Registry and Gift Forum

Why is Registry Info Okay on the Website?

Hello all,

I'm new to posting on the boards, hoping for some of the famous Knottie honesty!

I'm getting married in June: the wedding is in Canada, the groom and his family are Canadian, while I'm from the States. We have one registry in a US store, and two in Canadian stores (one local, and one which is a Canadian version of a US chain). I've heard that it is considered appropriate to put one's registry information on one's wedding website, but I don't understand the logic as to why (I understand fully why the invitation inserts/printing it on cards/etc. is considered tacky!).

The time has come when people have been asking me about where I'm registered ("really?" I want to ask them, "this early?"), and I'm a bit weary, three times in, of sending e-mails explaining, "yes, Pottery Barn, but not that Pottery Barn, the other, Canadian Pottery Barn." I had a long phone conversation with my MOH yesterday, in which she told me that "nobody cares about that etiquette anymore," but I HATE that excuse for things!

So, what do you think? Do I get over myself (admittedly a frequent requirement) and put it on the website, or do I flee the temptation?

Thank you! Apologies for the many parentheses; I'm a grad student.
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Re: Why is Registry Info Okay on the Website?

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    Things like this are all about how you handle them. If your registry info is right on the front page of the website staring you in the face, it is pretty tacky.

    However, websites are meant for helpful info. Yes, we all like to look at cute photos and who is in the wedding party that we can set our single girlfriends up with, BUT it is really meant as a tool for your guests. Things like directions, accomodations and rules of dress for the venue you are having your reception at can be a big help to inquiring minds. Similarly with registry info. Placing a discreet link to a seperate page with your registry info on it serves a similar purpose.
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    Thank you! I'm also a bit of a dork... I just found the discussion of this on the next page down. Should have looked a bit further before harassing you all. Oh well, lessons in humility...

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    I have absolutely no clue why it is ok to put it on the website.  Maybe that it's less "in your face?"  The logic is lost on me too.  I wasn't comfortable with it, so we didn't, but our registries were at the typical US stores, and most of our guests were in the US (and most knew where we went without having to ask).  If you are comfortable with it, go ahead and do it.  I'm sure it would make things easier.

    The logic in putting it in the actual invitiation is that it implies that a gift is required or expected.  Even though most people give wedding gifts (and birthday and Christmas gifts) you still shouldn't act like you are expecting one.  It's sort of like your birthday with grandma.  Sure, you know she's going to get you something, and she'd probably like some ideas, but you're not going to call her with a list of what you want, you wait until she asks what you'd like. 

    But traditional etiquette is alive and well.  There are some things that have changed or relaxed, but for the most part, people do still stick to etiquette and will be offended or put off if you ignore it. 
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    I think the distinction, for me, is that if you put it on the invitation, the guest doesn't have the option of avoiding it.  It's right there, in their face, whether they wanted to send a gift or not.  On a website, the guest is likely specifically going there with the intent of finding your registry to buy you a gift, and it's not mandatory viewing material for all guests.

    That's how I see it, anyway.
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    Can you just tell people who live in the US the US store, and those who live in Canada the Canadian store?  If you put it on your website, you can always say "We are registered at Pottery Barn and Local Store in Canada, and Macy's in the U.S."
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    Unfortunately, we weren't that organized! We registered at the US for kitchen stuff like pots and pans, because the prices were just appalingly high in Canada (considering the dollars are now at parity)--and because we could do it online, and we were tired of pushy registry salesladies. The majority of our stuff is registered in Canada, and we want to give people on both sides of the border as many price options as possible-- I've had a few experiences of not finding anything on a registry in my price range.

    I ended up adding it, but as discretely as possible at the bottom of the information page, so it's not up in anybody's face. I hope it passes muster!
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    I think that is a very good place for it, and the guests who are looking for it will see it.
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    I personally think the website is questionable, though not anywhere near as bad as the invitation. In your case, if the registries are really confusing, put them on the website on a separate page from everything else. Just list the registries, don't link to anything.
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    Maybe because as a PP said, it's not so in your face as inserts in the invite. Here is one way to think about it too--people can CHOOSE to go to your website to view pictures, stories, helpful info.  People HAVE to open the invite to be able to view the invite and respond. So maybe because you can have the info on website and people are not obligated to look at that information?  I don't know. 
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    I think it's fine to put the registry information on one's website because no one has to look there.....and it's really a place for information.  We're getting married in about a year and we've been engaged since 11/09....I can say I've been called, asked, and emailed at least 50-70 times about where I'm registered (starting at about 4 days after our engagement was announced).  I have a very generous family who started sending engagement gifts about a month ago and I have found having my registry info so available and easy to access to have helped people a lot.  I know it's early to register I just plan on checking on things weekly to ensure everything is going okay and to adjust as needed.  If you're comfortable with it on your website I'd say go for it......if you aren't it isn't something that everyone needs to have up there on it.

    =) My website
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    Yeah, see, I was so settled on it and wrote that long post, and then my fiance overruled me. "The only place I've ever found registries was people's websites, and ours is confusing" he said. So it's settled, no point having a big fight about something on which there's (generally) consensus that it can be tastefully done.

    I'm still wondering about that subconscious-beaming thing, though...
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    In Response to <a href="">Re: Why is Registry Info Okay on the Website?</a>:
    [QUOTE]done. I'm still wondering about that subconscious-beaming thing, though...
    Posted by Morfudd[/QUOTE]

    Yeah.... I am, too...
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    MorfuddMorfudd member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited January 2010
    Oh, dear. It was a joke. Please don't think I'm entirely out of my mind, indecisive as I may be.

    (The mind-beaming thing, not the entire post.)
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