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My sister wants to live off of welfare

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Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare

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    Like, live completely off welfare? 

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    Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
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    No she wants to work and get assistance. She wants to move out of my mom's house and to do that she will need assistance.
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    I am sorry she is making a choice like that for herself. A lifestyle of poverty is not something most of us want.
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    marateamaratea member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited September 2010
    Nutpunch, err cuntpunch. No but really, just tell her how you feel?

    When my brother was on umeployment and not really looking for a job, just sitting around playing XBox, I told him if he didn't start looking for a job soon, he could get the hell out of our (H and I's) house. So he moved back in with my parents. Then my dad told him to get a job, and surprise! A week later, he was employed. Apparently threats from my father have more serious consequences. 

    I love my brother unconditionally, but fuckhim if he's going to pull one over on the system, while H and I work hard to bring home just enough money to support ourselves.  

    ETA: Well at least she wants to work instead of just sitting around mooching.
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    Oh, and pardon my stupid but how much exactly can she work and still get assistance??
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    My sister is a heartless b!tch but I hate being mean to people uggh. I do not support people living on welfare if they have other means to support themselves.

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_sister-wants-live-off-of-welfare?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:fd6b6651-cafe-4615-8c24-22fd767c3b98Post:b4fbf503-8863-4f78-b88b-aa65800d8303">Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oh, and pardon my stupid but how much exactly can she work and still get assistance??
    Posted by Lenore2010[/QUOTE]

    She makes about 7-8 dollars an hour?
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    Is this like a "I really want to move out so I plan to get some assistance until I can find a better means to support myself" plan, or a "Isn't it kick ass that I can make 7 bucks an hour and still move out because of welfare!!!!!" plan?

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    Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
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    Can you tell her honestly that this is unacceptable?  Probably not - people who have a mindset like that don't have much regard for reasonable people.  This would infuriate me - stand on your own two feet, earn a living, and take care of your own business. 
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_sister-wants-live-off-of-welfare?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:fd6b6651-cafe-4615-8c24-22fd767c3b98Post:6c16a7dd-f309-4bf4-8381-bf3ddb0cdf21">Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare</a>:
    [QUOTE]My sister is a heartless b!tch but I hate being mean to people uggh. I do not support people living on welfare if they have other means to support themselves.
    Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]

    It will make you feel so much better.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_sister-wants-live-off-of-welfare?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:fd6b6651-cafe-4615-8c24-22fd767c3b98Post:a2a78f67-a911-4f6d-a936-e2a5887f5c3e">Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare : She makes about 7-8 dollars an hour?
    Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]

    If she is a single person without a kid, even in Minnesota she would be pretty much out of luck getting on any form of assistance except MN Care for health insurance. They might give her 20 bucks in food stamps, maybe.

    I am no fan of public aid except for the disabled, elderly, or as a very temporary measure BUT it is no where near as easy to get as people think.
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    I have no idea JK. Her motives are always selfish so I always think the worst. The bad thing is I friended her on FB and she
    a. talks in gangsta slang/text speak all the time
    b. always complaining about how she can't find a good man
    c. always bitching about how shitty her life is.
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    My friend lost her job and she had just found out she was abotu 3 wks pregnant.. yeah that sucks... but it happens the company was downsizing..

    Well instead of looking for a job or even doing just temp work till the baby came... she and her FI sat on their butts for 9 months and lived off the govt bc she didnt want to work cause she was pregnant... OHHH it p*ssed me off .. ehre I am  going to school and working full time.. to pay for her to sit on her butt..

    Needless to say I didnt talk to her for a while bc I was trying to not be mad at her and go off on her.
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    I don't think what she's doing is the worst thing in the world, from what you've written.  Your mom's life can't be a picnic with her living there, so it's cool that she's getting out that house, right?  

    If she's only making $7 an hour, that is poverty wage.  I can get behind the government giving assistance to people who are working, but not making enough to rent a place, eat regularly, have a car or take a bus, on their own. 
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    Jessie that would pissme off too.
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    Yeah I  live in welfare central down here!  some people deserve it and really do need help.. but its the ones taht drive lexus's and have iphone and pay for thier food with food stamps but their alcohol with 100s that i dont appreciate
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    Yeah OWN I agree but my mom wants to help her. I am all for my sister moving out and I don't mind if she gets public assistance for a while but I am afraid she will be one of those people to abuse the system. I do know my mom needs a break b/c she watches my niece all the time and my sister and her fight constantly. My mom has COPD so she needs rest. Uggh I don't know if I should encourage my sister or not.
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    That's a tough one, then.  It is frustrating, but honestly I think I'd look at the good that'll happen for your mother over the bad that'll happen for . . .  I don't know, society at large?  I WISH welfare was only used by people who need a temporary helping hand, but I know that's not the case.  Your sister using it to subsidize a very meager income is relatively benign, in my opinion. 
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    OH, and also - she won't be living the high life.  Given that she IS working, that she is healthy and all that, she won't be given much more than bare minimum.  She's likely to have a cut-off looming, too - she can't game the system forever.   
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    It makes me sad she is choosing this life for herself. OWN I think I will tell her to do it if she needs to but only as a temp solution. I really want my mom to get some rest.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_sister-wants-live-off-of-welfare?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:fd6b6651-cafe-4615-8c24-22fd767c3b98Post:6c16a7dd-f309-4bf4-8381-bf3ddb0cdf21">Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare</a>:
    [QUOTE]My sister is a heartless b!tch but I hate being mean to people uggh.<strong> I do not support people living on welfare if they have other means to support themselves.</strong>
    Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]

