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MIL Issues

[Deleted User][Deleted User]
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in Moms and Maids
Is anyone else having MIL issues? I'm trying to be as amicable with her as possible but she doesn't seem to care that this is our wedding not hers. My FH was actually called and scalded by his Grandmom because he stuck up for us. So now he had to cower to her so that the peace is keep. I hope this won't be the norm. Any tips on dealing with the MIL? 
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Re: MIL Issues

  • Muffin'sMomMuffin'sMom
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    They are his family, he needs to deal with him.  He shouldn't have to "cower" as punishment for standing up for his future wife.  And if grandma complains...tell her that she needs to check her family bible...Genesis 2:24...Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.  Innocent
    My baby girl is a married woman...and now my baby girl HAS a baby girl. Time unfolds in such an amazing way. I've been blessed!
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Once your fils realize that the two of you are going stick together and stand strong, then will probably ease up on the badgering. Your fi did the right thing, there is no need for him to cower or justify himself.

    Continue to be polite to FMIL, without giving in to her demands.
                       
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  • zitiqueenzitiqueen member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Stop talking to her about the wedding details. Unless she's paying for it. Is she?
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    She is paying for the Rehearsal Dinner but my parents are footing the bill for the rest. 
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  • zitiqueenzitiqueen member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Then zip it and bean dip her. "We've got everything under control, FMIL, thanks for asking. Have you tried the bean dip? It's fabulous."
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  • MissyCeeMissyCee member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    MIL issues?  Um yea definitely. She's an italian know-it-all (not saying ALL italians are know-it-alls, but italians can be very strong willed) who can't mind her own business to save her life. Almost every decision we have made about the wedding she has an opinion on, and her opinion is always that we aren't doing things right.

    One of the biggest issues was that my FI and I decided we didn't want children at the wedding. FMIL harassed my FI about it telling him he needs to make an exception for his brother, who has a boy age 5 and girl age 3. The boy is THE reason I said NO children. He is a huge terror and I have never seen him behave. FI told her that we cannot make an exception just for them, that it's unfair and the fact doesn't change that we don't want kids there. We offered babysitting for them ( a VERY qualified sitter) and they refused and only the brother is coming to the wedding (he's in the wedding party) A couple weeks ago FI said that the sis-in-law was planning on bringing the kids to the ceremony and said she would sit towards the back and she promised they'd behave. I know FMIL was behind this plan. I was beyond annoyed at this, what don't they get about NO CHILDREN?

    This is only one problem among many with the FMIL. Hang in there and do not let her bully or harass you into making decisions that aren't yours and don't let them make you feel guilty because you don't agree with them. I know it's easier said than done but stay strong. This is YOUR day and you want no regrets! Good luck!
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