Getting in Shape
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Unmotivated

You would think with my wedding 7 months away I would be mroe motivated to lose the weight that I want to lose.  It isn't alot...well to me it is...like 15 pounds.  But 7 months is a good time period.  I just can't seem to be motivated.  In the back of my mind, I keep thinking I need to lose it or the dress won't fit.  It is a zip back and it fit great when I tried it on but between winter weight and stress eating, I have gained a bit.  But at the same time, I keep thinking my FI fell in love with me and not what I look like.  How is everyone getting motivated or staying motivated?  I bought the 30-shred dvd along with a few others.. I also bought a cardio dance dvd, hoping maybe if it was fun I would be more likely to exercise.  No such luck. 
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Re: Unmotivated

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    I was in the same boat as you at that point. However once I got closer to the wedding I got a lot more motivated. I have lost a little over 5 pounds so far and I have been going to the gym for about 2 months. I think as you get closer you will get more motivated.
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    Congrats on the weight loss.  I really hope that you are right.  I have never been really motivated when it comes to exercise.  I have no problem walking and so on but to go to the gym or specifically taking time to exercise is not my idea of fun.  Hopefully, I will get it together.  I am also hoping that once I hae an appt for my first fitting that will give me a goal and I will be more focused.
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    Yeah when I went in for my first fitting the seamstress told me that I need to lose at least 5 pounds or else I risk busting the seam at the zipper. That got me real motivated real fast. I can go to the gym but I am having a hard time staying on track with eating right. I have such a huge weakness for sweet foods. Maybe start off with eating better and then as the wedding gets closer incorporate the gym/other exercise into your routine. I don't think of the gym as fun either but then once I thought about myself on the beach in a bikini on our honeymoon and wearing a backless dress at our wedding it helped me get motivated.
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    You need to stop thinking about it in terms of "I need to lose x number of lbs before my wedding so I can fit in my dress" and start thinking about it in terms of "I want to get healthy so I will live longer and have a better quality of life".

    It's amazing how much better you feel when you start exercising on a regular basis and eat well.  For a lot of people, exercising isn't the most fun, you just have to make time for it.
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    Hey Chelly!!! I'm 5'5', 22 yrs old'.
    My FI fell in love with me when I was 180 pounds 4 years ago.  That summer I went nuts working out and lost a whole bunch of weight.  Eventually I got down to 145.  I was so much happier with my body and the clothes I could wear and the attn I got from other people.... THAT was motivation enough to maintain...  But now I weigh 165 and although my body may have matured, my goal is to get down to 150 for the wedding. 

    Being unmotivated is NOT something to be ashamed of.  After work sometimes I just go straight home and crash.  I have learned a few things that help.

    Chewing peppermint gum when I workout keeps me energized. 

    Looking at myself in the mirror every day before I get dressed and invisioning a different and better me. 

    Picturing my FI's face as I walk down the aisle on the day we marry.

    Bringing clothes to work and going RIGHT to the gym after. (not going home in between)

    Grabbing your bridesmaids to workout with you!! I do P90x at home and when I start slowing down or say "I'll just do half today" they notice that it is a call for help!!! Your friends are the best motivators.  I also love when I can talk my skinny, fast metabolism FI into working out with me!! :) Support is the best.

    Good luck!!
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    Hey chelley!

    It seems like it was just yesterday that I was thinking "the wedding is 9 months away, the wedding is 7 months away, the wedding is 5 months away" and time has flown so quickly I am now at 3 months and a bit and have just kicked my butt into gear! Crunch time is definitely a big motivating factor but now that I've started I can't believe I wasted all that time.

    I joined a gym 2 weeks ago and have started minding what I eat. For me it comes hand in hand: if I work out I eat better (because then I consider my workout a waste of time) but if I don't workout...then I'm eating like crazy. It's only been a little while so I guess it's a bit premature to say this, but I am feeling so great and energized and actually love going to the gym (have been 4 times this past week! Woot! woot!) that I can't see myself going back to my old ways. Agreeing with Raynes that this isn't just a countdown to the wedding anymore so much as it is a get healthy for life kinda outlook now (however I am still hoping to look totally awesome for June!).

    Another big motivator for me was reading one bride write her biggest regret was not pushing herself harder before the wedding because she was disappointed with the way she looked in her wedding photos. We are splurging for amazing expensive photographers- I don't wanna hate my flabby arms in our photos, I wanna be able to just focus on the smiles:)

    Good luck and keep us posted!
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_getting-shape_unmotivated?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:238Discussion:dacef5ac-b4aa-4353-8b6c-df35f55d25bcPost:3c9078f3-e06e-4d2f-921a-cd7ff63fd276">Re: Unmotivated</a>:
    [QUOTE]You need to stop thinking about it in terms of "I need to lose x number of lbs before my wedding so I can fit in my dress" and start thinking about it in terms of "I want to get healthy so I will live longer and have a better quality of life".
    Posted by raynes[/QUOTE]

    Exactly!
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    Agreed- I finally bit the bullet (mainly for FI's sake- he really wanted to lose weight and needs to) and got a trainer. There is an insanely good deal now through where I work to get a severly discounted membership at LA Fitness, and we also got a heavy discount on a trainer- went with that plan for a year, and are starting it.

