Registry and Gift Forum

"Going in together"

Has anyone ever "gone in with someone" to buy a gift for a wedding?

I see a lot of posts about people who worry about price, or think maybe 4 people will get together to buy them a TV.  But does it really happen?

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Re: "Going in together"

  • When I was just out of college, a friend and I purchased a placesetting for a friend's wedding together.

    I haven't done it since then. I do know I could see a group of co-workers going in on one gift. My cousins (same parents) who are all in their 20's bought my H and I a bunch of random stuff off our registry as a group gift.
  • Yep. I've seen bridesmaids get a more expensive group gift, coworkers, siblings, parents + siblings, etc. For our E party we had three different groups of family members get together to buy a gift.
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  • My sister and I do it all of the time.  Together we can get a really nice gift as opposed to 2 ok gifts.
     
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  • Happened to us.  We didn't register for a TV but my H's house was broken into right before the wedding and the TV was stolen.  Several couples went in together and got us a GC to Best Buy and wrote in the card that it was to replace the TV.  =-)
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
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  • Yes, my one boss had two children whose weddings fell during the same year and I went in together with the housekeeper (with whom I was acquainted because my boss's office was based out of her home) on both gifts so we were able to get something nicer off the registry instead of each of us scrounging for something less expensive.
    Whoever said it was supposed to be happily ever after is a big fat liar.
  • I see this more for showers - I have often gone in with 1 or more people for a shower gift. 
  • I haven't done it myself, but I've watched friends do it for mutual friends' weddings.
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I've done this with my sister on several occassions.  She and I have a lot of mutual friends, so it makes sense when our mutual friends get married.
  • I did this just a few months ago for a friends wedding. I got together with 3 mutual friends and we all chipped in for the place settings she wanted. Also, I have 2 sisters, so there's been a few family bridal showers where the 3 of us have pooled money with our mother to get something nicer, instead of us each buying one of the less expensive gifts.

    *I felt sorry for my husband before I met him. Take a number.*
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  • We do this with siblings all the time. It's a great way to get a big ticket item we know the B&G will really enjoy and appreciate. And we had several guests give us gifts this way when we got married. It's perfectly lovely.
  • H, SIL, and I went in on a pot and pan set for a wedding shower gift.  At my own shower, there were a couple "group gifts".  It happens.
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  • This is very common in my family. We are actually pushed toward putting more expensive things on our registry because often aunts, and cousins will go in on them together. 

    June 16, 2012
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  • FI and I went in with another couple to buy our good friend's their entire silverware set (they needed it desperately).  FI and I then got them a small little something extra just from us.  The couple was thrilled.
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  • It's very common to do a "group gift" in my circle. In fact, a few of the showers I've been to recently included an option to mail a check back with my RSVP if you wanted to contribute a certain low amount to the group gift. Since the people invited were close friends, no one was offended by that - but for other groups this could have been less well received.
    To sum up: there's nothing strange/wrong about going in together on a gift!
  • A group of my friends all got us a tent off our registry.  

  • Mrs.B6302007Mrs.B6302007 member
    5000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_going-together?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:f5e6864d-09da-4566-abbf-594a55d902f2Post:4d876836-a374-4018-878f-d5699af76bc9">Re: "Going in together"</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's very common to do a "group gift" in my circle. In fact, a few of the showers I've been to recently included an option to mail a check back with my RSVP if you wanted to contribute a certain low amount to the group gift. Since the people invited were close friends, no one was offended by that - but for other groups this could have been less well received. To sum up: there's nothing strange/wrong about going in together on a gift!
    Posted by cebrady89[/QUOTE]


    What??

     I have been contacted in person/on the phone a few times by friends of the BTB/MTB who wanted to know if I wanted to go in on a group gift AFTER we had all received the invitations.  But close friends or not, I would  definitely make this face o_0  if I received an invitation that had a "mail a check" option.
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    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

    BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
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  • My mom and I (and my grandma if she is invited) usually go together to get a bigger item.

    My MOHs and their moms went together at my shower to get us a wine fridge and basket of wine, and a family we are friends with went together and got us a bunch of place settings for our china.
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  • My friends J and E went in together to purchse the pots/pans set for my wedding.  E and I then went in together to purchase all of J's dishes for her wedding.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_going-together?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:f5e6864d-09da-4566-abbf-594a55d902f2Post:4d876836-a374-4018-878f-d5699af76bc9">Re: "Going in together"</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's very common to do a "group gift" in my circle. <strong>In fact, a few of the showers I've been to recently included an option to mail a check back with my RSVP if you wanted to contribute a certain low amount to the group gift. </strong>Since the people invited were close friends, no one was offended by that - but for other groups this could have been less well received. To sum up: there's nothing strange/wrong about going in together on a gift!
    Posted by cebrady89[/QUOTE]

    My friends and I often go in together for gifts for many reasons listed above. I have never encountered a situation in bold. I honestly don't know what I would do if I saw that in an RSVP. I get a may be common with your group, but those of us going in on a gift talk, we don't just send in money with our RSVP.
  • I do it with my mom all the time. Especially when I was in college & was broke, I'd give my mom would I could & she'd add it to get a bigger gift.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_going-together?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:f5e6864d-09da-4566-abbf-594a55d902f2Post:4d876836-a374-4018-878f-d5699af76bc9">Re: "Going in together"</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's very common to do a "group gift" in my circle. In fact, a few of the showers I've been to recently included an option to mail a check back with my RSVP if you wanted to contribute a certain low amount to the group gift. <strong>Since the people invited were close friends, no one was offended by that</strong> - <strong><em>but for other groups this could have been less well received</em></strong>. To sum up: there's nothing strange/wrong about going in together on a gift!
    Posted by cebrady89[/QUOTE]

    <div>Trust me, I know this isn't something everyone would do. </div><div>
    </div><div>These particular showers were hosted by the same group of people, and the guest list was basically made up of a small group of close friends. They'd all talked about doing a group gift prior to the shower (and had gone in together on gifts for past showers), and this became a much simpler way to contribute toward it. </div><div>
    </div><div>Certainly, you wouldn't do this sort of thing for large showers where people aren't close or aren't accustomed to it - just using this example to show that group gifts are totally fine!</div>
  • My family regularly does group gifts. There haven't been any family weddings in the time I've been an adult (last cousin got married early my senior year of high school) so I've always been included with my parents. But they often go in on something with my aunt, or my grandparents when they were still alive. I know when I started registering my parents encouraged us to have a few big ticket items for these group gift situations.
  • Thank you.  I love the response on here.
    I personally have never done it, but I see the idea of it often on here. 
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    Just because you saw it on Four Weddings, doesn't mean it's a good idea.
  • Yes, all the time.  My aunts (3 of them) often go together get something larger.  And I have done it with friends, esp before I was out of college.
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