I Need A Well-Worded Comeback

Rapunzil

Hello Ladies!

I am getting married in March, it will be my second (and last!) wedding

We are keeping it small, but already I have people throwing in their 2 cents about "why are you doing it that way" or "If it was me I would..." 

While I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, I will not allow myself to get caught up in this nonsense.  So I was wondering if anyone might have any good combacks for me to nip this in the bud.  Something that will make a person shut their trap right quick, but yet not come off as too bitchy.  LOL!

Thank you!!!!!

[Deleted User]

Well a simple, "F U" only tends to put the idiot on the defensive.
I go for the kindler, subtle approach and turn it back to them.
"I'm not sure I understand how any of this affects you", followed by a the kind of smile that says, "FU"

Good luck and I wish you much happiness.

kd.joseph

This is the way my FI and I want to do it, it's our wedding. So how are you Aunt Mildred?

That's a nice suggestion, we'll think about it. Have you tried the bean dip?

Oh FI and I have already arranged all that, thanks for the thought. So how you feeling after your gall bladder sugery?

See what I did there. Easy, in one ear out the other.

tidetravel

Just change the subject.  It's none of their business and not worth your time.

tidetravel

Also, I'd like to know what you are planning that other people are questioning.  Mostly, because I am nosy, but also to make sure they aren't "right." 

dmiller9274

When people try to boss me around, I usually tell them to go wash their mouth out with a revolver. Usually that'll slow down the questions.

kd.joseph

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-a-well-worded-comeback?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6eab0c65-b9d1-40a0-bd6b-c0335a638e42Post:42e28160-bdbf-4951-9225-4d69fe917e7e">Re: I Need A Well-Worded Comeback</a>:
[QUOTE]When people try to boss me around, I usually tell them to go wash their mouth out with a revolver. Usually that'll slow down the questions.
Posted by dmiller9274[/QUOTE]

Well thats cause you are badass and may just offer to hold the revolver for them!


Oh HI!

dmiller9274

hi kd! See I'm trying to remember to swing by from time to time

I like to come around and be super helpful.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-a-well-worded-comeback?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6eab0c65-b9d1-40a0-bd6b-c0335a638e42Post:42e28160-bdbf-4951-9225-4d69fe917e7e">Re: I Need A Well-Worded Comeback</a>:
[QUOTE]When people try to boss me around, I usually tell them to go wash their mouth out with a revolver. Usually that'll slow down the questions.
Posted by dmiller9274[/QUOTE]

or that could be equally effective...

kd.joseph

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-a-well-worded-comeback?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6eab0c65-b9d1-40a0-bd6b-c0335a638e42Post:e867bb7a-9e58-4fa2-848f-7ed1024bdf92">Re: I Need A Well-Worded Comeback</a>:
[QUOTE]hi kd! See I'm trying to remember to swing by from time to time ;) I like to come around and be super helpful.
Posted by dmiller9274[/QUOTE]

You are always helpful. Unlike some.

LmayB2B

I was always taught to kill them with kindness! It works in the strangest scenarios... 

Rapunzil

I'm cracking up at the suggestions here.  The revolver one was too funny!

This will not be our first wedding.  My fiance and I  want to have just a dinner after ceremony in a small fine-dining restaurant with immediate family only.

I have been avoiding the subject of my wedding as much as possible with folks for the very reason that I don't want other peoples opinons on how I should do things, and don't want to chance offending anyone that isn't going to be invited.  I've already warned my immediate family to please not write anything about my wedding on facebook - just to be on safe side and keep it on the down-low.

The particular person who has started questioning me is a friend.  When she noticed my engagement ring she invited herself, her family and 2 mutual friends (but don't forget their husbands!)  I did try to detour the convo by saying we want a small wedding in a fine dining establishment.  With kindness, she offered that we have our reception as a backyard BBQ at her house - that way we can have food cheaper therefore invite more people..... 

The LAST thing I want is a backyard barbecue!  Yes, they are fun, but not what we want for our wedding.  This is part of the reason why we set the date for March 17.   Not exactly BBQ friendly time of year here in NJ LOL!

rusngl2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_i-need-a-well-worded-comeback?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6eab0c65-b9d1-40a0-bd6b-c0335a638e42Post:0ef57a46-cb51-4363-ae9c-e53a247d0a20">Re: I Need A Well-Worded Comeback</a>:
[QUOTE]...<strong>The particular person who has started questioning me is a friend.  When she noticed my engagement ring she invited herself, her family and 2 mutual friends (but don't forget their husbands!)</strong>  I did try to detour the convo by saying we want a small wedding in a fine dining establishment. ...Posted by Rapunzil[/QUOTE]

WOW can you say AKWARD!!! Does she know that she/they aren't invited? She's probably trying to be helpful, like most people in these situation but may not be getting the hint that when you said small, you really really meant small.  People's ideas of what a small wedding is vary widely....

Rapunzil

Exactly Rusngl!  Yes, it will be even more awkward when the wedding gets closer.  I'm sure other friends are going to end up asking me about the wedding - seems the only correct answer for me to give them is "we are having FAMILY ONLY."  Its still going to be uncomfortable, but its the honest answer.  And I will absolutley follow with "We are really happy with our decision on the matter, its exactly what we wanted" as Harry suggested.  GREAT RESPONSE Harry!  THANK YOU!!!!!

Rapunzil

Oh, I just thought of something else maybe you all can help me with! 

We decided no children at our wedding.  I have nephews (6 mo & 4 yrs), 1 small niece (3) and 1 older (13) neice.  My fiance has a couple of small nephews too.

Here's the problem - my older niece  (13) and I are close.  I am not having a big wedding party; just my older neice to act as Jr. MOH during the ceremony.  If a best man was not required in our Greek Orthodox ceremony, we wouldn't have a bridal party at all.

How can I go about not offending my other sisters about not bringing their small kids?  I kinda think they will understand, and actually not be upset to have an evening out with their just their husbands.  But I'd still like a way to tactfully let them know.  I don't think its appropriate to put it in the invitation.  And I'm sure the subject is going to come up with my Mother.  Maybe I can tell my mom and she can pass on the info......  Can you say COP-OUT!? LOL!

kipnus

There is a huge difference between a 13 yr old and a 4 yr old. I think it would be quite reasonable to say you are not having children under 12 at your wedding.