MOH question!!

usmcwife11 · October 2010

If you never talk to the person that is supposed to be your MOH, and she tries to tell you how to do your wedding(what colors, type of dress, what the party should wear) how would you tell them that you don't want them to be your MOH?

stina93446 · October 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:e444fb37-99bc-40ae-b464-1c642ee6ea2ePost:395f95e9-cb27-4d89-8fb3-e826e406a076">MOH question!!</a>:
[QUOTE]If you never talk to the person that is supposed to be your MOH, and she tries to tell you how to do your wedding(what colors, type of dress, what the party should wear) how would you tell them that you don't want them to be your MOH?
Posted by usmcwife11[/QUOTE]

<div>Someone is only your MOH if you asked them. Did you ask her? If you DID ask her, you're stuck with her unless you want to end your friendship. If she's giving you advice that you don't want, just tell her "Oh that's a great idea....thanks for that." but kicking her out for trying to give you ideas is pretty crappy. Also, if you never talk to her, why not YOU call her and see what's up. Is this like her normal behavior?</div>

mbcdefg · October 2010

Her offering your ideas on how to plan your wedding is not a reason to kick her out. If she offers unwanted advice, you either say, "Thanks, I'll consider those ideas!" or "We already have that part planned, but thanks for your input," and do what you wanted anyway; or just stop talking about your wedding plans around her so she can't comment on them. Talk about, you know, regular stuff.

Also, if you "never talk to her," how is she giving you all these ideas then? You're not talking to her, but she's supposedly bothering you with all these suggestions? I don't get it. You've entered some kind of paradox here.

Anyway, if you want to end the friendship on a sour note, by all means say to her, "I'm tired of you giving me ideas on my wedding. You're only supposed to agree with the ideas and opinions that I like and that I give to you. Therefore, I'm booting you from my wedding."

However, if you want to remain friendly with her, then follow the suggestions in paragraph 1. It'd be really, REALLY stupid to throw away a friendship just because your friend has *gasp* an opinion. UNless she's literally holding a gun to your head, she can't force you into any decisions that you don't like.

Part of planning a wedding is having to deal with unwanted advice and suggestions from just about everyone you'll come into contact with. If you get all huffy about it and don't learn to ignore it and just start booting people from your wedding (and therefore your life), you'll have zero friends and family left by the wedding day.

usmcwife11 · October 2010

Well the last time that i did talk to her was almost two months ago and that is when she told me her opinion and i did appreciate that but whenever I started to talk she just talked over me, and when she was done talking she hung up on me. She is my bestfriend and i don't want to lose a friendship that i've had for 7 years, but i didn't ask her to be my MOH she just put herself as my MOH. And I have tried calling texting and messaging her but she won't answer anything.

tldh · October 2010

If you didn't ask her, then she's not your MOH.

aerinpegadrak · October 2010

If you didn't do anything to disabuse her of the notion that she was MOH, then you'll look like just as big a tool for booting her as you would if you had asked her.