Moms and Maids

MOB gift - what would you prefer?

I am making coasters for my mom(as part of a thank you gift for helping with the wedding and just being there in general) and can't decide if I should do pictures of her kids or some of her favorite things like color, flowers, etc. The hang up for me is that her oldest hardly ever initiates contact including not calling on mothers day, birthdays or even christmas and stuff like that. I haven't seen him in 2 years myself and am pretty bitter towards him for treating my mom like this(it's not a recent development either it's always been this way with him). He tends to only call when he's in trouble or needs something. With that said she of course still loves him but is hurt by his actions. I don't have a recent picture of him and there is no way I could get one. It took like a month just to get his address to send an invitation to. With that said, would you rather have a set of coasters with some semblance of all 4 kids even though his pic will be older, the 3 kids who still care(I'm not bitter :p) or just some cute ones that reflect you as a person and not as a mom.Also if you choose the kids route would you rather it be just the kids or would you mind if like my FI were included or other spouses? I know there is always the "what if they break up" so while I think it's a great thought, I'm not sure if it's a good idea or not.

Re: MOB gift - what would you prefer?

  • edited December 2011
    As a mom I would rather not set drinks down on my kids faces.  I happen to have a plan to do a thing with all three of my kids at age 5.  They are very far apart in age.  But I'm gonna hang it on the wall.  i would try to go with her decor for coasters.
  • appletango85appletango85 member
    edited December 2011
    LOL! I'm sorry but the way you said that made me literally laugh out loud. That doesn't cause suspicion at work at all...Didn't even think about that so thanks!
  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    A mom here.  I'd skip the coasters as well.  What about something like this:Get a double photo frame.  On one side put a picture of you and your mom at a special time in your life:  when you were a newborn; your first day of kindergarten; your first communion; a graduation.  You get the idea.On the other side, put a note saying that side is reserved for a picture of the two of you on your wedding day.  And then have the photographer be sure to get a wonderful picture of you both.  (If you prefer, have it a picture of you, your new DH, and mom)As a mom, that would be personal to you, and meaningful.Having said that, my DD gave me beautiful earrings and necklace last month, and I've pretty much been wearing them non-stop.Your wedding day is a day for you and your mom. I don't think a gift needs to include your siblings.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • mbjinesmbjines member
    edited December 2011
    Thats such a great idea- the double picture frame!!
  • edited December 2011
    I'm not really qualified for this, because my MOB gift is that my daughter allowed me to choose two Bruce Springsteen songs to be played at the reception! So for what it's worth, I'd go for the double frame too. The coasters are a really cute idea, and handmade is always wonderful. If you stick with the coasters, can you find little things to put on them that represent things you did together for the wedding? And, I agree, this is for you and your mom. No siblings allowed. Especially rotten ones :-) have a gorgeous wedding!
  • dianenjnjdianenjnj member
    Knottie Warrior 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    why not wait until the wedding and have some nice family picts taken w the black sheep brother and gift a couple to her.don't like the coaster idea...sounds cheap...sorry.
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