Snarky Brides
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freaking out!

Ok past brides (and planning ones).... did anyone else have heart palpitations over the number of people on their guest list?! We aimed for 150 but the mothers got the list to 233... and that's WITH cutting people!!!

AAHHHHHH

The hall does hold 220... but seriously how many people % wise actually came to weddings?! I am still freaking out... the number of people will totally blow my budget but there is honestly no one else to cut. We both come from big families we are close to...

So what happened with everyone else? Did things just pan out and people did not come or what?! HELP!...... *whew*..... *deep breath*

Re: freaking out!

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    You're just going to have to cut someone, somewhere if it exceeds your budget. Cut 2nd cousins or whatever.
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    ggmaeggmae member
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    Out of curiosity, who is paying for the wedding?
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    I get so annoyed when people invite over their venue capacity. What are you going to do if everyone comes? You'll be in contravention of fire code...what a great plan for your wedding.

    If you're freaking out, cut some people. I can't imagine you're sooooooo close to all of those 233 people that you can't cut anyone.
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    Plan for 100% attendance and do not invite more than the venue can hold. Look to see if you can remove some very distant relatives, friends of friends, or old coworkers. Something dh and I used for our guest list (excluding family) was "Do they know both of us/both of our names." If our friend's didn't know both of our names, did we really want them at the wedding, since we obviously were not as close as we used to be.

    That being said, our venue could hold 300. We invited 110, 75 rsvp'd yes, 60 showed up to the actual wedding. Do not bank on people not coming though.
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    Unless your mothers are paying, they don't have a say over the guest list.  If you're freaking out about it, it's time for the red marker.  Just because your venue CAN hold those people doesn't mean you can afford to have them all there (this is the gist of the post that I'm getting from you.)  Work in circles and make cuts from both sides.  If you cannot invite everyone from that circle, then no one gets invited.

    1)  immediate family (siblings, parents, children, grandparents)
    2)  close friends
    3)  extended family (aunts, uncles, 1st cousins, etc.)
    4)  start making your own circles from here dependant on your situation: friends, family friends, super extended family, coworkers, etc.) 

    OR, figure out how many people you can afford to host.  Split the number into thirds, and give each set of parents a specific # of people they can invite.  They'll have to make the decision as to whom is important enough to be invited.
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    It's okay to say no, even to your mom.  My dad has 27 first cousins, we invited some, but certainly not all.
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    Um, Op, Come back?
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    I would only invite 220 at the most.  You shouldn't ever invite more than your venue can hold.  That's just asking for trouble.   I do understand about going over budget and over the amount of people you thought you'd be inviting.  We originally thought 150.....our guest list is now at 223 and I know my mother will be adding someone else at some point.  For me its okay because my parents are paying for the wedding so they can add on as many people as they want since it's their money (I'm just not adding more people) . 
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    No, I didn't have heart palpitations, because I didn't invite more than I could handle. It's foolish to invite more than the venue can hold.

    We invited about 127. 110 came total, although I expected less than that. You can't count on a certain number of people to not show up. And they might bring extras. Two of our guests brought their kids along when they said they would be with sitters for the wedding. You never know.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_freaking-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:9ac5c622-9eeb-4d5e-acf1-e26242ee3ce4Post:bbf61430-8717-4bf7-8414-70fb1d30b40d">freaking out!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ok past brides (and planning ones).... <strong><u>did anyone else have heart palpitations over the number of people on their guest list?!</u></strong> We aimed for 150 but the mothers got the list to 233... and that's WITH cutting people!!! AAHHHHHH The hall does hold 220... but seriously how many people % wise actually came to weddings?! I am still freaking out... the number of people will totally blow my budget but there is honestly no one else to cut. We both come from big families we are close to... So what happened with everyone else? Did things just pan out and people did not come or what?! HELP!...... *whew*..... *deep breath*
    Posted by missejayne[/QUOTE]

    To answer this question, I wanted a small beach wedding (and would have done the Vegas drive-thru if FI agreed) but now the list is at 250.  Our venue holds 650 and our budget is fine for the 250.

    My advice would be to make sure that your budget allows you to have enough food for everyone and to not skimp on that just to have more people.

    You should always plan on 100% attendance.  Your venue should be able to hold your entire guest list.
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