Wedding Party

Re: delete

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    Just leave it alone, and let her enjoy herself as a guest. Giving someone duties or a job is not honoring them, it's putting them to work.

    Also, if you have to ask what her duties as a hostess should be, then that suggests that hostesses aren't common in your circle. Therefore, you might risk offending her by giving her a job, if Hostess is not a familiar and accepted role in your circle.

    How small is your wedding party? Will adding one more person as a bridesmaid really hurt? You don't need to round up another groomsman to even things out, you know. If you want to keep things small then just have her as a guest, but it sounds like you'd really want her as a bridesmaid so I don't get why just one more person would make a difference.

    Or ask her to do a reading.
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    edited August 2010
    What the heck is a hostess? Either she is in the wedding party as a bridesmaid or she isn't. If by hostess you mean "personal attendant" than that is a BS job. It is demeaning and says "you aren't good enough to be in the wedding but you are good enough to be my maid for the day." If you want a 'hostess' than pay one since it isn't a honor but a job.

    If you consider a hostess part of the wedding party, how does it make it smaller to have her as a hostess rather than BM? You should still be getting her a gift so you aren't saving money? I don't understand the logic here. Personally, I would decline your 'honor.'
    Anniversary
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_hostess-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:9b7faeda-2240-424b-9e3b-9d453bd70ce5Post:2383aad7-c225-45c7-bc0d-802f058c62e4">Hostess help</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have a friend that I would really like be in my wedding but we have decided to keep the wedding party small.  She is also planning a wedding a few months after mine.  We only have one usher and right now there are over 150 people on the guest list (I am assuming that not all of them will attend the ceremony).   I thought about asking her to be a hostess.  If she was a hostess then it woud save her money due to not having to buy a dress and I would get to have her in my wedding party.  Is it ok to ask her to be a hostess or should I just leave it alone??  And if she is the hostess what should her duties be?
    Posted by danabodbyl[/QUOTE]

    What exactly does a hostess do? I've been in multiple weddings (including my own, ha) and I've never seen a hostess...

    If you want her to be in your wedding party, why don't you just ask her to be a BM? Sides don't need to match and your FI will NOT need to go find one more guy to ask if you ask her to stand up for you.
    The Bump ate my signature. DD - Apr 2011 DS - expected June 2013
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    Leave it as is. Not everybody needs to be in the wedding. Being a guest is honor enough.
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