Wedding Party

Alternatives to head table

Hello,

I am getting married in May and I was wondering if you girls had any ideas about alternatives to a traditional head table. I don't want to do a sweetheart table, but I don't want to do a traditional head table because I don't want to seat my WP away from their significant others. I thought about seating their SOs up with us, but we have 5 attendants on either side, and a lot of them will be bringing dates. I was thinking about doing a head table with immediate family only (2 sets of parents, 3 siblings, my sister's husband and 6 y/o son). Would that work? Where should I seat the WP?

Re: Alternatives to head table

  • I think the family table is a great idea.  You can either seat the WP as you would have if they weren't members of the WP or you could sit them at 1 or 2 tables near the family table.
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  • I think both you and PP have the right idea.
  • I think a family table is a great idea.  Or you could have a table with the MOH and BM and their SOs and put the rest of the WP at a nearby table.
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  • We did something similar. We had a "siblings head table." All our siblings sat at the table with their dates and we had our parents at their own tables with their friends. The rest of the WP was seated with other guests that they knew and liked. 
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  • I'm having my MOH's guest, brother's girlfriend, and best man's wife sitting with s, so they won't be forced to sit alone. But, you have more people than me so that could be a problem. A friend of mine had just a table for her and her new husband, and the wedding party sat at their own table.

    Also, I'm doing a reserved table for immediate family, everyone else sits wherever they want. The reason for that is at my cousin's wedding, the family put their plates down on the table and jackets on the chairs next to the bride and groom's table, then when they went to get drinks the couple's friends actually moved my family's stuff to another table! Unreal how rude that was, to jsut move the family's stuff so you can sit next to the bride and groom (they even moved ny uncle's stuff, who was the father of the bride).

    if that happened at my wedding, my mom would have no problem putting them in their place!
  • Play with different ideas and see what works best.  People have given you lots of ideas that worked for them, you now have to figure out what works for you.

    FWIW, at my daughter's wedding, she and her husband sat at a table with the MOH and her FI, the BM who was single, and the single (dateless) members of the wedding party.  All other wedding party members sat with their spouse/date at a table with other people they knew.

    Each set of parents hosted their own table.
  • HuskerfanzHuskerfanz member
    100 Comments
    edited February 2010
    We did a mix of a WP w dates head table and sweetheart table that worked out really well.  We had 6 BM/GM and 3 non-WP dates.

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  • You could also do your BM and MOH and their dates with you at a table, and then have 1 or 2 tables nearby where you seat the rest of the WP with their dates. I like your idea about a family table as well. I'd then do one table nearby for BMs and 1 for GMs and their dates.
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  • I have  total 15 members in the WP, so I can't include all the SO's at one table. I'm thinking of having the smaller tables directly in front of the head table for the SO's so that they are nearest to their "people".
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  • I'm wondering, are you having rectangular or round tables? If you do round ones, it may be easier to have the sig. others with the WP and cluster the tables around the bride and groom with parents.
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  • So suzie, are the dates going to be shouting across to the other table?  If they're not close enough to talk to their dates, there's really no point.
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  • I don't understand the appeal of head tables.  You can't really talk with anyone except the people on each side of you.  The bride and groom aren't actually communicating with the WP, so why stick them there at all?

    And as MOB, I'm going to say that I would have abided a "family table" but I wouldn't have been happy.  I don't particularly care for my DD's in-laws.  We can be cordial when we're together, and I'd never, ever be rude to them.

    But I loved hosting my own table with OUR siblings and friends at it.  I much prefer that to sitting with my DD's new family which would have been a looooong evening, to say the least.

    The beauty of a sweetheart table is that the couple gets a precious couple minutes of private time.  The WP gets to sit with their SOs at a table with THEIR friends and family.  The parents get to host a table with THEIR friends and family.

    And the sweetheart table can be positioned so it's not front and center if couples are uncomfortable about being "on display". 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_alternatives-head-table?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:ff80b860-6dd4-4beb-a3ca-4d37ca88d7afPost:3ff94cf6-0420-488a-a076-0461217d49a1">Re: Alternatives to head table</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have  total 15 members in the WP, so I can't include all the SO's at one table. I'm thinking of having the smaller tables directly in front of the head table for the SO's so that they are nearest to their "people".
    Posted by suzie173[/QUOTE]

    PLEASE don't do that.

    Instead seat the WP WITH their signficant others.

    There are NO exceptions as to why this should not be done.
  • Last year my awesome soon-to-be mother-in-love married her longtime love, and they decided to sit at a small table, just the two of them, and seat everyone else at larger round tables regardless of whether or not people were in the wedding party. At first I thought it would be weird, but it was SO lovely...they were able to run around the room and talk to everyone, then got a chance to actually sit down, eat the meal they had planned and take a break from working the room. So often I look up to the head table at weddings and it's mostly empty most of the time because everyone is up and mingling. This is what my hubby and I plan to do at ours...

  • (didn't read everything)

    I like the "family table" idea!

    FI and I are having us, MOH, BM at our table (fortunately both single - as of now) - I wanted the full "head table" but our reception place has a stage for the head table (not movable, very obvious), and it's not long enough to fit us all....
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