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Worried about my MOH...HELP

I don't know if I am over reacting or if I should honestly be worried. My MOH is my best friend and has been for 17 years. I had no doubt that I wanted her right next to me on my special day but as things progress, I am starting to get worried. I'll try to keep this as short as possible...she is having issues in her love life with an on and off again boyfriend which has started to get in the way. She gets really emotional and will sometimes disappear for days if they are "off". If she is having a bad day and I mention something about the wedding she will make a comment like she doesn't want to talk about it. During my dress shopping she was on her phone texting part of the time, barely said anything and just made looks if she didn't like something. I mentioned to her that my FH and I were thinking of doing a semi joint bachelor/bachelorette party in Vegas, that didn't go over well and she completely knocked it down! NOW she has stated school and is taking full time units and working full time, she has already said she is going to have absolutely no time until Christmas and to expect to not see her. Well so far, she's right. I haven't seen her in weeks, we barely talk because she's always busy, I feel like I don't have a MOH.
I have no clue what to do but I would love her help with stuff, advice, input. The normal stuff a BFF/MOH is there for. Do I say something to her about it? Do I leave it alone? I'm confused!
Untitled TTC#1 - DX w/ Endo in 2004 - Married 5/21/11 - Stopped BC in 2/12 - Started TTC 6/12
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Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP

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    Your post started off saying that you are worried about her, as your friend.

    Your post ended with you saying that you are upset that she's not there helping you plan your wedding and that you feel she's not living up to the MOH title.

    Stick with the first part. It sounds like she really needs a friend right now. Don't bring up your wedding or her role in it. Ask what's bothering her and if there's anything you can do to help. If she insists that she's O.K., expect nothing more from her than to get the dress and show up to the wedding (which is all that's required of a MOH or bridesmaid anyway), and continue to try reaching out to her in a non-wedding-related way and see if you can get her to open up and admit what's wrong.

    This is a friendship problem, not a matter of her not fulfilling her MOH obligations (which don't really exist in the first place). Her not being around to help you plan should be the LEAST of your worries about her. So what if she doesn't plan? Get your FI to help you, and if you need to bounce ideas off someone then talk to Knotties because they will be much more interested in wedding plans than any of your real-life friends will be (because they are also planning weddings, not because your friends don't love you).
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    To add to what the other wise ladies have said, you and your FI shouldn't have any say in planning your own bachelor/bachelorette parties.  They're parties that are thrown for you, and if no one throws them, they don't happen.  That's just how it is, not everyone gets one.  I didn't, and I still had a perfectly successful wedding.  So yes, she had every right to shoot down your idea of Vegas, because it was entirely inappropriate for you to suggest it.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    Please lurk (ie. read a bunch of other posts on this board).

    You'll run into this same question over and over again and will see that the advice is always the same, plus it might help you to see that you're not the only one whose WP have busy lives that don't revolve around the wedding.
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    AutumnFairAutumnFair member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited September 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:5a6d4b97-d8f5-4687-817f-473352f93051">Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE] If she is having a bad day and I mention something about the wedding she will make a comment like she doesn't want to talk about it. [/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Why would you talk about your wedding when she is obviously having a bad relationship day? Talk about throwing salt into an open wound. </div><div>
    </div><div>[QUOTE] I mentioned to her that my FH and I were thinking of doing a semi joint bachelor/bachelorette party in Vegas, that didn't go over well and she completely knocked it down! NOW she has stated school and is taking full time units and working full time, she has already said she is going to have absolutely no time until Christmas and to expect to not see her. [/QUOTE]</div><div>
    </div><div>First of all, you should not be planning your own bachelorette party, also if she is a full time student and works I would think that whatever precious money she has is going to her own living means and school. So for you to say that you want your B-party in Las Vegas is over stepping <em>big</em> time.</div><div>
    </div><div>[QUOTE]  Well so far, she's right. I haven't seen her in weeks, we barely talk because she's always busy, I feel like I don't have a MOH. I have no clue what to do but I would love her help with stuff, advice, input. The normal stuff a BFF/MOH is there for. Do I say something to her about it? Do I leave it alone? I'm confused!</div><div>Posted by lillolo [/QUOTE]