    There is NO substitute for eating correctly and exercising regularly! You just tell yourself you can do this and it will improve your overall quality of life. If you think to yourself that this is "medicine" you need to stay healthy and live longer, then why wouldn't you take your daily dose of the gym!?
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    I bought my wedding dress after the holiday weight gain, so I don't have that as a motivator; however, I have wanted to be thinner for years. The wedding feels like a deadline for either (1) losing weight or (2) loving myself, as is.  I was a ballerina for over 10 years, but in college the weight crept up pretty fast. I would love to be long and lean again, but now, I'd be happy enough to tone up my jiggly parts. Since I met FI, I have lost a little weight and developed healthier eating habits, and I feel great for that.  Hooray for positive thinking!

    Last week, though, I hit the 6 month mark, freaked out Surprised about the weight I gained when I had mono last summer (and added to in December), and hired a personal trainer/student at the local university. I had been walking about 3 times a week for the past couple of months, but it just didn't cut it for me. Luckily, hiring a student meant big savings for me. He's already certified as a trainer, but he doesn't have many hours yet. It works well for me because he's there to motivate me to work harder, not to quit just because I'd rather do something that was easier. I have tried working out with friends before, but sometimes, when your friends aren't as serious about the exercise, your joint workouts can be counterproductive. My point: it's great having someone who can fill that role: exercise coach or trainer or workout buddy. I would encourage you to find anyone who can help you meet your goals.

    Best of luck!!Wink
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    I completely understand how you feel.  Between working full time and trying to plan the wedding- I am drained and the gym is the last thing on my mind.
    What I have done to help  is put a picture of my wedding dress so I can see it multiple times during the day and it keeps me motivated to lose the weight.

    I bet you are going to look amazing on your wedding day!  Good luck :)



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    Count calories. Exercise alone does not work that well for losing pounds, it's works more for toning. Go on a website like selfdietclub.com and log all your calories so you are eating a consistant amount every day (it will tell you how much to eat based on your height, weight, and how much you want to lose). It's annoying, but if you make it a habit (like getting on a site like this every day), it's much easier. It keeps you on track, and it works! You won't have to do it forever. Once you are maintaining you won't have to be quite so strict about it, but you might want to check in every once in a while.
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    I am very unmotivated right now! I still have 14 months until the wedding which I am happy about, but I can't help but keep thinking - what if I never get motivated? - I want to look my best for my FI.  I know he fell in love with me the way that I am, but I would still love to see myself shed some pounds. 
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    edited March 2010
    ugh i am so there with you lol except i want to lose 60lbs not 15! my FI & i had our dd last summer & i broke my tailbone & cracked a disc delivering her. i actually gained 15 more lbs after because i couldn't do anything & 8 months later can still barely move because of the injuries not healing properly. plus i'm probably the most unmotivated person ever lol i look at pics & i remember in highschool working out all the time & now i think i was nuts 'cause i was so skinny!

    i jus started using caloriecount.com & tells you what the calories are of whatever you ate that day & what calories you naturally burn in your daily life, what cals you need to eat to lose weight etc i put in what goal weight i wanted to hit & it said if i only lost 1-1.5 a wk i could before a year. so i'm sure you could lose 15lbs in a month or 2 if you really wanted to!

    i'd recommend pilates for dummies too. it's not that hard & when i used to do it only 3x a wk for 40 mins i saw immediate results.. 

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    I could really use like 25 pounds but I really want to set a realistic goal for myself.  I willstart with a goal of 15 to be healthier and then see where I go from there.  I know myself and taking off weight is difficult because of my thyroid but it is possible.   I on't want to set myself upfor disappointment because I set my goal too high
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    I agree completely, I am so unmotivated to get to the gym. I know I should but it's a lot easier to just keep sitting on that couch. So I decided that when I was watching a show I would use it to tone. Everytime I get up from the couch for any reason I do 5 push ups, then when I come back to the couch I do 5 just before I sit down.
    It takes out the motivation for me and I can interchange what workout I do. Like lunges or squats.

    It might help but hope everything goes well.
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    Dae27Dae27 member
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    Well I have 75+ pounds to lose. My wedding in Aug 2011. I  honesly have been tryng to lose this weight for the past 6 years, going up & down and I have never arrived at my goal. I have now signed up on  the Sparkpeople web site (www.sparkpeople.com) and It has been working so far for me.

    I now feel like I have a chance, a real chance to lose all those pound. And on ths site you'll meet other people who have gone through it and succeeded.

    Also there are teams for everything. I'm in a team called "2011 Brides to be". Other teams are "Done Being the Fat Girl". "Desperate for Desperate Housewives" and other fun stuff. Come and join and if you want we can buddy up.

