sister/maid of honor wants date moved a week up since it fits her schedule better

shimmytwin

My twin sister is going to be my maid of honor.  My fiance and I have planned a tentativ date of October 5.  She goes to school in another state, and she starts a new quarter the week before our wedding, so taking lots of time off isn't practical, or maybe even doable. However, the last week of september, she has the WHOLE week off, and could be here all week to plan etc.  She wants me to move the wedding a week up. Our venue IS available that day...so we possibly could. BUT. We have a friend getting married the Saturday she wants my wedding moved to.  And we would do ours on Friday.  I said that is a huge no-no.  We are both going to be invited to our friends wedding, it'll be 2.5 hours away from mine, and i'm considering if we do that, going to hers even if I do move my date to the day before (if we're not uninvited!). BUt I keep saying that is such a naughty thing to do as a friend.  I think only 3 other guests would be affected by the same weekend wedding thing.  Should I seriously consider moving my date to the last Friday in September so she can be there for more of it (to help, just be there, etc) or keep it first Friday in October, hope she can be part of as much as possible, and not piss off my friend (who's ok with me having my wedding a week after hers).

MiksChick23

I didn't pick my date around anyone but FI & myself. I'd be irritated if my friend planned a wedding the day before if there was a big guest overlap....

I guess you could use that week to get stuff done with your sister, relax the following week, and still get married on the day you have in mind. Believe me, you will want to have things done ahead of time and not cram them in the week of anyway.

mcskatcat

So, just to get this straight, can she be there the day of the wedding?  Because that's the only thing that's important. 

I personally would have moved my date if I thought someone in my immediate family would not have been able to come to the wedding - the day of.  I would not have moved it, especially if it was going to be a day  before another good friend's wedding, just so someone could give me a hand the week before. 

I guess I would also say to feel out your friend about this.  Go look at the E board.  She'll probably freak out that you want to have yours the night before hers, but I would bring it up and it might be the only way your sister could come and then everyone would be in town anyways. 

TiffannieF

If she can make it to the wedding I wouldn't do it. I understand that she wants to help and be there for but she doesn't have to, she needs to be there at the wedding (she also doesn't need to be at the rehearsal). If she can't be at the wedding then I might reconsider. I would be conflicted myself. One side I would think "Why can't my sister just come to the wedding anytime....what is the difference if you chose October or November?". The other thing coming to my mind is your friends wedding. Although they are friends and guests they shouldn't be more of a priority then your immediate family/MOH.

HannahK15

My sister is also going to be my MOH and also in college. I picked Oct 6 even though she is going to be college and be out of state. She is coming home only a few days before the wedding. I would just keep your date as is

mbody

If she can be there on your original wedding date, then I would just keep it. I don't think you should really move it just so she can be there for the week to help plan. I don't think I would want my wedding the day before my friends just for personal reasons. I really think I'd want to relax with my new husband- not rushing around trying to make it to another wedding, but that may be just me.

jemmini6

Trust me, there's actually not that much stuff that you'll need help with the week before the wedding unless you did a ton of DIY projects that you didn't plan well enough to finish them on time.  While it's nice to have the company, it's completely unneccessary for your sister to be there for an extended period of time to 'help' (and that's not really her responsibility in the first place).

As long as she can be there the day of your wedding (and likely the day before for your rehearsal) with no conflicts with her school, then I wouldn't move your date.  If you do move your date, it's likely that neither you or your friend will be able to attend each other's weddings, so that's something to consider.