The Shower Budget

JennyLynne

This would be my first time throwing a bridal shower.  The bridal party is 2 bridesmaids (I'm one of them) and the Maid of Honor who lives out of state & won't be able to attend the shower. So a few months ago the bride says to me, "Since MOH lives out of state, you'll have to do my shower". I'm okay with that, but budget-wise its going to be tight for me. I don't know the other bridesmaid at all and have only met the MOH once. Since the MOH lives out of state, should I still ask if she wants to contribute? I guess I'll have to send a message to the other BM via facebook and see if she wants to get involved. 
Any budget-friendly ideas that you can think of in case I end up doing the whole thing myself? I still want to make this a fun and classy thing for my bride without having it look cheap.

MairePoppy

You should get in touch with the other members of the bridal party to find out if and how much they want to contribute. Get their phone numbers from the bride, rather than post on facebook. Since the wedding party is small, you should keep the guest list small also (25 people or less). Serve finger foods and punch. Don't spend more than you can afford.

By the way, a shower is not an entitlement and the bride should not have asked for one.

trix1223

The bride was rude.  If you can't handle it, tell her you can't.  She doesn't have to have a shower to get married, after all.

But....my DD's shower was low-key, lovely, and exactly what she wanted.  Total guest list:  about 19.  Each BM brought a favorite dessert and bottle of wine.  I provided a fruit and cheese platter and strawberry lemonade as well as paper products.  Her MIL also provided a dessert and favors.

Total cost for each BM:  cost of the dessert and bottle of wine. 

A shower doesn't have to be huge and expensive to be wonderful.

cukimerrydoll

My cousin threw one a few months ago at her house.  It was very low-key, and since it was at her house, the venue was free. 

When we've thrown them, it's been a lot of finger-foods, punch, and wine.  Easy, low key.  The only thing we really worried about was having enough chairs, so we just moved them from some of the other rooms in the house.

I think the total cost of what we've thrown is iess than $100.  If you can find a place to have it, you should be fine.  And the MOB or MOG might be willing to contribute for desserts and what-not.

danieliza1127

I would start by contacting the MOH and other BM.  Let them know that the bride asked you to throw her a shower (which is tacky by the way) and that before you got started trying to plan something, you wanted to know whether they would like to be involved in the planning and/or contribute financially.  If so, what would they like to help out with and/or how much would they like to contribute. 

From there, you'll know what you're working with. 

If it turns out that you are in it on your own, plan what you can afford.  Don't be afraid to speak up for yourself.  You will have to let the bride know that you can only afford what you can afford, which means you'll have to tell her how many guests you can afford to host and she'll need to keep her guest list to that number.

It's totally fine to do just cake and punch if that's all you can do.  Maybe if your house isn't big enough for it, you could ask the bride to help you find a relative or someone who wouldn't mind using their house.

Cray.anita

In my circle it is very common to have cake and punch showers with no other type of food.  They are usually held at a church hall at 2:00pm or so.  Hopefully the other girls will be willing to pitch in some!