How to include FMIL in wedding planning

FinleyF

I'm very much a DIY bride throwing a VERY small wedding and a medium sized reception. I'm very particular in what I want, and did most of the planning myself. The wedding date is in about 2 1/2 months and there really isn't much left to do. My FMIL asked if there was anything I needed help with a few months ago, but I told her it was all pretty much taken care of, thinking that she was offering help just to be polite. But now, everytime I see her, she is still offering help, leading me to believe that she really WANTS to do soemthing.

As there isn't really much left to do planning wise, how can I include her? What should I do to make sure she can be involved in some way?

My mom and her sister are hosting a bridal shower for me, and she has also offered her help with it. Any suggestions????

MobKaz

If your shower is being held in someone's home, is it possible she could incorporate one of her "famous" recipes into your menu?  Perhaps she could be in charge of guest favors (if that is done in your area), or decorations.

I guess the answer depends, in large part, on whether she does things to your liking, or if her offer has any "strings" attached. 

Does she have any particular strengths or talents that could lend themselves to anything you need?  Perhaps she could create a floral arrangement for the shower, or be the person to help build the ribbon bridal bouquet with the bows/ribbons from gifts you open.

Has the rehearsal dinner been discussed or planned?  Perhaps that is an area she could help with.  I guess, too, that if her offer is vague, and you aren't sure to what extent she wants to help, it would make things awkward.  Can you FI offer any more specifics as to exactly what she means by "help"?

If she has asked several times, it would seem she is sincere in wanting to help.

GeauxTigers17

I'd also let her do the rehearsal dinner if you haven't got one planned. That's typically the groom's mother's territory anyhow. 

My FMIL is completely handling that for us, bless her - we're just showing up. I have the opposite problem, but I guess I'm really lucky compared to some women on this board...she really doesn't seem to care much about the wedding details, is super laid back, and really won't even give me opinions, even when I directly ask. I've tried to involve her more at my fiancé's suggestion, but I've only met her once (his parents live very far away) and I think she's really afraid of offending me or something!

mandi921vh

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_include-fmil-wedding-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:89b9ee40-38e5-44b1-b71e-6333d7e017bcPost:f6b98f95-7afe-4c3e-b683-485ff5295303">Re: How to include FMIL in wedding planning</a>:
[QUOTE]Does she have a dress yet? You could ask if she wants to go MOG dress shopping together.
Posted by katelynbrian[/QUOTE]

<div>I like this idea.</div>