    </div><div>I'm sorry but your friend is SUPER busy trying to go to school and work. She at least gave you a heads up of not really chatting as much. She does NOT have to do anything besides get her dress (in which I hope you consulted her and the rest of your BMs individually to see what their price range is since she is in school) and show up the day of your wedding. Her being interested in your wedding is not required so stop talking wedding around her unless she brings it up.</div>
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    i totally disagree with everyone elses statements. Your wedding is very important and your friend could of handled herself a little better. She could still be making an effort to show interest by asking about the wedding plans or at least feel bad that shes so busy or check up on the situation every once in a while. I dont know where you live but Vegas may be a bit pricey for someone who is in school, so that may be something you should compromise on. But hey if she doesnt seem to want to plan or even want to TALK about your wedding...id say do whatever is best for you. Of course you should be there for her and not just worry about you, but that goes for her too- she should show some INTEREST at least in your wedding if she is the MOH. I had a similar experience as you and I felt the same way as you so I completely understand. I'm sorry its your wedding and you only do it once...you have a right to be slightly selfish. To me it more so sounds like she's a bit jealous of you and is using any excuse to not have to deal with it.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:be6c7272-56be-48c4-88b3-412e7b040198">Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE]i totally disagree with everyone elses statements. Your wedding is very important and your friend could of handled herself a little better. She could still be making an effort to show interest by asking about the wedding plans or at least feel bad that shes so busy or check up on the situation every once in a while. I dont know where you live but Vegas may be a bit pricey for someone who is in school, so that may be something you should compromise on. But hey if she doesnt seem to want to plan or even want to TALK about your wedding...id say do whatever is best for you. Of course you should be there for her and not just worry about you, but that goes for her too- she should show some INTEREST at least in your wedding if she is the MOH. I had a similar experience as you and I felt the same way as you so I completely understand. I'm sorry its your wedding and you only do it once...you have a right to be slightly selfish. To me it more so sounds like she's a bit jealous of you and is using any excuse to not have to deal with it.
    Posted by meghkenn345[/QUOTE]

    I don't agree with this at all and this whole post left a bad taste in my mouth.
    imageimage
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    As a fellow student, you aggravate me. You haven't the faintest idea of what a student's budget is, do you? Suggesting Vegas and other such nonsense (which aside from cost is completely rude of you anyway since the party is not an obligation for anyone) is ridiculous of you.

    Working full time and being a full time student is freaking tough. I've worked 2-3 jobs for the last couple years in college and I can tell you that it's not exactly a picnic. If I was a BM and some bride said "I really would love it if you took me to Vegas for my bachelorette party," I might have to slap you. Seriously. Try being a little more empathetic.

    She's not your servant or your personal assistant. She is not required to help you with anything, so stop saying "I feel like I don't have a MOH." You're not required to feel that way until the day of when she's standing up there with you. My MOH and a BM are both 4 hours away. They have done nothing except look at some dresses with me for a fun little BM dress shopping day they requested. Other than that, there's been nothing. I don't even get to talk to my BM that much because we're both swamped with me finishing school and her starting grad school.

    Your friend is most likely very busy. You will most likely not see her until Christmas. My family is only seeing me between now and Christmas because I'm going down there (to work another job) one weekend in October. It's entirely reasonable that she would tell you this. Give her a break.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:be6c7272-56be-48c4-88b3-412e7b040198">Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE]i totally disagree with everyone elses statements. Your wedding is very important and your friend could of handled herself a little better. She could still be making an effort to show interest by asking about the wedding plans or at least feel bad that shes so busy or check up on the situation every once in a while. I dont know where you live but Vegas may be a bit pricey for someone who is in school, so that may be something you should compromise on. But hey if she doesnt seem to want to plan or even want to TALK about your wedding...id say do whatever is best for you. Of course you should be there for her and not just worry about you, but that goes for her too- she should show some INTEREST at least in your wedding if she is the MOH. I had a similar experience as you and I felt the same way as you so I completely understand. I'm sorry its your wedding and you only do it once...you have a right to be slightly selfish. To me it more so sounds like she's a bit jealous of you and is using any excuse to not have to deal with it.
    Posted by meghkenn345[/QUOTE]

