Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
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"Honeymoon Dance" (money dance) feelings....

What are your feelings in regards to the "tradition"? I know many brides are cutting it out b/c they feel it inappropriate to "ask for money" from their guests while other see it as just purely "just for fun."

Re: "Honeymoon Dance" (money dance) feelings....

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    edited December 2011
    I think some people are way ,for a lack of a better word, anal , about not having these or thinking it's bad. I think it depends on your crowd, and it's not that big of a deal if your guests are into it.

    In my culture, we do something like this in reverse. We have a knife dance, where before we cut our cake, the single ladies come steal the "cake knife" from us and do a traditional dance with it and tease us by pretending to give the knife back if we give them some money. Instead, they take the money and give the knife to the next lady, and they do they same thing ( dances , teases to give the knife back). Then after about 5 or 6 short dances, the last one finally gives us the knife and we get to cut our cake.
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    edited December 2011
    it is a huge tradition where i'm from and i've been asked like a million times if we are having it and how they can't wait! it is just fun and people only need to give $1!!!! to me that is not asking for money. they don't have to dance if they don't want to!
    at my cousin's wedding, i keep collecting money from those that didn't feel like dancing, but wanted to give him something, just so i could keep dancing with him!!!
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    edited December 2011

    I've been to a lot of weddings where this was done and I didn't mind it or frown upon it at all. I just personally didn't want to do it. Aaron's aunt brought pins and told the DJ to get it started, but he checked with me first and I said no. I didn't want pins all over my dress and I didn't want to have people pull out money.

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    cfibelkorncfibelkorn member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You dont have an "other" option but that is what I would choose and here is why:

    I do not think it is inappropriate at all, I have a honeymoon registry, I just think it would be awkward....like your a stripper or something haha It seems a little trashy TO ME to have people sticking money on you while you dance

    If you don't feel uncomfortable then who cares what anyone else thinks.

    I know alot of people on this website say HM registries are poor ettique but my friends and family are responding well the it and donating towards our honeymoon :)
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    edited December 2011
    I think it depends on your crowd.  For my cousin's wedding they did it (but put the money in a bag, not pinned to their clothes). 

    For a friend's wedding, they did something like it, but not with money.  Cards were handed out, where we wrote down advice and then we turned in the cards for a dance with the bride/groom.
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    edited December 2011
    i would NOT do the pin on!!!!
    we usually have someone (usually a bridesmaid) that has a cute little basket or pouch for people to hand her the money before they come dance with us.
    i've never had it called the honeymoon dance though... usually the money for the money dance is just presents.
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    edited December 2011
    In my dad's family, the wedding gifts were given at the bridal shower, and on the wedding day itself, nothing but envelopes were given.  His family is Italian, and that's just the tradition that I've seen at each of the Caruso/? weddings. 
    I don't know what we're going to do concerning that...I still don't even have an idea of what we're doing for the wedding...since it's all at a standstill.
    I don't think it's "tacky"...the idea came from somewhere...and to some it's customary to do that.  I agree with PP, that the success of doing it would really depend on your guests...
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    stephl3055stephl3055 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm assuming this is the same as a dollar dance?  I've never been to a wedding with one, so I might think it was a bit odd if I wasn't used to it.  I actually had never heard of one before I came to the Knot.  But if it's common in your community or the people that you are inviting, then I would think it's okay. 
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    edited December 2011
    It's not a big tradition with anyone in my family. FI and I aren't a huge fan of the concept. I've never actually been to a wedding and seen one for myself though.

    We went to a wedding last summer where instead of registering, the couple put on the invitation that they were going to have a "wishing well", essentially where people could give them cash. FI and I both thought that was a little tacky.

    But, everyone has the right to their opinions and preferences. I would never do anything to make people feel like they were obligated to give us money or a gift. I didn't want a shower (but, FMIL and my co-workers insisted on it), and we aren't putting anything about our registries on our invitations. It's all word of mouth, so that way only people who WANT to buy us something, can.
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    edited December 2011

    I don't frown on anyone who does it, but I wouldn't do it myself.   We danced with a TON of our guests anyway.

    I've seen it done twice, and as a guest I find it awkward...but that's just me.

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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_honeymoon-dance-money-dance-feelings?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:102Discussion:476d6542-e1f9-4964-85d8-9d1cbef02744Post:6b4c3922-8656-4a93-9b8c-6d010f8210ea">Re: "Honeymoon Dance" (money dance) feelings....</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't frown on anyone who does it, but I wouldn't do it myself.   We danced with a TON of our guests anyway. I've seen it done twice, and as a guest I find it awkward...but that's just me.
    Posted by Tiffany618[/QUOTE]
    Agree about it being awkward.  I went to a wedding where this was done.  I had no clue what was going on and then I realized people were giving money to dance with the bride and groom.  I thought it was kind of ridiculous.  Also, I don't carry cash on me so therefore I wouldn't be able to participate...not that I'd really want to anyway.  Chances are I've already bought you a gift and driven whereever your wedding is...  IDK.  But like others have said, if it's a tradition in your circle then by all means...  I just didn't do it for mine.
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    edited December 2011
    I don't plan on doing a 'dollar dance'.  I have seen lots of them.  It's just not my cup of tea.  But, if you want to do it - I say go for it. 
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    edited December 2011
    This was actually a huge thing when I was in NE I got a lot of shocked looks when I said I most likely wouldnt have one so I still wasnt sure but it doesnt seem to be as big of a deal down here so I am sticking with the idea of not doing it.  I dont love them at the weddings I have been to but I dont hate them either.  FI is NOT a dancer he doesnt even love the idea of a first dance and a mother son dance and I dont want him to not be comfortable at our wedding by being told when to dance with someone and my guests can dance with me for free if they want to.
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    edited December 2011
    Growing up, I never went to a wedding that didn't have a dollar dance. When you gave the $1 to someone, they offered you a choice of a giant-sized Hershey bar or a shot of some liquor for that dollar. (The weddings were usually open bar anyway, so this was just kind of fun). Of course, as a kid, I never got the choice, but I do remember those enormous candy bars!

    But now I'm in a completely different geographical area so I don't know the crowd. And after reading some of the message boards here ... I told some family members recently we weren't doing it, and they protested loudly.

    But now I'm toying with the idea of just eliminating the money aspect. I really like the idea of having that one dance where people are encouraged to cut in and dance with the B&G. We don't want the money, just the chance to dance with our relatives who might be too shy to cut in unless it was particularly encouraged for that one song.
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