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How do i deal with my crazy mother?

I really need some adviceon how to deal with my mother, she keeps agruing with me about everything and is starting to pick fights. She fought with me the nightof my bridal shower, which she planned by the way, about how she thinks I'm picking my mother in law over her. She also says that I haven't included her in my wedding which isn't true because we have gone everywhere together like getting my dress, shoes, cake, centerpeices, invitations, ect. She says that I'm letting my future mother in law do everything and I have to decide if I'm her daughter or my mother in laws daugther. I have an older sister and i know my mom didn't put her thru this much stress about her wedding but with me it seems like everything is a battle. She's really making this experience horrible and I'm worried she will start a fight with my fiance's mom, any advice on how to handle this?

Re: How do i deal with my crazy mother?

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    edited December 2011
    Every time it starts...give her a big hug and kiss and tell her no one could ever replace her...and then change the subject.  Send her an email or leave her a message every few days that is something about you and her...but NOT wedding related (a news story, photo, joke, something).  Or, go the other way.   My daughter and I googled and found the absolutely most outrageous and tacky wedding things we could find and sent them to each other randomly...believe me, they are out there...saying that this is what we should do.  It was a hoot!  It became our thing...just us, to laugh together.

    When your sister got married...she still had you.  Now you are setting out toward your future, and it's scary!  She'll be fine.
    My baby girl is a married woman...and now my baby girl HAS a baby girl. Time unfolds in such an amazing way. I've been blessed!
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    skippylouwhoskippylouwho member
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    edited December 2011
    I'm a MOB (and a MOG too) and every once in a while I have to fight those types of feelings - that my kids prefer the future MIL to me.  99% of the time I know it's not true but every once in a while the green-eyed monster takes over.  I do have to remind myself to calm down, let it go.  

    I love my kids more than anything in the world.  Additionally, most of my family is dead.  If I LET it take over, I can become scared that they will get so busy with these other, bigger, fun families and leave me in the dust.  But I can't let that control me, I do have to push those thoughts out of my head and just continue on.

    It works for me, I can't say it will work for your mom because the root of what is causing this for her might be different.  My guess is it is similar, fear of being left out of your life.

    This empty nesting stuff, just like getting old, isn't for sissies!
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    edited December 2011
    What she said too!!!!!
    My baby girl is a married woman...and now my baby girl HAS a baby girl. Time unfolds in such an amazing way. I've been blessed!
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