Wedding Party

Sorry- you're not a bridesmaid? How to tell them without hurting their feelings...

I have a friend, that while my FI and I were talking about getting engaged, just assumed she'd be part of the wedding party. She would say thigs like- "I can't wait to do this and I can't wait to help pick OUR bridesmaids dresses, etc..."

I am limited to 5 bridesmaids and it was down to this girl and my room mate from college. While me and "this girl" may be closer, II chose the room mate from college because she is more dependable and is the only bridesmaid that lives close to the ceremony site (we live in the same town now- everyone else is an hour or more away). Plus her and her mom have offered to throw me a shower.

With four months until the wedding, I think she knows she's not a bridesmaid, but what are somethings I can do to  make her feel a part of things without hurting her feelings. And should I come out and tell her she's not one?

Re: Sorry- you're not a bridesmaid? How to tell them without hurting their feelings...

  • Options

    Aw, I'm a siggy quote! I feel so honored Laughing

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.

    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • Options
    Please read Emily's post again and then pretend that I wrote it.  Because it's just what I would have said.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • Options
    Again Ditto to Emily. Emily get out of our heads. :-)

  • Options
    edited April 2010
    Okay this is not at all related to the question and may be somewhat creepy as this entire post has become all about Emily but girl... I am in love with the picture in your sig! It's beautiful!! Definitely a framer!
  • Options
    Hahaha, I win at this post! Jenna, compliments are never creepy. And thank you :)
  • Options
    I personally can't understand why everyone is being so harsh. Yes you might not agree with her motives but maybe she isn't explaining things the right way. She is asking for help not to be bad mouthed on a post. Also there are many reasons to have a limit of people, ours was cost. I also think that people define "close" in different ways so she might be saying a close friend but to others she might not qualify as that.

    I had a similar issue with a friend (we aren't as close as we use to be) and choose not to have her in my wedding. I did have a convo with her about it because she still is a friend and I wanted her to understand what I was feeling. So to answer your question about telling her she isn't in the wedding I would wait until she says something about it. Then explain it to her nicely, if she is a real friend she will understand and if not it was a good thing you didn't have her in the wedding.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards