Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

Declaration of Intent (Kinda Long)

Hi everyone, I am new to this board.  I am getting married on July 23, 2011 only 87 more days.  We are trying to finalize our ceremony.  I come from a baptist background and my pastor is old-school.  He wants our declaration of intent to say the following:

"_______ & _________: Having been led by the Spirit of God to receive the Lord Jesus Chrssit into your hearts, do you now, in the presence of God and this assembly, enter into agreement with one another to: live together patiently, upholding one another in love ... (looking at the groom) to love your wife as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for her ... (looking at the bride) to submit to (or respect) your husband, as the Word of God teaches ... (looking at both) to seek God's help in adapting yourselves with regard to like and dislikes, to pray over your problems together, be neither angry, violent or quarrelsome, but gentle, considerate and forgiving, accept the importance of daily, private and family devotions of prayer and Bible reading, maintain a Godly atmosphere in the home permitting only such things as are honoring to the Lord, realize that God can use your testimony to bring your unsaved friends to Christ, and forsaking all others, keep to one another in love, so long as you both shall live?"  (Answer: I do)

My FI and I are Christians, attend church every Sunday and have a good faith foundation, but we do NOT like the whole wife submit to your husband thing, which comes from Ephesians.  We believe that that passage is trying to say there should be mutual submission between a husband and wife.  Anyways we would like our declaration of faith to portray mututal submission, not just the wife submitting to the husband.  TIA Ladies! :)
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Re: Declaration of Intent (Kinda Long)

  • edited December 2011
      I agree! The one thing I told my FI I refuse to say when it comes to my vows is Obey.
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  • bballgirl8789bballgirl8789 member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Haha same here!  We have both agreed that we don't want me saying obey, submit or respect unless we're both saying respect or submit.  My Pastor on the other hand has other ideas, haha.
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  • edited December 2011
    what bugs me is that the verse that it comes from says the husband should respect his wife. IT IS MUTUAL IN THE BIBLE... okay off my soap box... I just wish pastors and whomever would get that when they write it up...
  • Heather8505Heather8505 member
    edited December 2011
    Isn't that the part where people change it to "keep"?  Would that work for you?
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="">Re: Declaration of Intent (Kinda Long)</a>:
    [QUOTE]Isn't that the part where people change it to "keep"?  Would that work for you?
    Posted by Heather8505[/QUOTE]
  • mandi921vhmandi921vh member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Sounds good to me!
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  • edited December 2011
    I am having the obey fight with our minister now. He honestly told us that its a sin not to follow the Ephisians model..... These are way better than what he offered us! Ant other suggestions?
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