Wedding Party
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Attention Moderator.

The thread *sazatronic* has gotten waaaaayyy out of hand. I feel like I don't have the right to post my opinion on these boards. Isn't that what they're for? Whether people agree with them, or not? I have been offended, attacked, and insulted. Isn't a moderator supposed to keep this from happening? If this is the way theknot conducts buisness, I'm not so sure I want to be associated with this site. Everyone should be able to say what they want in a polite, unoffensive manner. I was minding my own buisness, posting to threads, when out of the blue, someone decided I wasn't allowed to say what I was saying. They are only another member, not an employee or even a Mod. People do NOT have to listen to what everyone on the boards says, so what's the harm in my posts? Maybe they'll help, maybe they won't, but ganging up on someone just because you think it's fun to make them feel bad sucks.
Daisypath - Personal pictureDaisypath Wedding tickers
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Re: Attention Moderator.

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_attention-moderator?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:0bfe70d8-3b05-4021-829e-1a4ea246bfa1Post:0a9ee203-014a-4a92-9252-8be8718437e6">Attention Moderator.</a>:
    [QUOTE]The thread *sazatronic* has gotten waaaaayyy out of hand. I feel like I don't have the right to post my opinion on these boards. Isn't that what they're for? Whether people agree with them, or not? I have been offended, attacked, and insulted. Isn't a moderator supposed to keep this from happening? If this is the way theknot conducts buisness, I'm not so sure I want to be associated with this site. Everyone should be able to say what they want in a polite, unoffensive manner. I was minding my own buisness, posting to threads, when out of the blue, someone decided I wasn't allowed to say what I was saying. They are only another member, not an employee or even a Mod. People do NOT have to listen to what everyone on the boards says, so what's the harm in my posts? Maybe they'll help, maybe they won't, but ganging up on someone just because you think it's fun to make them feel bad sucks.
    Posted by sazatronic[/QUOTE]
    image
    Sunbonnet or cone of shame? You be the judge! Trixie's Blog
    My Planning Bio
    My Married Bio updated March 4
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    pixiedust84pixiedust84 member
    First Comment
    edited June 2010
    Bahaha. Girl you gotta chill! Honestly if you've been around longer you'd know that that thread was not attacking you at all! Seriously it was a heads up and really an ask for clarification. It was not an attack.

    I lurked for a while before posting - then my first post was one where Trix said - "hey that's not really a good idea". I didn't freak out and say she attacked me I said. "Hmm it might not be a good idea" - and clearly if she's thinking that then other people at my wedding would be too. I have received nothing but good, helpful, honest yet respectful advice from people. Probably because I didn't go all nutso and yell at everyone in capital letters about being mean.

    Seriously - take some time to chill. Then come back and I think you'll see that people are actually quite helpful - they'll tell you when you're wrong honestly and respectfully. Until you get all defensive and snippy - then our sarcastic sides come out.
    Photobucket
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    Yeah, well, I don't want to be part of a community where actual opinions are frowned upon.
    Daisypath - Personal pictureDaisypath Wedding tickers
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    pixiedust84pixiedust84 member
    First Comment
    edited June 2010
    Well again - that is your interpretation. But if that's how you feel then I guess goodbye! Good luck with your wedding - here's hoping you don't follow some of the advice you give! I honestly wish you much happiness and a good wedding.
    Photobucket
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    BTW, if you dont want to continue a discussion, sazatronic, then just dont reply! Its actually pretty simple.
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    There's a difference between opinions and bad advice.  If you think that you have the right to treat people however you want without regard to their feelings, that's fine.  Just don't tell other people that they should do the same.

    If you don't want to be part of the community, then stop posting.  It's really quite simple.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    edited June 2010
    Oh, good Lord. (Or should I say ZOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!1!)

    For the OP - if you're going to be advocating honesty and the sharing of opinions then stop getting all into a snit whenever anyone here is doing just that. Clearly you're new to the board or you'd have a grasp of the general tone here - honest and upfront with the intentions of helping others / saving someone from making damaging decisions with their friends & loved ones. It's soemtimes tricky subject matter here since WPs involve a lot of family dynamics and friendships...it's not something as cut and dried as "How do I word an invitation when my parents are divorced?" or "What's a website I can find maple syrup favors on?".

