delete, problem solved

amylynn314

...

bablingbrooke

Her having a baby should be no factor in the decision of whether to make her MOH.  And I hope you're not punishing her for not falling over herself with excitement with your ring.  It doesn't sound like it, but those are such silly things that it's not worth you even mentioning them.  It comes across as petty.

I personally think that grown women who hold friends to childhood promises of being MOH have a screw loose.  Just ask who you want to ask and don't say anything to her--don't call her up and say, "You're not in my WP" and under no circumstances should you tell her why.  It's basically saying that her friendship isn't good enough and that conversation will never end well.

As you say, you have plenty of time to think about this so don't make the decision for awhile.  You may feel differently in a couple of months.

If she asks you, say that you picked the WP but that you can't wait to see her and the baby at the reception.  For the record, SHE is in the wrong if she asks you.

However, are you absolutely sure you're not as close as you say?  It would explain why she thinks she's MOH.  If someone could have reasonably expected to be in the WP and isn't asked, that can be a recipe for hurt feelings.  Would it be terrible and such a big deal to ask her to be a BM?  I assume she'll be in the formal photos and invited to all the pre-wedding events anyway, so it wouldn't make much of a difference to put her in the WP.  I absolutely think you should only ask whom you want, but if you think about it it doesn't sound like it would be that big of a deal.  Just something to think about.