    <div>Wow really?  It's a wedding, you only get <em>one day</em>...there is no "right" to be "slightly" selfish or to be a d**k to your friends.  The fact that the OP is having it better in the relationship department than her friend/MOH doesn't necessarily equal jealousy.  No one likes a braggart.
    </div>
    To the OP, no one is going to be as excited about the wedding as you are.  Your friend not being super excited about the wedding doesn't mean she doesn't care.  She is going through a lot, and while she's probably happy for you, having you talk wedding stuff when she's having a bad day may seem like gloating/bragging to her.  Maybe you should talk to her as a friend, and not always bring up wedding stuff.  When it's necessary, ask her (individually and privately) about her dress budget and choose based on the lowest budget of all bridesmaids, tell her about dress deadlines and dates/times for the RD and wedding.  And leave it at that. 

    Also, she did tell you in advance that she would be busy with full-time school and working, so it's not like she dropped off the earth with no warning.  So I don't see what the problem is.  I'm a student myself and at times I have worked the equivalent of a full-time job on top of school.  During those times I really am busy and I can't always keep in the best touch with my friends, but it doesn't mean that I stopped being a friend or checked out from my prior commitments to my friends.  As MOH all she has to do is get the required dress in time for the wedding, participate in the ceremony and smile for pictures.  My MOH moved to a new city a couple of months ago and started a new job, and she told me that while she's in her training and starting out, she's not going to be available to talk as much.  That's fine, and I'm not flipping out about that.  I still feel like I have a MOH.  Unless you expect too much from your MOH, I don't see what there is to worry about or be disappointed about.
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    Ok well I guess I didn't explain completely so everyone would understand but I have been a friend to her, a GREAT one! I have NEVER been a bitch in anyway nor does she even know that I have any of these feeling or concerns because I know she's going through a lot!
    Never once did I say I should be the center of attention or that she should drop everything for me or anything like that.
    It is crazy for me to see some of your responses and makes me sick to see some of the things you girls are saying. I came on here thinking I would get some advice or support but instead get hurtful comments and criticism. I have never done anything like this and thanks to this, will never do it again.
    Thank you everyone, well not everyone because it seems like there's only one girl who understands.
    Untitled TTC#1 - DX w/ Endo in 2004 - Married 5/21/11 - Stopped BC in 2/12 - Started TTC 6/12
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    [QUOTE]Ok well I guess I didn't explain completely so everyone would understand but I have been a friend to her, a GREAT one! I have NEVER been a bitch in anyway nor does she even know that I have any of these feeling or concerns because I know she's going through a lot! Never once did I say I should be the center of attention or that she should drop everything for me or anything like that. It is crazy for me to see some of your responses and makes me sick to see some of the things you girls are saying. I came on here thinking I would get some advice or support but instead get hurtful comments and criticism. I have never done anything like this and thanks to this, will never do it again. Thank you everyone, well not everyone because it seems like there's only one girl who understands.
    Posted by lillolo[/QUOTE]
    Okay, bye!
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    Huh, maybe it's my age , but these are some of the snarkiest comments I have seen. Kathryn especially seems like someone I would NOT be proud to have as a daughter.  If you all are on here to chat with friends or make fun of brides who need help, you should make that clear.  You should not present yourselves as people who want to help others.

    This girl asked for advice.  I get the impression she has no knowledge of Bachelorette parties, MOH or any of the basic wedding issues.  Could someone maybe give her some help without judging her? 

