Bridezilla?

countrymel

Please give me your advice on this ladies.  My best friend is insisting that I take part in a bachelorette party that includes a 20 hour drive with 7 girls during the course of 1 weekend.  The individual estimated cost is around $450.  I am working several jobs to make ends meet and I am pregnant.  I really want to make my friend happy, as she was SUCH a help during my wedding, but I'm worried about the money and taking the trip preggo.  I will be required to call off 2 days of work for 2 jobs a piece.  I just feel like this is a little much to ask.  What do you think?

vsgal

You are not required to attend pre-wedding events.  Just tell her that will not be able to attend and leave it at that.

hlq2011

Tell her you're sorry you can't make it, but you hope she has an amazing time.

FutureJilliannD

I agree, tell her to have a great time and how sorry you are you will miss it. Maybe send her a bottle of bubbly or something related to the party (i.e. white "bride" sunglasses if it is a trip to the beach) to make her feel special and show how you are thinking of her.

trix1223

She's completely out of line.  She is not owed an expensive b-party, nor are you obligated to attend ANY prewedding events.

Here's what you say:
"I'm sorry.  I won't be able to attend your b-party.  Hope you all have a great time."

No matter what she says in response, you reply
"As I said, I'm sorry that I won't be able to attend your b-party.  Hope you all have a great time."

Lather.  Rinse.  Repeat.

graysquirrel

Agree with pps. She doesn't have the right to insist that you pay over $400 to go to her party. If she is a b*tch about it and keeps harping on it, I'd tell her that you simply can't take off of work right now.

deepcovejackie

Um, no.  She's totally out of line.

sister2groom

She shouldn't be planning her own bachelorette party, especially one that is obviously difficult in terms of time and money for those she wants to attend.

So don't attend, and don't let her make you feel badly about it. You obviously have a lot going on, chances are even if you went and were that worried about money, tired from the pregnancy, etc. you probably wouldn't have much fun anyhow.

jagore08

That's a lot of money!  Just tell her that you're sorry you won't be able to make it due to finances and your work schedule but you'd be there in spirit.  

countrymel

I really appreciate your opinions on this ladies. I think I'm gonna tell her I'm not going.

joiner521

You take care of yourself. I would not go, you and baby first.

FutureJilliannD

Ah ok I misread last time. I thought it was the MOH who was giving you grief about this. If it is the bride, that is totally crazy that she is getting upset with you.

marinabreeze

FFS, you're pregnant and working hard to make ends meet.  Just with being pregnant, I would think she'd get if you didn't want to take a 20-hour trip for a bachelorette that she is planning herself (a huge faux pas).  There's a part of me that would tell her that I can't make it, and if she doesn't get it she can kiss my @$$. 

But I would not recommend this.  I agree with PPs.  I think you're doing the right thing in letting her know you can't make it.  And if she continues to harp on it, either bean dip or repeat.