation before?