    My user name is "DISTIME" so you can add me as a friend and we can encourage each other. Any one can joinLaughing
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    everyone has moments of being unmotivated - it's not a big deal.  when i first got engaged in april, i worked out every freaking day, weights, cardio, you name it...but that soon changed.  i got burned out in a matter of two weeks. 
    my wedding is creeping up very quickly (39 days to go!) and i just recently began the 30 day shred, but doing it every other day so I don't burn myself out and get unmotivated again... it's quick and the FI has already commented on some changes :)

    don't beat yourself up about it - it happens to all of us. just start off slowly and you'll do great!
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    I was unmotivated for several months after the engagement, but I started working out regularly in January, when I felt like it was crunch time.  (Our wedding is in October.)  I had been wanting to lose the 15lbs for years, but I put it off and told myself that I would be more motivated when I got engaged because I wanted to look awesome on my wedding day.  Now that the date is not an abstract time in the future, I have NO MORE EXCUSES!!  I figured that if I'm not going to get motivated now, I never will lose the weight.  I really want this for myself, not for my FI or anyone else.  I have not liked how I look in pictures for several years, and I want to be happy with my wedding photos, and I know I won't be unless I work really hard.  I haven't lost the pounds yet, but I have lost inches, and other people are noticing.  I also feel better mentally (no more guilt about being lazy) and physically.  I'm starting to focus more on cardio now, so hopefully the scale will start to move.  If you want your changes to last, you should make gradual lifestyle changes, rather than crash dieting and exercising for a couple months before the wedding.
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    i think having people in your life to help push you forward makes a huge difference. my best friend (who is also my MOH) and I both want to lose weight before the wedding. so she really helps keep me accountable. on days i don't feel like going to the gym, she (rather sternly and with many explicit words) reminds me i need to get to the gym. when i want to eat something i shouldn't she reminds me that nothing tastes as good as being healthy feels. find those people who love you and will help keep you accountable! :) it makes all the difference AND you can totally do this! 
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    so, you don't even need to exercise....I'm down 17 lbs in 5 weeks by eating 1,000 calories a day. Swear to God. Now, I have no personal discipline, so I am with Physicians Weight Loss Center and they keep me on track with a food journal, and b12 shots, etc....however if you just cut 500 calories out of your diet a day, DRINK WATER (or Crystal Light), and reduce your sodium intake....you should lose 1 to 2 pounds a week....if not more. It's been a little over a month and I'm already down a dress size, and I never even broke a sweat. You can drink diet sodas if you can't just drink water or crystal light, but the key is to cut back on the calories (portion size). It's really easy, I feel a lot better and sleep better too! No gimmicks, no diet plan, just good choices. That's it! And the weight will come off!
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    No one is motivated all the time.

    It's about building healthy habits.

    Start small, with tracking what you eat every day.

    Try new activities or DVDs until you find what you enjoy and can do consistently.

    Don't quit.

    It's okay to slack for a day or two here and there. It's okay to make poor food choices or skip a work out.

    Just keep getting back on track, and you WILL get there!
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    I think these are all great tip, and as I was reading I went to amazon and bought 30 day shred! My wedding is three months away and I haven't been motivated at all, my dress fits, so I feel like I dont have to work out... Until I started shopping for bathing suits today. I didnt even try any on and I was freaking out about not wanting to wear them in front of people. My FI told me that if I feel that way either get over it or do something about it! He was right, I'm going to kick my a$$ in to shape! I'm a certified personal trainer for crying out loud! There is one thing I have to say though... someone mentioned that they are eating only a 1,000 cals/day, don't do that! Your body needs at least 1,200 cals a day to fuction... so keep it between that and 1,500 if you can and exercise too. It takes a loss of 3,500 calories a week to lose one pound! So, eating 3,500 less and losing an additional 3,500 through excercise would be ideal. Also, thedailyplate.com is a great way to keep track of what you eat. I used to work out 2 1/2 hours every other day and using an exercise journal really helped. Thanks for helping to get me motivated ladies!
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    The thing that bothers me the most is that most everyone on here is doing this for their wedding day. What happens after the wedding ? I guess I just don't understand not wanting to be healthy.  Now don't get me wrong, there are plenty of days I come home and veg, but I just can't imagine a life where I eat too much, am always tired, and unsatisfied with myself.  I work out and eat healthy because I want to feel good.  Another thing to remember is that now it's not just for you, its for your partner.  
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    I have also been very unmotivated recently... I'm finishing up school, student teaching, looking for a new house or apartment, and getting my teacher's license, all while planning my wedding. I am exhausted when I get home so I usually just end up on the couch correcting papers and watching TV instead of going to work out. Because of this board, I talked FI into going to work out with me tonight and I finally remembered how great I feel when I'm done! Now I just need to make it a habit!

    Just think about the rewards of working out and how great you feel and, hopefully, that might help! GL!
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    My wedding is July 31st, so I have a good 5 months of holding myself accountable to looking phenomenal in my dress. My MOH and I agreed to exercise 30 minutes every day. We email each other what we did. It works great because as much as I want to look great in my dress, I don't want to disappoint my friend even more.

    Exercise with a friend whether it be short or long distance. Just remember that all they can see are your arms and shoulders!
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    I was the same way with the whole wedding planning thing. Not just with just losing wait. My wedding is now 53 days away, but it still hasn't clicked in that I'm getting married. But maybe it will the closer the day gets here.
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