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Help! I can't do this huge wedding thing...

I got engaged in the beginning of August, and since then I've been stressing about planning a big traditional wedding in DC. 
Both my fiance and I have really large families, so there's no way that we can have a small local wedding. This week, I finally found the most reasonable (and still beautiful) wedding reception venue in DC. They sent over the contract, and when we were talking about whether we were going to pull the trigger, I basically freaked out. 
My ideal wedding would be small, outdoor, and informal with good food, great wine, immediate family, and close friends. I think it would be so amazing to have it in Italy or somewhere like that. I realized that our "DC wedding" was exactly the opposite. 
Does anyone have any advice? My fiance thinks the Italy idea would be really selfish, but honestly the thought of having 150 guests is causing me a lot of anxiety. It seems like the only way we can avoid that is by doing the destination thing (or have a tiny wedding abroad and then have a reception back home), because I cannot have a wedding here and not invite all of these relatives. 
Thank you!!
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