Bridesmaids

carla072600

I just got engaged & I have so many questions.  First, is it rude if I don't include my future sister in law (my fiance's sister) as one of my bridesmaids if her husband is the best man?  Second, I'm having trouble choosing my maid of honor between my sister & best friend.  I'm leaning more towards my best friend but I'm feeling guilty that my sister will feel hurt. Please if anyone has advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.

bablingbrooke

1.  If it would cause family drama to not include her, include her.

2.  If you can't choose between them, have co-MOH or no MOH.

gottahavashorti

You don't have to ask her to be a BM, but sometimes it's easiest to include all siblings in the WP.  Keep in mind that your FI can also ask her to be a groomswoman and she can wear the bridesmaid dress, a black dress, slacks and blouse, or black suit and stand on his side.

Have co-Maids of Honor since you weren't able to choose one right off the bat.

trix1223

Ditto pps.  Measure short term vs. long term.  Will you hear about not asking your FSIL at every Thanksgiving dinner, Christmas dinner, and summer BBQ for the next 10 years or more?  Then ask her.  Sometimes it's just easier to bite the bullet to avoid potential drama.

Have co-MOH:  one stands closest to you and holds flowers during the ceremony, and the other signs the license and/or gives a toast.

mbcdefg

If you JUST got engaged, then you don't need to ask your bridesmaids yet. I'd wait until you get a ceremony and reception site (and therefore a wedding date) set in stone before you select a wedding party. Then ask them around 10 months before that date.

No, it's not wrong to avoid asking someone whose spouse is in the wedding. Spouses are not owed a spot. Your bridesmaids should be your close friends.

However, if it'd cause family drama if you don't ask her, then I'd think hard about it. If you would avoid drama by asking, it may be best to just ask.

Choose your closest friend as MOH. If you are equally close to them both, have two Maids of Honor.

banana468

Give it some time to figure out the WP.

If you think it'll create grief, ask her to be a BM.  OR, your FI can ask her to be on his side.  If those options dont' work, what about asking her to do a reading?

As for the MOH issue, it's also fine to have two MsOH.

MyWedding13

For MOH, I was in your same situation. So, I have two MOH's!!!! Do you get along with your future sister in law? If you do, I would say put her in the party. I think you might offend people if she is not in it. What does your fiance have to say about this?

carla072600

Great IDEAS !!!  Thank you all