    There will be various opinions and multiple ways to look at situations...which is part of the beauty of this board - different perspectives. However. Just plain bad advice is not something the board as a whole is going to endorse.  And if you're failry new to dealing with WP etiquette then it can be overwhelming and confusing. There's lots of room for mistakes and I know I learned a lot on this board a year ago when I was starting to think about my own WP. Maybe it's better to take a step back and lurk a little before broadcasting poor advice.

    And yes, if you prefer not to continue in a discussion it's easy - stop posting on the thread.
    The Bump ate my signature. DD - Apr 2011 DS - expected June 2013
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    People do NOT have to listen to what everyone on the boards says, so what's the harm in my posts?

    The harm in your posts is that people who are just looking for validation to do whatever horribly rude thing they want to do WILL listen to your posts and continue to contribute to the great rudeness prevalent in our society.  Just as you have the right to express your opinion, other people have the right to express that they think your opinion sucks.
    Married 10/2/10
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    There is only one comment in that entire thread that is out of line (hands around the throat thing).  Although it was said in a poor way, she was just saying that you sound controlling.  You seriously feel like you "have been offended, attacked, and insulted. " because someone called your controlling?

    The post was asking you to explain why you think that your advice is good advice.  If you skin isn't tough enough to take that, then you shouldn't be on the international boards, which you would know if you read any of the sticky's at the top of the page.

    You keep posting that everyone can have their own opinion, yet as soon as you don't like someone else's opinion, you go crying to the mod.

    " People do NOT have to listen to what everyone on the boards says, so what's the harm in my posts? Maybe they'll help, maybe they won't, "

    Maybe take your own advice here...

    "but ganging up on someone just because you think it's fun to make them feel bad sucks"

    No one was ganging up on you.  It just happens that all of the people in the last thread and in this one simply don't agree with you.  No one got together and said, hey, lets all gang up on saz.  They were all just giving you their opinion, which you keep insisting that everyone is entitled to.
    My Grandparents on their wedding day.
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    bio
    Repeat this to your self: My Wedding Party is made of my family and friends and I should treat them as such.
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    OP - you should probably get off the computer for a day and cool off.  If you can't take a little criticism or a little poking fun, you definitely need a little thicker skin.  Especially on a website full of women who have no problem calling you out.

    Have a better day :)
    panther
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    How many of your 35 posts have been flame worthy?  Seriously you need to chill out.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
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    Banana, this is off topic, but since you're going to be reading this one anyway I figured I'd just say that I like the new stickies :)

    That's all, back to the whining now.
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    I'm having trouble following, OP.  Why is it that you can post whatever you want, but no one else can? 
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    [QUOTE] I have been offended, attacked, and insulted. Isn't a moderator supposed to keep this from happening? If this is the way theknot conducts buisness, I'm not so sure I want to be associated with this site. Everyone should be able to say what they want in a polite, unoffensive manner.
    Posted by sazatronic[/QUOTE]
    1. You need a much thicker skin.
    2. If you don't want to associate with the site, then buh-bye. Easy easy, lemon-squeezy.
    BabyFetus Ticker
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_attention-moderator?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0bfe70d8-3b05-4021-829e-1a4ea246bfa1Post:52534bfd-ed68-4807-bf2c-15b47b41366c">Re: Attention Moderator.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Yeah, well, I don't want to be part of a community where actual opinions are frowned upon.
    Posted by sazatronic[/QUOTE]

    Then don't let the door hit you in the butt on the way out. Buh-bye!
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_attention-moderator?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:0bfe70d8-3b05-4021-829e-1a4ea246bfa1Post:63ec1458-bff5-46fc-8345-64842336ee3e">Re: Attention Moderator.</a>:
    [QUOTE]How many of your 35 posts have been flame worthy?  Seriously you need to chill out.
    Posted by andy71781[/QUOTE]
    Telling me not to express an opinion is not an opinion.
    Daisypath - Personal pictureDaisypath Wedding tickers
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    tldhtldh member
    First Comment
    I just read that whole thread and LMAO.  The only part that was out of line was the hands around the throat comment but even that was handled in a civil manner.

