Wedding Party

NWPBR: I don't get it.

FI isn't here to vent to and this is basically my go-to board.  I'd prefer if it isn't quoted in the entirety as I might need to DD later.

For some reason, it seems like a million and one people want to be invited to our wedding or bring extra people with them or request that we invite more people.  We wanted 70 guests, it started ballooning toward 250, got it down to 100 and it has risen by 10 in the last couple months for various reasons.  So no, people making these requests, we can't just add people willy nilly.  Not to mention that most of the invites are printed, sealed and stamped.

We go through lulls where I think the guest list is under control and we've stood our ground well enough, and then it starts up again.  I am not looking forward to when invitations go out in a couple weeks because I feel like it is just going to get worse. 

My family has always been the "you're invited and bring whomever" type, but that's at parties at the house with DIY food and I think it is kicking my butt now.  With OOT family and parents' guests, less than half of the guest list is our close longtime friends.  We've cut people we were fairly close to, and some of the people that are being pushed to be added are those that were cut and would absolutely be invited if it were a 150 person wedding, so I feel particularly guilty about it.

I know it's okay to stand my ground and say "the venue can't hold any more" but is it normal to be really frustrated and feel guilty about it?  Or am I just supposed to feel loved because so many people want to come to my wedding and bring the crowds with them?

If you made it this far, you are awesome and get a cookie.

Re: NWPBR: I don't get it.

  • Gotta, I could have written this post a year ago.  My suggestion: margarita, vent to FI, vent to WPB, repeat.
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  • follow your own advice and eat some cookies!  I'd feel frustrated and guilty too.  I don't like saying no to people.

    I'm really impressed that you got 250 down to 100.  If you can do it once, you can do it again.  right?  and then eat another cookie. 
  • I'll trade my cookie for your Reese's, please.  That would be motivation!
  • One Reese's for every guest not invited...

    Blame my FMIL.  She's the one who got me addicted when she sent a bag of them to me.  That was the best care package ever.

    Then the June 2011 siggy challenge last month was favorite candy.  March's challenge is wedding colors, but since those change almost every day, I stuck with candy.
  • I see this being a problem in my immediate future.  My mom has been asking about adding more guests that already has over 190 on it (although about 40 are ones we expect won't come).  Even though STDs went out two months ago, and we're getting ready to print out all of our invites, etc.  Just keep holding your ground, and remember that the invites will be out soon- and you won't have to worry about it anymore.  And eat some cookies, lol.
  • Can you webcast the ceremony maybe?  That might solve the issue of the officiant's parents wanting to just watch him work.  We're planning on doing that because we cut our guest list waaaay down, all you really need is a laptop, a decent webcam, and some sort of internet access.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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