Bridal Mortgage Registry

JennScott25

my FI is really against registering for gifts and is considering just telling people we would like money so we can use it for a down payment.  most of the family know we have been talking about a house for a whle now, but i still feel that people without the cash to give would feel uncomfortable.  i think we should have at least 1 registry for those who can not afford cash to give.  is it tacky to set up a bridal mortgage registry or savings account for wedding gifts?  do people really do this?

banana468

I don't know of anyone who would do this.People who want to give you money will give you money.  IMO, register at a department store or store like BB&B for those who want to give you gifts.Plus, not wanting gifts means declining a shower if someone offers.

duckie1905

You don't tell people what to buy you. I find it funny that your FI is "against" registering for gifts but he is perfectly okay telling people to give money. It is very tacky to set up a bridal mortgage registry or savings account for your guests to "donate" to. If I were attending the wedding and this was the only option I was given, I would give you the ugliest present I could find and be sure that you couldn't return it. If you want money then don't register and have your families (not you) inform people that ask. But, like the previous pp said, you must decline any shower requests if you don't want presents and are only asking for cash. Plus, you must be prepared that people will not give you money and you'll end up with lots of crap you don't need and may not be able to return/exchange. Your best bet is to register for upgrades if you don't need any new items.

lsgarver

That is a terrible idea.  Please don't do it. 

JennScott25

Thank you everyone.  I am going to BB&B to register for items that we could always use and for upgrades to the items we already have.  His take on the whole situtaution is that he doesn't want people to buy something that we really don't need and if they were going to spend money on something might as well be something we need.  I can understand that, but on the other hand, I don't want someone to feel like we are ungrateful and don't want a gift, just their money.  At first he just wanted to tell people not to buy or bring anything and we just wanted their company, which is exactly true, but i feel that would back fire and make people feel more uncomfortable.  gifts are never expected or required, but it's the norm and something that is just done.  so, we decided that if someone would ask what we want to let them know that we only registered for a few items at BB&B because we are looking to get a house soon after we are married .  they can take it from there.  thanks again for confirming what i had felt.  that a mortgage registry was not done and tacky.

TaterNpA

A friend of mine got an invitation with the registry information separate, of course, but the registries listed were mortgage and paypal. So I guess it is done...