Advise

DeeDee00

    

deepcovejackie

OK, I think you may need a reality check.  Your BFF desperately wants to be pregnant.  Enough to have needles inserted into her ovaries for egg retrieval, getting hormone injections to ready herself for implantation, and then having a needle inserted through her cervix.  Enough detail for you?

Drinking at your wedding and bachelorette is the furthest thing from her mind.

Cross your fingers that she finally achieves a pregnancy.

deepcovejackie

So that being said, I really can't say much else.  I'm sure it will all work out for the best.

mandi921vh

As far as the dress goes; just pick something empire waist. 

AutumnFair

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_advise?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:faaa56a5-96b3-4835-b524-ad6037f442e2Post:f99e46c1-8d23-4761-b415-4ea4f2a43ec3">Advise</a>:
[QUOTE]Its not really advice that i need. let me just lay down the story.  My MOH is trying to get pregnant.  And is going as far as invitro.  She has been trying for months and hoping to be pregnant by now.  If she gets preg. withing the next month she will be ready to pop by my wedding or even miss out on the wedding.  She is my best friend and I am extremely happy for her and her husband. so in no way i am not wishing she don't get pregnant. and am not being selfish. i want her to be pregnant and to be happy. however i am worried about the outcome. what if she gets put on bed rest. or what if she doesn't get to attned my bachelorette party. or what not.  it would mean so much to me for her to attend. and not only that she would not be able to drink and and enjoy the party.  also i want her to be able to enjoy the wedding celebration and not have to leave early. or be on bedrest and not be able to attend. or even be in labor. also i worry about BM dresses. and how to plan for a pregnancy not only a pregnancy but a possible multiple pregnancy. i am just concerned about the whole thing. and wished the timing was different.  however i am extremely happy for her and her husband. and she and i have talked about this but she just always says it will be fine. it will work out. and im sure it will. i just can't help but worry about it. 
Posted by DeeDee00[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>On the outside you sound like you want to be happy for her, but there is still a small selfish "want" inside that is making you upset that if she gets pregnant the scenarios you wrote will occur.</div><div>
</div><div>My advice. Do not worry about it until it comes up. If she gets pregnant within the time frame that she might not attend try be flexible to whatever you best friend needs. If can't make the bachelorette party, be sad for a little bit but move on, I'm sure you will have plenty of other friends and family to make it an enjoyable time. </div><div>
</div><div>As for the wedding, if she is pregnant offer a chair to sit in at the end of the aisle. For her dress either pick a maternity dress style like empire waste or just wait until a month before the wedding and get something off the rack at a Bridal Store or department store that closely matches what color your aiming for. </div><div>
</div><div>Yes, it might suck that your friend might miss a lot of wedding related stuff or even the wedding itself. But you need to put her missing things pass you because it is not worth dwelling on, there are so many more things about your upcoming wedding to be happy about. Your friend is trying very hard to start a family, the best thing you can do is hope her dreams come true. If she gets pregnant, take things as they come and adjusted to the situation, if you can keep a cool head, things will be alright.

</div>

jerseydevil

There's not a whole lot to give advice about. You can't control when your friend will get pregnant, nor can you control how her pregnancy goes.

Just relax and enjoy whatever happens between now and your wedding and be happy to share the joy with her if she does acheive pregnancy. It would be a bummer if she has to miss the day and/or prewedding parties, but it is what it is.

aerinpegadrak

This is Schrodinger's baby right now.  Find something else to worry about until the waveform collapses and you know if there's actually a pregnancy to deal with.

vicki0508

Don't address any of this with her.  If she does get pregnant, don't bring up how much you wish she could drink and how you're sad she might have to leave early.  You don't want to guilt trip her.  If she is super pregnant at your wedding, she'll let you know what she needs (leaving early, sitting during the ceremony, etc)

But like PPs said - it's silly to worry about hypothetical situations that may occur prior to or during your wedding.  Huge waste of time and energy.

Cynthia1207

Worrying about ''what-ifs'' are useless, time-consuming and cause unnecessary stress.  Do yourself a favor and don't worry about it until it happens.  Not all in-vitros are successful so she's going to need you more as a friend right now than a bride whichever way it goes. You are both going through an emotional time and should be there for each other as friends first and as future-mom/bride second.

StacyJenniges

My MOH is actually due 3 weeks before the wedding, I picked out 3 styles of empire waist dresses and the one she picked will be the best for not knowing the size her boobs will be.  it is a mircle they got pregnat on their own with out help.  I am elated about it.  she is going to plan my bachorlett party a earlier than most would because of the baby and I am fine with that. 
I think you should not worry about this it is out of your hands and in Gods hands.  Things will work out, and hey who cares if she cann't drink, I use to drink alot and I find when I stopped drinking is when I started having the most fun so that doesn't matter.  I know that we would like the world to stop turning because we are getting married but it doesn't and peoples lives go on.  Pray that they get pregnant and maybe just slip something in about her not being due too close to your wedding. 

Good luck I hope all works out for you, but in the end everything will workout.