Moms and Maids
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Bridesmaid Blues

Am I the only one who is having trouble picking bridesmaids? I have two so far (not counting the flower girl or junior bridesmaid - both being my daughters) and have considered two other girls but I am not really close to either. Thoughts, suggestions or opinions??

Re: Bridesmaid Blues

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    edited December 2011
    Only your nearest and dearest should stand up for you on your special day. Who would you call if you had a problem at 2am? Would you call one of the girls you are considering asking? If not, I would just leave it at the two you already have.
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    solemnlyswearsolemnlyswear member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_bridesmaid-blues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:062daf29-07e8-4e87-a9bb-30cae88c09c3Post:93081272-42a8-42a3-99ea-e059519b33a4">Re: Bridesmaid Blues</a>:
    [QUOTE]Only your nearest and dearest should stand up for you on your special day. Who would you call if you had a problem at 2am? Would you call one of the girls you are considering asking? If not, I would just leave it at the two you already have.
    Posted by MissySue20[/QUOTE]
    <p> </p><p>My thoughts exactly, there is no set number of BM that you have to have. </p>
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    stockholm08stockholm08 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    So far the girls I'm having are the spouses of the groomsmen. My brother is a groomsmen and I have considered asking my sister in law but we aren't super close. I'm sure she would be there for me if I needed. I know this shouldn't matter but if all of them are couples EXCEPT my SIL, wouldn't that look that she was excluded? 
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    aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Are you close to the spouses of the groomsmen, or are they just included to be couples?
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    stockholm08stockholm08 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    One of the groomsmen and one of the bridesmaids are married and they are what you would consider our BF's. The other groomsmen and my other bridesmaid are long time friends of my hubby to be and I am having her as a bridesmaid because I know it means a lot to him. I am trying hard to not to pick people to "be balanced" or because it would be nice. I just think that it would be nice to have more than one close girlfriend to surround me and share in this experience with me. My first wedding I only had my SIL as a matron of honor and no one else because I didn't want to deal with girl drama. Needless to say, it was very lonely getting ready alone, etc. I have many good girlfriends but no super close, confide everything to friends. Make sense?
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    aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You can invite people to get ready with you without asking them to be bridesmaids.  I wouldn't ask the second girl if you haven't already.  (If you have, you're kind of stuck with her.)  WP really should only be your absolute nearest and dearest.  You can also ask any guy friends if they fit that criteria.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    graysquirrelgraysquirrel member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Totally agree with pps. Ask people you are close to. It is ok to have a small WP if that is what you end up with. I would say that if there is someone that you would really want in the changing room with you, pumping you up and ready with a tissue, then make her a BM. If not, then leave it small. 
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    edited December 2011
    My best advise, something I wish I would have done is wait to decide. I wish I would have waited until the 5 month mark to pick my BM. Friendships change and sometimes they change quick. It's nothing really personal, I just wish I would have considered waiting to choose. But dont pick someone just to fill a spot. I think your two daughters would be perfect just them.
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    mandi921vhmandi921vh member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You pick your closest friends, you don't need a specific number of people in your WP. 
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    KateG528KateG528 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    There is nothing wrong with having only a small number of attendants. I have my MOH (my sister) and my 2 bridesmaids, (my best friend and my cousin I grew up with). I dont have that many close girl friends my age, so I am just having 3 attendants. 
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    csousa1csousa1 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    When my mom and adoptive dad got married (both second marriage) my sister and I were my mother's bridal party. We were 10 and 8 at the time. It was fun getting ready just the three of us, getting excited about starting this new family (even though it wasn't really new, they had been engaged for about 6 years :) ) My dad's groomsmen were my 10 and 8 year old cousins, the closest thing to I have to brothers. Bottom line is there are no rules, you should do what you feel is right and will make you happy :) Even if you only had your daughters, you would have a blast getting ready!
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    edited December 2011
    I am not incredible close with my FSIL but I asked her because my fiances brother is the best man and I thought it would fun to have her included I havent regreted it I think its helping us to become closer
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