HELP! tough situation

mehgan11

Ok so I have a bridesmaid who got engaged about 3 months after i asked her to be in my wedding party.  No big deal there.  She asked me to be in her wedding which was great we are great friends.  The problem I am having now though is everytime I book an appointement for my bridesmaids and I she books one the exact same day, the first time was ok, not a huge deal.  This time though she asked me if I would care and I said yes as we all had an alteration appointment and plans to finish up decorations, which she was fine with helping with, but she made appointment anyway and said to bad my weddings in October, and her appointment is in another town.  My question is am I overreacting on being upset she did that or am I right to be upset?

graysquirrel

What kinds of appointments is she making that both of you have to go to? Do you share the same WP members? If they are both dress appointments, that would bother me as well if they were totally conflicting. It shouldn't be too hard for both of you to find dates that will work for everyone. However, if they are appointments for things like cake tastings, floral apts, etc, BMs don't need to go to them and it shouldn't matter. 

Beachy730

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_tough-situation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:c7531304-5780-446a-b960-9175e290e3f1Post:001c7dd3-2829-404d-bda1-f7e3c6fa4ccb">HELP! tough situation</a>:
[QUOTE]Ok so I have a bridesmaid who got engaged about 3 months after i asked her to be in my wedding party.  No big deal there.  She asked me to be in her wedding which was great we are great friends.  The problem I am having now though is everytime I book an appointement for my bridesmaids and I she books one the exact same day, the first time was ok, not a huge deal.  This time though she asked me if I would care and I said yes as we all had an alteration appointment and plans to finish up decorations, which she was fine with helping with, but she made appointment anyway and said to bad my weddings in October, and her appointment is in another town.  My question is am I overreacting on being upset she did that or am I right to be upset?
Posted by mehgan11[/QUOTE]

Yes you are overreacting, and you have too many appointments with your BMs.  I don't really see the need for any appointments with them other than when you originally picked out dresses.  Your BMs aren't unpaid labor, so they have every right to decline your "appointments."  You really don't need to have them all do everything together, like alterations appointments and things like that. 

mehgan11

No we dont share wedding party members, I dont have to go to this appointment she made shes looking for a dress.  The only reason I am upset is because she asked and I told her yes it would care because you already made plans with the rest of my wedding party to help and finish up planning the bachlorette party which is the following day.  The town the appointment is in is an hour away as well.
I also no they are not unpaid labor, they all offered to help out and we talked and they wanted to do the alterations the same day. 

mgietler76

I always find these kinds of posts strange, I haven't been to any appointment with ANY of my BM's beside's the initial dress one. I wasn't even there when they decided (individually) what they would wear and when they ordered the dresses.
 
I have no idea when or if any of my BM's got alterations done either. I figured if they want to meet up and plan stuff, sweet. If not, sweet.

If the rest of your wedding party has an issue with her not meeting up to discuss the bachelorette party let them handle it.

lalap69

It sounds like she doesn't want to do those things, which is fine, she doesn't have to.  Let this go.  You shouldn't be involved in the planning of your bachelorette party anyway, not even to arrange "appointments" for your bms.  They're big girls, they can handle this themselves.