contemplating my precessional

HisCB

i really wanted to honor my 3 brother's wives/gf (they are like sisters to me), but i opted not to have them be bridesmaids, i also wanted to honor 2 of my nephews(10 and 11) as "ushers" because all of my other neices and nephews have "jobs". my dad and i are not close, so my older brothers are walking me down the aisle. i wanted to honor my younger brother also, as an "Usher" the only neice that doesnt have a "job" is going to be 14 months old.. Fi doesnt have any siblings. and neither of us have grandpas, so here is what i came up with:

guests are seated, then:

SIL & Nephew/usher (her 10 yr old son)

SIL & Nephew/usher (her 11 yr old son)

SIL and Neice (her 1 yr old daughter) 

FOG & G’s GMA (his mil)

SFOB & B’s GMA (his mom)

Brides Bro/usher & MOB

Groom and MOG

2 Ring bearers

Bridesman & bridesmaid(sob)

BM & GM

BM & GM

MOH(sob) and Best Man

2 flowergirls

2 more flowergirls

Bride and her 2 older brothers

2 train carriers

bablingbrooke

That's a really long processional.

HisCB

i knew someone would say that.
also i just talked to my mom and she says we should include my grandma's boyfriend, so they will walk together, then my sdad and my mom will walk together and my brother will walk with his gf and their 1 yr old.
i think this may be it.
i am going to ask the SILs if they want to be in the processional, if they do, then it will stay, if not, then they will just sit with their kids when the other guests are seated.

bablingbrooke

Is it typical in your family for the whole family to be in the processional?  I'm not criticizing you, I was just a little like, "Whoa."

trix1223

First of all, it's a processional, in case you put it in your program.

I would find this very, very odd, to be honest.  While I get that you love your family, everyone understands that you just can't have everyone in a processsional. 

And I think you actually end up detracting from your WP by having all the other random people process as well.  Because really, one of the precious few official "roles" of a WP is the processional.

So in an effort to include everybody else, you're actually taking away from the honor of being a member of the WP, IMO.

Gather the family together for several post wedding pictures.  Take various combinations.  Take a massed photo of everyone.

I think you have all good intentions, but a giant processional?  I wouldn't do it.  Sorry.

ETA:  I also think that, based on your description, this mega-processional is all about YOUR family.  What about your FI's family?  Do they all get a special place in the processional as well?

And I think that trying to set this all up in the back of the church on wedding day has the very real potential of becoming a logistical nightmare.  I work in a really big church, with a large area (we call in the narthex) where the WP waits before the processional starts.  We'd be hard pressed to fit that many people in the very large space that we have.

HisCB

i knew it would be long, i am one of 6 kids and have 12 neices and nephews.
to answer your question, when my parents got married, all my siblings and my oldest brother's wife (the only one at the time) were all included.
my oldest brother got married at the courthouse, no processional
my other brother had only immediate family at his reception anyway
my younger brother isnt married yet.

when my cousin was married, all of her siblings were in the processional

the only way that i could really cut the processional is if my sister in law's arent part of it. then what will my younger brother do? he would be the only sibling to not be in the processional.

aerinpegadrak

...so who's going to watch the processional?  It kind of seems like everyone at the wedding is in it.

trix1223

Well, for starters, if you haven't asked everyone yet, I don't see a need for 2 RBs, 4 FGs, 2 train carriers.  That cuts 8 people there.

Then I'd cut the 3 SILs with the nephews.  That cuts another 6 people.  Just let them be seated with your other guests.

Mothers (and fathers) of the bride and groom are typically seated before the processional begins.  So they are not in the "processional", but are seated last before the processional begins.

Like I said:  I'd keep the 8 people actually in the WP:  bridesman, 3 BMs, and MOH, the groom's attendants, and the bride.

There you are.

PeonyPrincesskdd

whats your song???

HisCB

as for who will be watching the processional, the rest of the 200ish guest list will be.

my fiancee is an only child. and the only part that he wanted was his gma and parents being seated.

and yes i already went over the pros and cons of having so many fgs, rbs, and tcs. and i decided i wanted them to be included. it was an all or no one kind of thing, and i didnt want no one.

i was considering making a transition between the moms, gmas, and sils being seated and the WP, like a different song or something.

as for space, we should have plenty of space for everyone, we arent getting married in a church, but in our home theater. we have rooms at the back of the space, through some double doors,

PeonyPrincesskdd

if you have a long enough song, its doable.  Just have some people walk a bit faster than others.  It should only take 2-3 minutes for a processional.. or am I wrong lol.  I think it could work, but I am not an expert and only been to one wedding other than my own lol.. one formal church wedding, that is

gottahavashorti

That sounds insanely complicated.  And the number of child attendants is recipe for further complications, possibly a tantrum. 

