Moms and Maids

Shower Issues

I had 2 shower planned on in my home town and one in the town I moved to as a teenager and worked there for years. The first one was given by my cousin/personal attendent. I invited my grooms mother and sister in law. His sister in law had to work and could not attend. My FMIL thinks that she is a photographer, and when I introduced her to my cousin she like attacked her about
"did she know her responsibilities to the photographer" I was so imberassed. Then he told my cousin that she would not pass on a piece of paper. She actually said that she did not want to. Now when I got back home she has decided that she is going to give me a shower less than a month before the wedding. Like I want to be thinking about that. I really have no problem with her having a shower. But it would have been nice to have been asked when worked for me. I was told that it would be this day and that is was being worked around an aunts schedule. I'm stressed about alot of things and I dont want this to add to that. How do I tell her that I think it is a little close to the wedding.

Re: Shower Issues

  • jagore08jagore08 member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_shower-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:f552f8c9-d7ff-4540-8ea7-95d20c6ba703Post:6adf7f83-90aa-40cc-9f54-4f60447346c3">Shower Issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]I had 2 shower planned on in my home town and one in the town I moved to as a teenager and worked there for years. The first one was given by my cousin/personal attendent. I invited my grooms mother and sister in law. His sister in law had to work and could not attend. My FMIL thinks that she is a photographer, and when I introduced her to my cousin she like attacked her about "did she know her responsibilities to the photographer" I was so imberassed. Then he told my cousin that she would not pass on a piece of paper. She actually said that she did not want to. Now when I got back home she has decided that she is going to give me a shower less than a month before the wedding. Like I want to be thinking about that. I really have no problem with her having a shower. But it would have been nice to have been asked when worked for me. I was told that it would be this day and that is was being worked around an aunts schedule. I'm stressed about alot of things and I dont want this to add to that. How do I tell her that I think it is a little close to the wedding.
    Posted by amarier0911[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Maybe it's just me but I couldn't follow this post.

    </div>
    Ignorance is a poor defense. Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Jagore, I'm so glad you said that.  I tried to understand.  I went back to read it a second time to try to understand.

    If I can't figure it out after 2 readings, I'm just not even up for trying anymore.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • edited December 2011
    Good...it's not just me.
    My baby girl is a married woman...and now my baby girl HAS a baby girl. Time unfolds in such an amazing way. I've been blessed!
  • ootmother2ootmother2 member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
  • lharri12lharri12 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011

    The first half of this post makes no sense.  In the second half, she is upset that someone wants to throw her a shower a month before the wedding because that's "too close" to the wedding date.

    OP: Why would it stress you out to have someone throw you a shower?  All you have to do is show up, open gifts, drink punch, eat cake, and thank everyone for coming.  If that's stressful, it's because you're creating unwarranted stress.

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  • melissamc2melissamc2 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    A month is not at all too close to a wedding to have a shower.  As others have said, you show up and you open gifts.  The end.  As for her photography issues - she'll look like the ass if she goes on and on about it all, not you, so just let her be herself.  There is always the chance that you see things as annoying that others would not simply because she is your FMIL.

    I have to say, though, you've been having all sorts of shower issues for months (previous post you made).  It's a shower, not the G20.  It's either nice or it sucks and everyone carries on with their lives.  I kind of think you're MAKING it stressful.

    Good luck!

    10-10-10
  • aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    My sister had her shower the day before the wedding, because that was the only time everyone was going to be in town.  While it did create a bit of a time crunch because she had left so much to the last minute, she gave every indication of enjoying the shower.

    Relax.  If your schedule is so packed that you don't foresee having a few hours to take out of your afternoon to open presents and be girly, you're not planning very well.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • edited December 2011
    I looked at it a few hours ago and was so confuzzled I just left.
    image
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • edited December 2011
    I'm having my shower in the month before my wedding, and I have zero problems with it.  I'll be eating cupcakes and opening presents; there's not much to think about. 

    If the date actually conflicts with some urgent bit of wedding planning that you HAVE to do, just decline the shower.
    image
    murrayed
  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_shower-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:f552f8c9-d7ff-4540-8ea7-95d20c6ba703Post:8f6c5a57-f3c3-4fd1-8014-ba8c0f38eda9">Re: Shower Issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]ESL?
    Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]
    As the wife of a ESL speaker, I have to say no.  She's either really upset and not typing coherently or the school system failed her spectacularly.
    Courtesy of megk8oz
    image
    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
  • ootmother2ootmother2 member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    thanks brooke :)
  • edited December 2011
    Words are hard.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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