Wedding Party

Slightly off topic and long- but need opinions

I couldn't find the appropriate board to put this on and this one always offers up the best (read: blatently honest) advice, so I figure I'll start here.  I would also like to prefice that I know this is VERY early, but my job allows buckets of free time this time of year and I will be working like a dog within the next couple of weeks right up until the wedding so I like to get as much thinking/brainstorming/planning done as possible.  Okay, that being said...

I recently posted a topic about my BF/newly pregnant bridesmaid.  We were chatting last night and I was telling her about the weekend we are planning on coming home for our bridal shower (which my sis/MOH has already offered to throw).  My FI and I live in NC and most friends and family live in IN, where the wedding will take place, so advanced notice is always necessary.  It's also the weekend of his gmas 90th bday party.  So, she's getting excited about her pregnancy and has already thought about her baby shower and we thought it would be fun to have the parties thrown on the same weekend.  We aren't being presumptuous.  We know our friends and family will be doing this.  So because of all of our mutual friends, is this going to be super annoying for them?  Saturday they would go to my shower, go out for my bachelorette party, then go to her shower the next day.  That sounds like a lot of money spent.  We have good reasons other than "fun".  One, I would be able to attend her shower because I would be in town.  Two, it's an appropriate time (about one month out from our big days) so it kind of just makes sense to work around each other. 

I did have a solution that my mom did NOT agree with.  I thought it would be fun to just have a co-ed "mixer" rather than a bridal shower.  No obligation for gifts.  My reasons being that while we could use the gifts, we will have to pay to ship everything back to NC.  And people will more than likely give a wedding gift so it's not like we'll be devestated if we don't get MORE gifts.  Two, we don't get to see everyone all the time so it'll be nice to get everyone together and go co-ed.  My mom thinks it's silly because the point of the shower is to shower the honoree with gifts and it will be wasteful to gather everyone together and ask for their Saturday afternoon just to "hang out".  Hmmmm... kinda see her point but I'm not making anyone go.  If I were invited, I would think it was a relief!

Please feel free to comment on anything or everything I've said here.  Oh, and side note, my sis is super laid back and won't care if I make decisions regarding her party she's throwing me.  There are no real formalities that we follow with each other.  I'm lucky :)
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