Running of the children, herded by SILs if needed
G's GMA & ushers (10-11 yr olds)
B's GMA & usher (brother of bride)
FOG & MOG
SFOB & MOB
Bridesman & BM
BM & GM
BM & GM
MOH & BM
Bride & brothers

PeonyPrincesskdd

I agree it's very very long but if you already have your mind up, then do it.

If you didn't set anything in stone then think about.

There are ways to honor people other than having them walk down the aisle.

The bridal party and flower girls should be the only ones.

It may be confusing for some in the pews thinking what is all this

And long and tedious when you look back at your video, if you have one

HisCB

i appriciate all of the imput.
and thanks for the suggestion to change things gottahaveashorti

i might have the sils walk down with the RBs and ushers, then the RBs can give the rings to the officiant.

i spoke with my mom and she says my gma should be escorted by her boyfriend, i dont know why i didnt think of him, probably because i havent met him much.

so my little brother will walk with his gf and their daughter.

we will have a RD to figure out the timing and everything

also, all the kids will be seated with their parents when they get up front.

PeonyPrincesskdd

I still didn't see what song is your processional. I am always interested in what brides are doing these days.  I did trumpet voluntary which is traditional, but I am wondering what all the other brides's are doing. 

kshira

I'd be concerned about everyone who isn't in the processional.  That's going to be a long time where all they are watching is just people walking down the aisle, a very long time....

I think part of the processional is to have your family (not just your unrelated guests) get to watch and enjoy you and your fiance coming down the aisle.  By the time they get to their pew, they're going to miss the next few (or several) people coming down the aisle because they're trying to get seated.

It could also cause problems because you're going to have so many empty spots open in the front that other people are going to want to take and it may annoy them that they won't be filled until the last minute.  As someone who is short, I really try to pick out a place behind another short person so I can see...but what if the FOG sat in front of me and I had to sit with my head tilted for the entire thing because I had no clue who was sitting in the front?  I also think that having all of those children in the very front will be troublesome.  Most kids and their parents try to sit on the edges or in the back just in case there is a tantrum or something else where they need to step outside.

banana468

As long as the OP has ushers, there should be no picking seats up front.

kshira

I've never been to a wedding where the ushers told every person where they had to sit.  Most of the weddings I've been to, the ushers just escoted the single women and that was it....So there was a lot of picking seats. I've actually always picked my seat at weddings.  If it was me, I would be concerned about annoying my guests which is what I was aiming at saying.

HisCB

Well, I think it is pretty common that the first few rows are reserved, and they will have a reserved sign on them.
I doubt people would be annoyed that the seats up front are for parents, grandparents and immediate family. 
I dont think that people in the pews will wonder, half will know one mom or the other, and one grandma or the other, and half will know who the sils are. the rest is pretty self explanitory.
I agree that it will be nice for parents to watch us coming down the aisle, and by the time that the wp and i come down, they will be seated and able to turn and watch. The only part they will miss is watching gprents be seated, which isnt a big deal, and is important to the both ofus. Also my fi's mom will be escorted down by my fi. which I think is special, better than the groom and officiant standing alone at the front just waiting.

i havent picked the songs yet, eek, i need to do that.

526SadieSadie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_contemplating-precessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:4e149129-cb7e-4996-b170-42947c598310Post:27770253-72b6-418a-9bb4-c5f11c69c95c">Re: contemplating my precessional</a>:
[QUOTE]Is it typical in your family for the whole family to be in the processional?  I'm not criticizing you, I was just a little like, "Whoa."
Posted by bablingbrooke[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I was kinda "whoa" myself.  I hope you pick a really long song to get all of those people down the aisle! 

lenergyrlah

The processional I had planned isn't nearly as long as hers but I'm thinking it may be still too long?

Ushers seat grandparents and parents but that is really before the processional.  I also had planned that the guys would start up front (enter through a stage door) since I've never been at a wedding where the guys walk up the aisle.

BM
BM
2 FGs together
3rd FG together with RB
MOH
Bride

The reason for 3 FGs is because FI has 3 young female cousins (ages 4, 6, and 8) who all love me and would have hurt feelings if I chose someone only 1 of the 3.  Also I considered having no FGs or RB but I'm pretty sure that the kids would want a part in our wedding.

I also have another question; the MOH is my sister who is also a professional musician.  I wanted her to play the processional music and was thinking she could just not walk up the aisle, and after the processional is done she would just walk from the piano up to the stage and stand next to me.  Do you think this is a bad idea?  Also this would mean that the closest BM would need to hold the ring (unless Best Man has both) and i'm wondering if that would look weird?