    Some of you seem outraged that she has had the nerve to discuss her wedding with her MOH because she has "relationship problems", well  stop the world, cancel the wedding because obviously the MOH is the priority. If her MOH was too busy for the job, she could have said so.  I don't know who old this bride is, but I think she could use some information so I will post a link to what her MOH should be doing.
     If you all want to act like Miss Manners, you can also check this site for what a MOH should be doing.  You people need to get a grip.  People come on this site for help, it might be nice for you to do so.
    http://www.ehow.com/how_5418961_wedding-responsibilities-maid-honor.html
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:75ca797a-c8bc-494a-8e0e-2cf9302e5341">Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE]Huh, maybe it's my age , but these are some of the snarkiest comments I have seen. Kathryn especially seems like someone I would NOT be proud to have as a daughter.  If you all are on here to chat with friends or make fun of brides who need help, you should make that clear.  You should not present yourselves as people who want to help others. This girl asked for advice.  I get the impression she has no knowledge of Bachelorette parties, MOH or any of the basic wedding issues.  Could someone maybe give her some help without judging her?  Some of you seem outraged that she has had the nerve to discuss her wedding with her MOH because she has "relationship problems", well  stop the world, cancel the wedding because obviously the MOH is the priority. If her MOH was too busy for the job, she could have said so.  I don't know who old this bride is, but I think she could use some information so I will post a link to what her MOH should be doing.  If you all want to act like Miss Manners, you can also check this site for what a MOH should be doing.  You people need to get a grip.  People come on this site for help, it might be nice for you to do so. <a href="http://www.ehow.com/how_5418961_wedding-responsibilities-maid-honor.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.ehow.com/how_5418961_wedding-responsibilities-maid-honor.html</a>
    Posted by MamaSally[/QUOTE]

    What kind of "friend" would say something like, "Wow, you have relationship troubles, that's terrible. So, hey, let's talk about my wedding!"?

    I don't know how old you are, but you ought to be old enough to have basic manners and respect for a friend.

    And that list of duties is total bullshit. Only a narcissistic priick of a person would  hold one of her dearest friends responsible for such crappy jobs and tasks, and have the nerve to tell someone she should be doing this job for her on her wedding day.

    A girl's wedding doesn't make her a princess or give her the right to treat her friends like garbage, which is exactly what lists like this imply. That the bride somehow "deserves" special treatment and "deserves" the right to expect her friends to fulfill a bunch of shiit jobs for her.

    Really. If you're going to lecture people on manners and common decency, then learn how to treat your own friends properly before you go around scolding strangers for bluntly telling a bride that she ought to be nicer to her own friends.
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    Ah Jersey, well that explains alot. 
    If you think the list of MOH responsibilities is such "bullshit" (your word) perhaps you need to start your own list of MOH duties and post it on the net. You could become the next Miss Manners!  Because it seems like you know everything.

    The girl stated that she and her friend have been close for 17 years.  If they have been friends for 17 years, something must be working with their friendship.

    I personally have a problem with people thinking a bride doesn't deserve supportive friends. Not slaves, just supportive friends. My complaint was about the MOH's attitude.  Does the bride really have to pretend she's not getting married, never mention it?  I know, maybe if they wait until a couple of weeks before the wedding, the MOH might be in the mood to pick out a dress. She accepted this position, there are things that have to be addressed.  I take the total opposite view of this situation,  the MOH needs to suck it up and even if she can't work up the energy to do anything to help plan with her friend, she should at least allow her friend be happy.  What the heck is she supposed to do?  Oh, I know see below:

    "Dear Family and Friends,  I'm sorry, please disregard the save the date notifications.  We have to postpone the wedding.  My Maid of Honor wants to get married and her boyfriend doesn't.  Until they get this relationship thing straightened out I need to support her and  I don't want to put her through the horror of picking out her dress or standing next to me at my wedding.  Until  they decide what they are going to do, I am putting my wedding on hold,  because that's what good friends do.

    Whatever.

    I don't know why I am arguing with someone who has posted over 12,000 times in 18 months.  That's what?  22 posts a day?  Wow, get a life.


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    edited September 2010
    Excuse me? Because she said she doesn't like how it is around here, and so she's leaving, and I said bye?

    Don't get me wrong: I don't actually care what you think of me, and whether or not you'd be "proud" to have me as a daughter means absolutely nothing to me; I just don't know where you're getting this from what I've said.

    Come to think of it, I don't actually care about that, either....
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    MamaSally, you seem to post on the boards when you want to disagree with the majority of the advice given and you have about 10 posts.  Is there a reason you find it OK to crticize others for crtitcizing?

