Pregnant Bridesmaid

lacis

So I have a dilemma. I am not complaining about her being pregnant, lets make that clear right now.

I asked all my bridesmaids to have their dresses ordered by the first of February (the wedding in June 3rd). I get a facebook message from one of the girls whos pregnant saying she didn't order because she doesn't know what to do. She is due in April, so baby will be here befire the wedding and everything.  She doesn't know what size to order because she doesn't know how big she will be, She wants to wait until closer to the wedding to order. Meanwhile my dress shop keeps calling asking when she is going ot order and telling me that if she doesn't order really soon they will have to charge a rush fee, which really isn't fair to her, but at the same time is fair because thats how business goes. All the girls who have their dresses ordered have an excpected delivery of mid-march. All of the others have ordered so I can't change the dress at this point. I don't know what to have her do, if I asked her not to be a bridesmaid she would be devestated. I want her to order her dress now so she won't have to pay the extra money, but understand her concerns as well. Advice please? Thanks

aerinpegadrak

Did the bridal shop have any ideas?  Personally, I'd suggest that she order the dress a size larger than she was pre-baby, since it's easier to go in than out.

jagore08

I agree with Aerin, she should order one size up from what she was before she became pregnant.  

AutumnFair

After baby weight is really hard to tell for some people because everyone is different but most people recommend ordering about 2 sizes up pre-baby. So if she was a size 4 before baby then she should order a 8. Now if she is a very active person say a runner then I would say just do one size up because active people can usually lose baby weight a lot faster (my friend after her 2nd child was back down to her pre-baby size by 8 weeks). 

But like aerin said it is always easier to take in then let out.

Also I would be very peeved at the store for pressuring me to get the dresses done and saying they will charge a rush fee if your wedding is in June and the dresses come in March. Seriously why is a rush even needed if the dresses only take a month and a half to get in? Don't let the mean sales women get to you.

seasidebride24

I'd recommend ordering a couple sizes up because it can definitely be taken in more easily than it can be let out.  My sister had her baby in September and she is still working on getting back to her pre-baby figure, she's had a harder time losing weight even though she has always been active. The problem with her ordering a dress later on is that the fabric used is likely from a different dye lot which can have slight variations, and can look like two noticeably different colors when held next to each other.  While I don't understand the rush charge, that might be why the bridal shop is pushing to get the order in.  Just a thought though, I don't agree with them pressuring you. 
Between ordering the dress and my older sister's wedding, my younger sister dropped almost 10 dress sizes.  Luckily she found a seamstress who did a beautiful job taking it in and you couldn't even tell.  Good luck!

Summer2011Bride

Can't she just buy a dress off the rack in the same length and color closer to the wedding? That's what my pregnant BM is doing. That way she is comfortable and knows it fits her. No one will think it's odd that your pregnant BM is not in the exact same dress as everyone else.

lacis

I am actually a seamstress so I offered to take it in for her so she wouldn't have to pay alteration costs. I just ended up telling her to wait until march to order. If she orders in march it will be in by beginning of may which would be plenty of time for me to take it in. The dress i chose is actually a pretty simple design too so if all else fails, I will just make hers. Thanks for all the advice everyone!

jcamm11

ditto pp's who said to estimate up in size, then have it taken in after the birth.

Mattie Lynn

I have a pregnant BM, right now shes not showing too much but she'll be having the baby before the wedding.  We are ordering the dress for the size that she is now (she has gained some weight already, but looses it fast post pregnancy).  Maybe you can choose a style that fits only around the bust line, like an emipre waist so that there is less to guess about.  Besides, bust alterations are not as difficult.  Thats what my BM and I are doing anyway.

StephieBow

I would say to go two sizes up (especially if she plans on breast feeding, even if the rest of her shrinks, that part will not)  That way, you can either take it in or let it out about a size (according to my bridal store most dresses can be let out about 1 size)

lilclarky2006

I am in the same situation. The dress shop told my pregnant BM to order it 3 sizes too big, that way they can always take it in. We were told as long as it's big, it won't be a problem, but if it's too small then we're in trouble. I would tell her to order a bigger size, (even if the its going to be way too big) just to be safe. That way she can always have it taken in.

melliefuller84

tell her to order big they can always size it down in alterations.

Butterfly219

Have her order up in size. Like everyone else says...it can be taken down. Just remember that it was her decision to wait and order knowing that it might cause additional fees. I've been stressing myself (4 or 5 BMs are pregnant) There dresses are in and one girl didn't judge her size right and it fits now, it won't fit in 2 months and it's too late to reorder and exchange. I stressed for a while...and (this is why I'm telling you) realize that IT IS NOT your problem to stress about. Seemstresses can do amazing things, ordering big or extra fabric will give your seemstress something to work with. You have enough on your plate to worry about. Let her use her best judgement with the help of the bridal shop and everything will work out.

cindy91788

I am going to have to deal with the same thing. I just found out one of my BMs is pregnant. She is due August 11th, and my wedding is Sept 23. Luckily, she will have the baby before the wedding. They are all ordering their dresses on Feb 26th.. and she is barely showing at all right now, so she has no idea how much weight she is going to gain or lose before the wedding (this is her first baby). She is naturally very petite (size 2), but who knows, she could gain 50 pounds and only lose 20 before the wedding. So we're hoping the salon knows well enough to suggest the right size for her and there won't be any problems. But this is definitely going to be weighing in the back of my mind until she has the baby and we know the dress fits. It is not something that can be bought of the rack, and I don't want one of my bridesmaids wearing an entirely different dress. As far as I'm concerned, this is her issue to deal with. She knew when my wedding was far before she got pregnant, so I really shouldn't be stressing about it, but I am!

joiner521

She may have to sit this one out boo.