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Customs and Traditions

Invitations

Is it smart to put on the invite that the ceremony starts a half hour earlier than it actually does?

Re: Invitations

  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    No. I know some people are rude and are incapable of being on time but I am always on time and I would so mad if I was lied to about the start time and show up insanely early because of it. Put the correct time on the invitations, its incredibly inconsiderate to lie to your guests that will show up on time.


  • I was just thinking the same thing!  Thank you!
  • No.  That would be punishing the people who actually are able to arrive on time for an event.  Those would be the wrong people to "punish".

    I am a church organist.  Typically, people will begin to arrive anywhere from 20-30 minutes before the start time of your ceremony, which they will determine from your invitation.

    If you put the wrong start time on your invitation, you may have guests sitting for up to an hour before you start walking down the aisle.  They won't be happy.

    The church organist in me would be unhappy either way.  If you tell me the invitation time, and I plan to play 20 minutes of prelude and then get surprised by having to come up with another 30 minutes, I'm going to be unhappy.

    If you tell me the real time, and I walk into a church full of people and don't have the opportunity to quietly get my music set up and warm up a bit, I'm going to be unhappy.

    Put the time you intend your ceremony to begin on your invitation.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    I always arrive 20 minutes or more ahead of time. Please don't make me wait an extra half hour because I will think YOU are late for your own wedding.
                       
  • No, definitely not.  The start time on the invitation should be the start time of the ceremony.  If people are late, they'll just have to come in quietly and sit in the back.
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  • No, most people know to arrive 15 min before the time on the invite.
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  • I am always early for weddings because I get so excited lol! I agree that late people are rude though!
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  • tldhtldh member
    2500 Comments
    No.   There are few things more annoying than getting to the wedding on time (or early) and then be kept waiting.  To do this to your guests on purpose is just mean.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:a925e441-16fd-4841-b80e-66fe55c917caPost:bb32dedb-2ea6-4b73-aa64-c469472ebd25">Re: Invitations</a>:
    [QUOTE]I always arrive 20 minutes or more ahead of time. Please don't make me wait an extra half hour because I will think YOU are late for your own wedding.
    Posted by MairePoppy[/QUOTE]

    Same. If, though, say your own parents are running late, I feel it's okay to wait 5-10 minutes MAX to start the actual ceremony. But that's it. And that's normal.
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  • Why not say: please arrive at (whatever time you want).
    just dont say the ceremony will begin at a specific time on the invitation because then if it runs late, people think you or the groom decided to split.

    Keep the chapel or hall doors closed until right before the ceremony. Set up a table of pictures, and some juice or botteld waters and  maybe a guest book in front. People will arrive and mingle and not worry about the time.

    my uncle did that, and people mingled in the front lobby of the church and had lavender infused lemonade for about 45 minutes or an hour. When they were ready to get started, they opened the chapel doors and we went in. It was nice because some people DID show up like 2 mins before.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:a925e441-16fd-4841-b80e-66fe55c917caPost:0198bc86-63b3-4d9b-97e2-aa9ea60c5c52">Re: Invitations</a>:
    [QUOTE]Why not say: please arrive at (whatever time you want). just dont say the ceremony will begin at a specific time on the invitation because then if it runs late, people think you or the groom decided to split. Keep the chapel or hall doors closed until right before the ceremony. Set up a table of pictures, and some juice or botteld waters and  maybe a guest book in front. People will arrive and mingle and not worry about the time. my uncle did that, and people mingled in the front lobby of the church and had lavender infused lemonade for about 45 minutes or an hour. When they were ready to get started, they opened the chapel doors and we went in. It was nice because some people DID show up like 2 mins before.
    Posted by [email protected][/QUOTE]
    I second this. (oh, and lavender infused lemonade? YUM!)
    Question though - why are you so worried about this? Do you have lots of people in your family that can not make any event on time? If this is the case, then just plan for late people. Keep the doors open if possible so late comers don't take attention away from the ceremony - also have someone to direct the latecomers to the very back.
  • If I was trying to get to a ceremony and I knew I was going to be late, I wouldn't go in late. I would either wait to see them as they are leaving, or suck it up and just go to the Reception. It would be my fault that Im late and I would not want to distract from the ceremony in any way.
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