    I don't think it's mean if you say this to her. maybe it'll change her mind?
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    Yeah Lala I would hope so but gosh she's a drama queen lol.
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    My sister's ex sister-in-law has a baby every three years.  Why? So she can stay on the WIC program.  They cut you off when your youngest child is three.  She's got four right now, let's see how many more she can pop out.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_sister-wants-live-off-of-welfare?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:fd6b6651-cafe-4615-8c24-22fd767c3b98Post:fb65ba19-b1ac-421a-b9d6-f2cce7fb1c84">Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have no idea JK. Her motives are always selfish so I always think the worst. The bad thing is I friended her on FB and she a. talks in gangsta slang/text speak all the time b. always complaining about how she can't find a good man c. always bitching about how shitty her life is.
    Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]
    I agree with PPs that you should just let her know that you think it's not a permanent solution, but if it helps her get established on her own and is a step to a better job, then it may be a viable TEMPORARY solution for her.

    At the same time, I would reply to each and every one of her FB posts in a snarky yet supportive way (I was a drug counselor for women on parole, and I found that challenging people's whininess and sense of entitlement was very important in getting them to change their thinking). 

    So when she talks in gangsta slang/text, I'd make a comment like "Wow, I could have sworn English was your first language". **Note, this is only effective if you don't make spelling or grammar mistakes yourself.

    And when she complains about how she can't find a good man, I'd make a comment like, "Maybe you should spend less time trying to find a good man and more time trying to find a good job.  In fact, maybe if you find a good job, you'll start meeting better men."

    And when she bitches about how shitty her life is, I'd ask her what she plans to do about it.

    Not sure if any of that is useful or applicable for you and your sister, but it's what I'd do.  :)
    "Plus who needs a purse when you have a wedding dress? Those things are like walking hobo bags just waiting to be stuffed with surprise treasures." -Wedinator.com image
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_sister-wants-live-off-of-welfare?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:fd6b6651-cafe-4615-8c24-22fd767c3b98Post:75cd6864-8c1d-4622-b269-1086f45e1653">Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare</a>:
    [QUOTE]Nutpunch, err cuntpunch. No but really, just tell her how you feel? When my brother was on umeployment and not really looking for a job, just sitting around playing XBox, I told him if he didn't start looking for a job soon, he could get the hell out of our (H and I's) house. So he moved back in with my parents. Then my dad told him to get a job, and surprise! A week later, he was employed. Apparently threats from my father have more serious consequences.  I love my brother unconditionally, but fuckhim if he's going to pull one over on the system, while H and I work hard to bring home just enough money to support ourselves.   ETA: Well at least she wants to work instead of just sitting around mooching.
    Posted by maratea[/QUOTE]

    FYI, unemployment is not the same as welfare.  You pay into unemployment, you can only be on it for a certain amount of time and you only get out of it what you pay into it.  While someone staying at home and playing xbox while collecting unemployment isn't the smartest thing to do, since you can typically only collect it for a year, it's not the same as refusing to work and living off the tax payer's money, i.e.: welfare. 
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    LOL you all know how I feel about this; suffice it to say, I don't agree with her doing that.  :-)

    Married in Vegas - June 2011


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    My sister PLANNED to get pregnant knowing that they did not have maternity coverage on their insurance plan because she thought "hey, if all the illegals can come have thier babies for free, why can't I?"

    They got denied for Medicaid, she had a panic attack at the doctor's office when they told her they needed $350 that day for her appointment and she didn't have it.  Then a few days later, her FB status was "going to the Dave Matthew's concert tonight!  I have the best hubby for getting me tickets".

    Apparently, I "upset" her when I asked her what they planned to do?  how were they going to pay for it? why couldn't they wait a year or so?  what happens if the baby isn't healthy? etc, etc....apparently she doesn't like hearing legitimate questions...so long as she's going to be a mommy right now, it doesnt' matter how.

    I don't talk to her very often because I'm afraid I'll completley blow up at her one day.
    Anniversary
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    This makes me so mad. Welfare was never intended to be a long-term solution for America and I hate that people abuse the system.

    Tell her to save her money for a few months and then find a roomate and move out when she can afford it. If she wants to live on her own like an adult she should make responsible decisions like one.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_sister-wants-live-off-of-welfare?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:fd6b6651-cafe-4615-8c24-22fd767c3b98Post:012892a7-7c91-474f-af1e-0b240e77950d">Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: My sister wants to live off of welfare : FYI, unemployment is not the same as welfare.  You pay into unemployment, you can only be on it for a certain amount of time and you only get out of it what you pay into it.  While someone staying at home and playing xbox while collecting unemployment isn't the smartest thing to do, since you can typically only collect it for a year, it's not the same as refusing to work and living off the tax payer's money, i.e.: welfare. 
    Posted by lezlers[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>I collected unemployment for 12 weeks in 2006 and loved every minute of it. I did send out 2-8 resumes per week. NO guilt. I was 41 years old, had my first full time job at 17 (early grad from high school) and had NEVER collected before. Welfare? Hell no! I paid into that system for YEARS.

    </div>
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    No one can really live off of welfare unless they're living in public housing/ projects or getting some other form of assistance- the checks are really very small. Welfare is also temporary so she can't depend to be on it for life. If she's working and making $7/hr, i'm assuming she's getting paid in cash since (at least in NY), if someone was working full-time earning those wages, they would be denied welfare due to income limits.

    I'm sorry you're feeling bad about this, but maybe with the Gov't assistance and wages from her job, she'll be able to make a living and will find something better to support herself. It may just be a stepping stone for her.
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