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Sister assumes she'll be the matron of honor but I'm not so sure.. HELP!

I was my sister's maid of honor, and she also had a matron of honor-- her best friend from high school. I am 10 years younger than my sister so I wasn't shocked but the reason I was her MOH was because I was her sister. We aren't INCREDIBLY close but she chose me because we're sisters.

Well now its my turn down the aisle and she's assuming that she's my MOH even though she has been the most unsupportive of my engagement in my family. My mom says that I should have her as the MOH regardless but I'm not so sure....

Suggestions on the matter???

EDIT:
My sister dated her now husband for 9 years before they got engaged and then were engaged for 3 before they tied the knot. So as you can add up, she was in her 30's when she got married. I'm in my 20's and she thinks I'm too young. She doesn't have any problem with my FI or anything like that. And we're having a longer engagement, which appeases her a great deal.
My family is 100000% supportive besides her, and my mother's reasoning is "you only have one sister" (which isn't exactly true, as I have a S-I-L from my brother's marriage and will be gaining a new S-I-L through MY marriage). My mom is chalking it up to generational differences and that my sister is pregnant. It isn't that she is horrid to me, its just that we've never been particularly close.

And the date in on the website is a guesstimate, we haven't solidified our date as of yet.
The best love is the kind that awakens the soul; that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. That's what I hope to give you forever.

Re: Sister assumes she'll be the matron of honor but I'm not so sure.. HELP!

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    Your MOH is supposed to be supportive of your union and they are standing up in support of you and your FI. If your sister does not support your engagement then why have her as your MOH?
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    trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited April 2011
    Why doesn't she support your engagement?

    ETA:  the way you worded your OP sounds like the rest of the family isn't supportive of the engagement either?  What's the issue?
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_sister-assumes-shell-matron-of-honor-but-im-not-sure?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:119196ed-16a5-40b7-8321-5a22ac90c1b1Post:1f5c3851-fd96-4e56-84b3-3a8c50f11d56">Sister assumes she'll be the matron of honor but I'm not so sure.. HELP!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I was my sister's maid of honor, and she also had a matron of honor-- her best friend from high school. I am 10 years younger than my sister so I wasn't shocked but the reason I was her MOH was because I was her sister. We aren't INCREDIBLY close but she chose me because we're sisters. Well now its my turn down the aisle and she's assuming that she's my MOH even though she has been the most unsupportive of my engagement in my family. My mom says that I should have her as the MOH regardless but I'm not so sure.... Suggestions on the matter???
    Posted by barefootbeauty511[/QUOTE]
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    Are you asking her to be a bridesmaid, or even inviting her to the wedding as a guest?

    If she's only being invited as a guest (or not at all), I would flat-out say to her and your mother, "You have not been supportive of my engagement, so I will not be asking you to be in my bridal party. You're being invited because you are a family member." If she's not invited at all, tell her that it's because she is not supportive of the engagement, and be prepared to fully cut her from your life. If your mom is giving you any money for the wedding, give it back ASAP and fund it yourself, because she will more than likely use that as blackmail to get you to have your sister as MOH.

    If you are asking her to be a bridesmaid, I would personally just make her a co-MOH with your closest friend. If she's already a bridesmaid then I don't see why she's good enough for that but not good enough to be MOH. There's not a whole lot of distinction between the two. Have co-MaidsOH to quiet your family down. If you will be asking her to be a bridesmaid then obviously she's not THAT horrid to you.


    But why is she not supportive of the engagement? Does she just have a stick up her butt? Or does she dislike your FI for a valid reason (abuse, criminal record, you're both very young, etc.)? If it's a valid reason, rather than worrying about your bridal party I would be listening to what she's saying. ESPECIALLY if she is not the only one in the family who feels this way.
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