Wedding Party
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Too many little ones!

I have 6 little girls and 2 boys that I need to 'put to work' in my wedding. Currently, I have the oldest girl (10 years old) as a junior bridesmaid, 8 year twins as candle lighters and two 6 year olds as flower girls. I need a role for another 6 year old girl??? The boys are 11 and 8 - can they both be ring bearers? If I make them ushers, do they need tuxes? Seems to me they may be too young to be ushers...

Help, I have too mnay little ones! A true blessing in each of them though!

Re: Too many little ones!

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    YOu don't need to put anyone to work. You can have another flower girl or as many ring bearers as you want. THe 11 year old can be an usher. Whether or not they wear tuxes is up to your FI. I have seen it both ways.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_many-little-ones?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:c7f37c25-df8a-4dd8-8070-14546f3a6fa8Post:36bc981c-71ca-4ca4-b91c-9dbbf9d0add6">Too many little ones!</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>I have 6 little girls and 2 boys that I need to 'put to work' in my wedding.</strong> Currently, I have the oldest girl (10 years old) as a junior bridesmaid, 8 year twins as candle lighters and two 6 year olds as flower girls. I need a role for another 6 year old girl??? The boys are 11 and 8 - can they both be ring bearers? If I make them ushers, do they need tuxes? Seems to me they may be too young to be ushers... Help, I have too mnay little ones! A true blessing in each of them though!
    Posted by bnewry[/QUOTE]

    Why?

    What would happen if you didn't find "jobs" for them to do?
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    OP, I agree that you don't need to find work for them. If you can't find "jobs" for them all, don't worry about it. Take a special picture with them on your wedding day and leave it at that. Not everyone has to be in the wedding party.
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    Don't "put them to work" just for the sake of it. They can give out programs if you don't like the usher thing. Read Sarah above.  
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    mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    Ditto PPs ... this is a LOT of kids. If you haven't already asked them to be in the wedding yet, I personally would not ask ANY of them. That sounds like a giant headache waiting to happen. Eight kids in a 30-second role for a one-day even just sounds like my idea of torture.  

    If you've already asked them, though ... then I'd personally just have three flower girls and two ring bearers, and leave the others in the roles you asked them to do. (I would also not call anyone a "junior bridesmaid" because she's doing the exact same thing as the adult bridesmaids.)
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    Are all of these your children?  Did someone promise them they would be part of your wedding and now you have to go through with it?  Kids have no idea they can be included until someone opens their mouth about it.  IMO, when there are several children involved, it becomes more of a 'play' for them to be part of than a special experience for them and the couple being married.

    To answer your question, I think the boys should be ushers if you feel the need for them to be involved. They are too old for RB.  They do not have to wear a tux, they can wear nice dress pants and a long sleeve shirt.
    dont make ur password so easy. gbck2CA2 hahahaha
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    4 of the girls are my fiances daughters whom he has full custody of so I will include them regardless, one of the girls is my neice and another is my friends daughter. The two boys are the same friends' son.

    I guess my post wasn't so much about whether or not I should include them but more along the lines of what roles can I include them in.
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    bbyckesbbyckes member
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    I think it's special that you have so many "blessings" in your wedding, but seriously, there's only so many "jobs" available.  Shuffle some of the "jobs" around as suggested in previous posts.  Good luck.
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    I went to a wedding where they had two girls and two boys (around 9-10) giving out programs. They sat down during the ceremony and it wasn't a huge job that must be done in a certain way. They also didn't have to buy or rent special outfits. They just wore something with similar wedding colors.
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    mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker

    In that case, I think I'd have your FI's children in the actual wedding party (bridesmaid, flower girl, ring bearer), and then give the smaller roles (candle lighter, program person) to the other kids.


    Actually, if it were me, I think I'd only have FI's kids in the wedding and not have the rest. Or include the niece but not the friend's kids ... I think they'd understand if it were family-only. But if it's non-negotiable to have ALL these kids in the wedding, then I'd put your own kids in the "more important" roles and have the other kids in the "minor" rules.

    I would not ask a parent to buy a specific outfit for the kids unless they are bridesmaids, groomsmen, ring bearers or flower girls. Any other role, I'd just ask that they put them in a nice outfit of their choice. MAYBE give a loose color scheme, or ask that they wear plain outfits and you will buy them colored neckties or sashes to help them coordinate.

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    efujanefujan member
    First Comment
    Agree with PP!

    If you "need" duties for them, I would suggest they hand out programs, help with the guest book, and maybe take gifts as people arrive and place them in the coat room/closet for safe-keeping.  (gift attendants - I was one when I was little because there were a million cousins under 10!!)  We weren't required to have certain dresses or anything, but we all got corsages, which made us feel SO special!!! 

    11 is too young to be an usher, IMHO.  Are you having an aisle runner?  They could do that . . .
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    dparisidparisi member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    No No= no aisle runner- I've seen grown men struggle with this!!  LOL
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    Thank you to the last few postings! Great help!
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    trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited May 2010
    Actually, all the postings were helpful, not just the last few.  You might not have agreed with them because of your personal family dynamic, but another b2b coming here might find the first several posts very helpful.

    Anyway:  If you feel that you MUST have all the children in the wedding, have a bunch of FGs and two RBs.  The RBs shouldn't have to rent a tux at all, and rarely do they carry the real rings.  Those are safely in the hands of the MOH and/or BM. 

    The RBs are really only there for the cute factor.  Same with FGs.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    If you are having the 10 year old girl be a junior bridesmaid, can the 11 year old boy be a junior groomsman?  I kind of feel like 11 is old for a ringbearer-most 11 yr old boys I know would think it was kind of babyish...and maybe this is nontraditional, but could the 8 yr old boy AND the 6 yr old girl both be ring bearers? He could carry the bride's ring for the groom and stand on the groom's side, and she can carry the groom's ring for the bride and stand on the bride's side?  Or, maybe the little girl can accompany the ringbearer up the aisle, and stand by the MOH, ready to hold the bride's bouquet when the ring exchange is taking place (rather than the MOH doing it)-especially if this is one of FI's daughter's...??

    Just some thoughts...
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