    PPs are correct.  There are no "duties" that a MOH has.  A MOH should be doing these things because she wants to - and not because a list or a person told her she has to.  Think of all the things you've done.  When prodded, did it feel better to do something or was it much better to know that you did a nice thing out of your own volition?

    OP, if you come back I think you need to realize that
    1) Bachelor/bachlorette parties are gifts to you and your FI.  So to mention to someone how you want a gift party planned for you is not appropriate and quite rude.  Instead, accept the party that your friends can throw.

    2) If your friend is a full time student then please be respectful of that timing.  Right now that is going to take a huge chunk of her life right now.  One of my dear friends is in grad school and I know that when we chat, it's on her time because despite the time crunch I have being pregnant and working, I know that she has less free time than me.

    So for now, just talk to her about HER.  And then send her an email or two asking when she'd like to go shopping - maybe over Thanksgiving weekend for dresses or Columbus Day if that's free for her.  But with your wedding not until May, there's really quite little for a MOH to do at this point.

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    Mod-Since when does the number of posts have anything to do with your blog content?
    This is one of the problems with the Internet/blogs.  It is very difficult to make a point and exhibit the emotion that went with it.  Go ahead and look up my few posts.  Not all are negative, that is your perception.  The majority from others (especially on this thread) are, and it triggers my urge to "stick up" for those just posting for advise.  Thus, my sarcastic posts on this thread.

    "Is there a reason you find it OK to criticize others for criticizing"?  Why yes I do have a reason.Why do people have to criticize in the first place?  Can't they just advise?
    I don't think it's necessary to use bad language.  I don't think it's necessary to judge the OP by calling them names, implying that they are a bad person, or saying "okay, bye" when they feel they got no help and are afraid to post again..  I especially don't think people should read the OP and reply with an unhelpful, mean reply.  If you don't have anything helpful, don't reply.  But some seem to have taken the opportunity to tell her how wrong and thoughtless she is, instead of directing her to an etiquette site that could be helpful to her.

    If The Knot wants their wedding blogs to be taken seriously and used and an important wedding tool, someone needs to step up and make sure replies are constructive and considerate.

    Additionally, I feel that alot of the advise was incorrect.  Which really is not that big of a deal, except that many are using incorrect advise as an excuse to rip on the OP for thinking her MOH is there to assist her with decisions (on dressed, etc).  I posted a link to recommend ways MOH can help a bride (if she wants to) and even that got ridiculed.  If people want to post thousands of times and chat with friends that's great, but go to another thread and leave people who need advise alone.

    If this is how The Knot wants to run their blog, fine.  It is more of a social outlet for people with nothing to do, than for any kind of advise. 
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    THIS.  IS.  NOT.  A.  BLOG.  Until you can figure out what this site actually is, you're probably better off not posting here.  Or anywhere else on the internet.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    Blog = internet diary.

    Knot ≠ blog.

    Glad we cleared that up.
    Courtesy of megk8oz
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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    edited September 2010
    [QUOTE]Kathryn-You can try to cover your snarky comment, but it's intent was obvious. Jersey chick, The Knot actually has a list of things a MOH can do to take some of the stress off the bride. Agree or not, it's been done for years. I have learned that there is actually more info on The Knot home site than on the blogs.  The blogs are merely people's opinions and not always correct etiquette.
    Posted by MamaSally[/QUOTE]
    Who's covering anything?

    I'm actually really nice. When people aren't whining that their MOHs aren't "doing enough" or are "interested enough" in spending hours upon hours talking about the wedding and dress shopping and party organizing and invitation stuffing and doesn't want to do a bach party in Vegas and needs time for studies.

    And yes, there is a list of things the MOH <strong>CAN</strong> do. CAN. Not required. You seem to misunderstand where the disagreement is.
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    Girl with the bonnet- Really?  All you can come up with is my incorrect nomenclature?  I will say in the most respectful and kind way.  DON'T. READ. MY. POSTS.  It will save you alot of anxiety as I am opinionated, but not obscene nor usually rude.  I am not afraid to defend someone who seems to be unfairly attacked. And, I'll be around, usually lurking, occasionally posting.

