Ready to kill future SIL

TomCat2012

Okvent My fi and I have been engaged for 3 years we are footing the bill on very small incomes, and we're in noooo hurry and we decided when he proposed that we would wed 3 yrs exactly to the date. Last year his brother also got engaged, but they waited until this last Easter to announce they were getting married...July 13th this year. Which was going to be my bridal shower, but oh well. Now, after we've rescheduled and accommodated the first time, they've moved their wedding date to.... July 28th. Less than a month before ours. I was trying to be polite and accommodating, but OH MY GOD I WANT TO KILL HIS BROTHER's FIANC! And on to of that, we've been informed that they are not attending our wedding, because she doesn't like my fianc, her future BIL. I should add they they announced this at my house, during a family holiday that we were hosting. So I have to reschedule all my things just because she's flaky and tactless, but she can welcome herself and her uninvited riemds into my home, eat my food, and expect me to send them a gift of congratulations? I don't think so. Gahhhh! I'm not being unreasonable, right?

TomCat2012

There was punctuation in there, but I guess it doesn't post from an iphone

kthowell

If I was you I wouldnt go to their wedding unless she is just not coming and her husband is going to urs I would be pissed

ohnoitskaroljo

I don't blame you at all for being angry. As the PP said, if I were you I wouldn't attend hers unless your FI's brother is coming to yours alone. What a horrid wench. Sounds like my SIL actually LOL. Thinking the world revolves around her. Don't worry - if she's that selfish, the marriage will inevitably fail when the guy snaps out of his infatuation.

Tell her she's no longer welcome in your house since she doesn't like your FI. And be firm about it and hold your ground. Write her off the way she's writing your soon-to-be husband off!

DeClue82

So your FI's brother is not going to attend your wedding either? That is awful... and I hate spotlight stealers... why did they have to rush and plan their wedding in a few months and put their date right before yours? I would be MAD! My sister got engaged 1 month after me, and my fiance was really pissed at our FBIL for not waiting... he says it is just the bro code not to step on toes like that (they had been dating under a year at the time), plus it put added pressure on my dad who is helping pay the bills. 

I think your FI needs to talk to his brother and find out what this chic's problem is with him, and why she is not attending the wedding. maybe you can work some of that out...

dawnp917

Be the bigger person and attend their wedding. I disagree with PP that you should not allow them into your home. This is your FI brother it is up to him to decide how he wants to handle his family. Does he want to end his relationship with his brother, saying that FSIL is no longer welcome in your home will likely do that?

msowena

I agree with dawn917... it is his brother after all.

But no I don't think your overacting, I would be pissed too...mostly that they announced it at something I hosted in my home.

I would hope his brother would still attend the wedding without his FI though

VNEluvsAJB

Your anger is justified. That being said you should be the bigger person. Let your fiance discuss with his brother whether or not the brother will attend your wedding then leave it alone. If she's so awful it will help ease tension to not have her there anyway. Show your husband (and the rest of his family) that he's the lucky brother with the classy wife. Good Luck.

cshuler

I also agree with Dawnp917 and Msowena.

TomCat2012

Thanks ladies. We did invite them... I'd rather them have to RSVP no than hold some high school grudge match. I'm just soooo done trying to reschedule around her reschedules. Maybe they'll break up and do us all a favor. But thank you for your words of support! It's nice to know I'm not overblowing this. Go August weddings!