Pre-wedding Parties

My sister's bridal shower

My sister is getting married in June - As MOH, I'm planning her shower for May. 

I live in Florida, She lives in Pennsylvania.   Bridal showers in the south typically include gifts from a registry and/or lingerie gifts.   She is not planning on registering for gifts because she wants cash donations to help fix up her house and for the honeymoon.  She is expecting lingerie gifts at the shower and cash donations at the wedding.   What can I do on the invitations to indicate lingerie gifts and/or cash donations without coming across in a bad way. 

Thoughts? Suggestions.
Many Thanks.

Re: My sister's bridal shower

  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    You can't.  If she chooses not to register, she takes her chances on getting a lovely, crocheted toilet paper cover.

    But you can't tell people that they have to give cash and/or lingerie.  IMO, cash is never appropriate for a shower.  And I would never, ever buy someone lingerie.  It's just too personal and would be uncomfortable for me.

    I'd adivse your sister to register for at least some things that she wants~upgrades to what she has now, or even registering at Lowe's or Home Depot for things that will help in the house repairs.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Why have a shower if she just wants cash?

    She should definitely register if she doesn't want an alligator lamp.  And you could throw a lingerie shower, but those can get kind of awkward if Grandma and Aunt Erminitrude are there.  It would also be weird to ask about sizes, etc.
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  • edited December 2011
    If she doesn't want gifts, she shouldn't be having a shower. Showers are for gifts, not cash.
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  • edited December 2011
    I agree with the the pp's. Your sister takes a risk of getting a bunch of stuff she does not want by not registering. I know I always give a gift off the registry for the shower and money for the wedding. Most of my family does this as well. You can spread the word when people ask where she is registered that they are saving for a specific item for the house. But other than that, your hands are kinda tied by etiquette.
  • MeganONealMeganONeal member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I am in the process of helping plan a similar type of bridal shower. The way we are wording it on the invite to specify lingerie is... "All About the Bride"/Pampering themed shower w/ gifts such as spa gift certificates, hair, nails, lingerie, undies, etc.

  • AHorton84AHorton84 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Sorry to be posting kind of late... My bridal shower last year was also a lingerie shower.  It wasn't written anywhere on the invitation, since that is kind of tricky to word.  Instead, on the Victoria's Secret website you can create a gift list that people can purchase from.  My MOH just included a little slip with the registry information and people got the point.  And no one, even the super conservative Catholic mothers, got offended.  The type of lingerie some of the mothers bought was actually quite surprising!
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