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    ManwaithielManwaithiel member
    First Comment
    edited September 2010
    Kathryn, you can be my daugther since Mama is disowning you so severly. Mostly because you spell your name the right way (the way I spell mine ^.^)

    Mama, you clearly have no children of your own and they're obviously not in college or you would understand the issue. This girl got upset because her friend say "I'm going to school, don't expect to hear from me for a few months," which can totally happen. Heck, I don't even warn my own friends about this so props to the OP's friend for thinking of it.

    It's totally rude for the OP to ask for a bachelorette party. If a bride asked me for one (especially something extravagant like Vegas) I would just not throw her one. People who expect gifts should not recieve them in my opinion.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:23375520-b7cc-42ed-9a7c-58a891ebb8d3">Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ah Jersey, well that explains alot. 
    Posted by MamaSally[/QUOTE]

    I'm glad you're reduced to using stereotypes to make a point. Good work.

    My roommate's from Jersey and she's one of the sweetest girls ever, but I'm sure she would kick your butt for what you're saying on here.
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    [QUOTE]Kathryn, you can be my daugther since Mama is disowning you so severly. Mostly because you spell your name the right way (the way I spell mine ^.^)
    Posted by Manwaithiel[/QUOTE]
    big <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-kiss.gif" border="0" alt="Kiss" title="Kiss" />

    I'd bet that you also get "Kathyrn" from others as well?
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:0880ce34-471f-4cb1-9425-d3a1f9085b52">Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE]big I'd bet that you also get "Kathyrn" from others as well?
    Posted by kathrynhabibti[/QUOTE]

    I haven't gotten that one. Usually people just assume it's Katherine. I hate that spelling (no offense to those who spell it that way) but I prefer mine so much more.
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    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP : I haven't gotten that one. Usually people just assume it's Katherine. I hate that spelling (no offense to those who spell it that way) but I prefer mine so much more.
    Posted by Manwaithiel[/QUOTE]
    omg, how on earth could I have forgotten that. I get that all the time. Yeah, I definitely prefer mine and I do feel like I pronounce it exactly as it's spelled: "Kath. Ryn."

    But I think you go by Kate, right? So I should just stick with that? (I'm also super picky about finding out if people go by their full name or a diminutive - because I don't, but people automatically do it for me. Nothing wrong with dimins of course but I've just never gone by one.)
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    Yeah, I go by Kate. I don't mind Kathryn, but I might confuse you for my parents calling me when I'm in trouble if you call me that =P.

    I HATE Katie. Hate. I have one relative who is allowed to call me that. Everyone else knows better.
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    [QUOTE]Yeah, I go by Kate. I don't mind Kathryn, but I might confuse you for my parents calling me when I'm in trouble if you call me that =P. I HATE Katie. Hate. I have one relative who is allowed to call me that. Everyone else knows better.
    Posted by Manwaithiel[/QUOTE]
    Hehehe. Noted!
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:e1687591-73eb-4b87-a130-46676a604202">Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hehehe. Noted!
    Posted by kathrynhabibti[/QUOTE]

    I like you. Let's be friends.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:372cf0b0-c4de-4cd0-8787-91f5681b70f6">Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE]Mama, you clearly have no children of your own and they're obviously not in college or you would understand the issue. This girl got upset because her friend say "I'm going to school, don't expect to hear from me for a few months," which can totally happen. 
    Posted by Manwaithiel[/QUOTE]
    That was me my first year of law school.  I asked my friends to be BMs over the summer then they didn't hear from me again until Christmas.  My parents would call DH to make sure I was still alive ;)
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worried-mohhelp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:84490141-b598-46c1-a288-e062606080b8Post:0e47f085-3afe-4358-a456-72ade08960e6">Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Worried about my MOH...HELP : That was me my first year of law school.  I asked my friends to be BMs over the summer then they didn't hear from me again until Christmas.  My parents would call DH to make sure I was still alive ;)
    Posted by bablingbrooke[/QUOTE]

    Nice. My parents are just accustomed to me being really good and calling every day for two weeks and then suddenly dropping off the face of the earth for 3 weeks. I send a text every once in awhile so they don't sell off my stuff =D
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