    Somebody PLEASE direct me to the thread that started this bruhaha.
    image
    AKA GoodLuckBear14
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    Nobody's telling you that you can't express your opinion. They're telling you that they think your opinion is wrong.
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    You're more than welcome to express your opinion, but you also need to listen and respond respectfully when they express theirs.  Nearly everyone around here has great advice, and if they are all telling you the same thing, maybe you need to take a step back and look at what you're saying.  The VAST majority of the responses on the other thread were great.  The sarcasm comes out when you throw a hissy fit and stomp your feet.   

    My first post was a bad idea.  A lot of the same people who responded to you responded to me telling me it was a bad idea.  I'm still happy to be hanging around here because I listened, took a step back, and re-evaluated my situation.  I would have been looong gone had I responded with, "NO, IT'S MY DAY AND I WILL DO WHAT I WANT AND YOU CAN'T TELL ME OTHERWISE." 
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    tldh - "Mom is unhappy about dress - solution?" and "Friend asked if she could be a bridesmaid"
    Anniversary
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    tldhtldh member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_attention-moderator?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0bfe70d8-3b05-4021-829e-1a4ea246bfa1Post:8e5fad96-5f4c-41e5-81ac-757a8732fa9f">Re: Attention Moderator.</a>:
    [QUOTE]tldh - "Mom is unhappy about dress - solution?" and "Friend asked if she could be a bridesmaid"
    Posted by suz62984[/QUOTE]


    Thanks and Oh for the love of God.

    Saz:  As you can see from my number of posts I am still a baby on these boards.  I lurked for weeks before posting anything beyond advice on where to get something so I could get a feel for how this goes.

    I still haven't posted on the snarky page though it's my favorite one to read and yesterday jumped into my first controversial thread.

    When you have this many people telling you unanimously that you are 100% in the wrong here, you are in the wrong.  I have seen many brides posting to see if their "special" situation will get them out of being a bad bride and I have yet to see them get the permission slip.  The biggest: "But it's MY day."  This one is guaranteed to have people jumping all over your you know what.

    The longer you read the posts, the more you are going to see sound advice coming as a whole.  Personally, I look forward to hearing from Trix and Aerin.  You will also see mature brides admitting they hadn't thought through the situation as thoroughly as the posters.
    image
    AKA GoodLuckBear14
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    Aww, thanks, tldh!  You totally made my day.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    ::waves to tldh::  thanks!  That was nice of you!
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    tldhtldh member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_attention-moderator?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0bfe70d8-3b05-4021-829e-1a4ea246bfa1Post:4dd20ce4-bf91-45cd-ac7f-09a275d9b05f">Re: Attention Moderator.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Aww, thanks, tldh!  You totally made my day.
    Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]

    <em>Really</em> happy to see you on the plantation post today.  I was wondering if I was going to be on my own there.
    image
    AKA GoodLuckBear14
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    Plantation post?  <interest piqued>
    Courtesy of megk8oz
    image
    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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    On Ceremony Ideas.  It's kind of a train wreck.

    Glad we had each other's backs!  I have to use all this book learnin' for something.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    All I can say is wow.
    Courtesy of megk8oz
    image
    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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    tldhtldh member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_attention-moderator?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0bfe70d8-3b05-4021-829e-1a4ea246bfa1Post:ed24122b-2b9e-4a08-8515-d6c3dcfd2a8b">Re: Attention Moderator.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Plantation post?  <interest piqued />
    Posted by bablingbrooke[/QUOTE]

    1/2way down on the Ceremony ideas page.  Enter at your own risk and with a glass of wine or your calming alcohol of choice at hand.
    image
    AKA GoodLuckBear14
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    Yeah I made the mistake of reading that sober.  
    Courtesy of megk8oz
    image
    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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    Whoa.  I just read that thing too--I'm headed to go grab an adult beverage now...
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