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Feeling burned out

So, right now I'm feeling seriously burned out and just downright frustrated. :( I don't think I would be exaggerating by saying I've been doing a majority of the wedding planning and preparations. My family and (including maid of honor) all live out of town, so it's been difficult to obtain much of their help. My fiance helps on some things, but I really do feel like I have to more or less nag him to get things done (which doesn't feel great either and is stressful for both of us).

Right now I'm at a point where the save-the-dates are going out later than we wanted and now they're hinged on two things: my finace finishing two sections I left for him to complete on the website (groomsmen and the proposal story) and we need just one more address (his brother's address). And yet when I asked for this to get completed, my fiance pretty much had a meltdown, told me he's too overwhelmed, he's need a break from wedding planning, and that he's been feeling depressed lately. I want to be supportive...but I also find myself feeling frustrated. I feel like I'm working really hard to the point where I'm doing wedding stuff and going to work, and that's pretty much it. I'm burnt out too...but I know no one else is going to do this stuff...clearly, no one else is going to do this stuff. In a way, that makes me feel pretty depressed. Any thoughts?

Re: Feeling burned out

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    Send the STD's. 

    I planned my circus on my own too.  It can be overwhelming.  Just make a list and check things off as they come up.  H was no help, or rather, he only wanted to help with the fun stuff.  You will be fine.
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    Just withhold sex, that's what I did.

    Wait...
    panther
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_feeling-burned-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:b3f78d25-babd-492e-8252-f3fd7eef3643Post:71ce7c9c-1145-4857-b945-074167dd4ed2">Feeling burned out</a>:
    [QUOTE]So, right now I'm feeling seriously burned out and just downright frustrated. :( I don't think I would be exaggerating by saying I've been doing a majority of the wedding planning and preparations. My family and (including maid of honor) all live out of town, so it's been difficult to obtain much of their help. My fiance helps on some things, but I really do feel like I have to more or less nag him to get things done (which doesn't feel great either and is stressful for both of us). Right now I'm at a point where the save-the-dates are going out later than we wanted and now they're hinged on two things: my finace finishing two sections I left for him to complete on the website (groomsmen and the proposal story) and we need just one more address (his brother's address). And yet when I asked for this to get completed, my fiance pretty much had a meltdown, told me he's too overwhelmed, he's need a break from wedding planning, and that he's been feeling depressed lately. I want to be supportive...but I also find myself feeling frustrated. I feel like I'm working really hard to the point where I'm doing wedding stuff and going to work, and that's pretty much it. I'm burnt out too...but I know no one else is going to do this stuff...clearly, no one else is going to do this stuff. In a way, that makes me feel pretty depressed. Any thoughts?
    Posted by KatieFitz84[/QUOTE]

    The address part is easy. Call your FBIL. There, done.

    The wedding website, well, he's either going to have to do it, or you are. Or neither of you do it.

    You've got 6 months to do everything you've got left, and I think you'll be ok. You just have to breathe.
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    Ok first take a deeeeeep breath!

    You have to understand that most of the planning IS left up to you.  Of course your parents have a say if they are paying but most of the legwork is left up to you.  Yes it can be frustrating but the checklist is there for a reason.....to make this easier for you.  My MOH whom is my sister also lives OOT but A LOT can be done via email and phone calls.  My mother lives 15 min from me and most of this has been done via emai and phone calls as well.  Most guys I know arent into the whole writing about myself part of the website so sit with him and ask the questions and you type it up...this can be done before the end of the night so grab the laptop and get on it.  You can send out the STD's without waiting on his brothers address....no one is going to call each other asking what day they got theirs vs the others,etc.  Go to post office on the way to work tomorrow and send them off....you will feel MUCH better when you do, even if you dont have the brothers address quite yet ;)

     

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    Thanks for the feedback everyone. I've just been feeling pretty alone in this.
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    Well, it's your show.  MOH and bridesmaids aren't supposed to be your wedding planners.  Family is out of town.  FI is a guy and well, that's pretty much self-explanatory.  Who's going to plan it if you don't?
    panther
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    I am practically doing everything myself also.  It gets a bit overwhelming  but I know it will get done the way I want it.  My fiance and I sat down prior to planning and he listed what he wanted to do, which were very few items, and I agreed because I understand that wedding planning isnt for the majority of men.

    But what I didnt want was for us to get weighed down by all the planning.  I can tell when I watch wedding shows, his eyes roll a bit.  I just make sure that I keep the planning separate to help keep us both sane until the time comes.

    I dont want to get burnt out on planning nor do I want us to get burnt out from always talking about the wedding plans.

    You just need some time to breathe.  Relax.  Write a list of what you need done and like someone else mentioned, check it off as you do it.  If he isnt completing the tasks, then you do it or remove it from the list (ie Website.  I removed the proposal story and a few other items from our website. ) 

    This is suppose to be fun for the most part...with some stresses... but dont let everything consume you or you will drive you and him crazy. :)

    Good luck and congrats! :)
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_feeling-burned-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:b3f78d25-babd-492e-8252-f3fd7eef3643Post:23c21caa-bf2c-470f-a69d-90f7293ed0c9">Re: Feeling burned out</a>:
    [QUOTE]Well, it's your show.  MOH and bridesmaids aren't supposed to be your wedding planners.  Family is out of town.  FI is a guy and well, that's pretty much self-explanatory.  <strong>Who's going to plan it if you don't?
    </strong>Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

    I agree. It is your wedding after all and you agreed to it. Just go with the flow, if things don't get done then they don't get done. Send out your STD's and start working on the next thing. No use worrying and stressing about it. The most important part is you, your FI, and the officiant. Everything else is extra.
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