First off, I apologize if this is something that has been rehashed over and over on these boards. I am a newly-engaged bride-to-be and this is my first time posting on these forums. I admit that, though I browsed for this topic, I did not spend a lot of time looking specifically for "my situation"... I also apologize for the extended length of the post.
Some background: My fiance and I are getting married in August 2012 (the planning has just begun!). My mother and stepfather are insisting on paying for the wedding (and I couldn't be more grateful!!!). They have been married for 10+ years, and I have lived with them throughout. My stepdad has been very good to my mom, my brother, and me, and I love him dearly. Myfather lives several states away with his 3rd wife (my mom was his 1st). I still talk to him a few times a month, but see him only twice per year, at most. He did tell my mother that he'd help chip in for the wedding, but whether that will be the case (and how much) is yet to be seen.
For the ceremony, I was orginally planning to ask BOTH of them to walk me down the aisle. I want them both to be a large part of my "big day". However, my stepdad suggested to my mom that he'd be more comfortable starting me off as I enter and then handing me to my biological father to give me away. So the ceremony is a non-issue.
However, I've always envisioned my reception to have the traditional father/daughter dance, and have for years had the song picked out (Butterfly Kisses), so NOT having it is not an option. But I do not want to neglect the contribution my stepdad has had in my life, either... my fiance's family has had very few divorces in their family, so I'm a little worried that having 2 father/daughter dances may seem incredibly odd to them. So do I split one song between both men? If so, how would you go about doing so? I'm also a little nervous that my dad will be offended if I ask him to share "his" song with my stedad... though, I know ultimately it's "my day" and thus my decision. I also need to speak with my stepdad to get a feel for if he'd even like to be involved in that kind of thing (he's not typically one for the spotlight).
Help? Suggestions?
Thanks!