WWYD: Peeps w/o SOs, asking for +1s

mgoss228

Since I sent out our invites last week (WOOT, WOOT!), I got my first text message from a guest asking if he could bring a guest or were "we trying to keep it small?" 

The guest list right now is about 115, so we aren't exactly trying to "keep it small," but if we gave everyone a +1 it would be too much.  Most of our guests have boy/girlfriends, FI(e)s, or DH/Ws, so their RSVP was for them and their SO.  And ALL of our single friends will know at least 5-10 others at our wedding (including our friend who texted me), so we decided to not extend a +1 to them.

My RSVPs have each guest's name typed out (took some time and was a PITA on my part) and then two boxes to choose from and check for Attending/Not Attending.... so the friend (and anyone else) knows they are the only invited person.

My question: 
What generic (and somewhat short)  phrase should I use to convey all the stuff I said above, w/o being rude?

TIA!

dreamwinds

"There are space limitations."

Or something I like less, cause I feel you're trying to defend your decision: "There are space limitations and we only extended plus ones to those we knew were in relationships."

I don't think you should feel like you need to explain your decision and if they push and say: well, one more won't hurt, you can then explain further and point that that it wouldn't be fair to allow them as a single person to have a plus one without extending that privilege to all your other single friends.

nbrodie

I agree with PP.  You can also blame it on budget restrictions.  Although your wedding may not be THAT small in number, there's still a budget that we need to follow.

I wouldn't feel bad, it looks like you took everyone's feelings and concerns into cosideration by making sure that there will be enough people that they know there.  And you can tell him that as well.

jennlin

FIRE CODE. people can't argue with that one.. would this be feasable for you? cause it wouldn't work if you were getting married outside..but this was a legitimate reason for me.....but we only had to deny one +1...we used this for acquaintances that thought they were invited.

fancynewbecca

Annoying. We have super duper space limitations and had to cut out a lot of people. One of FI's friends asked to bring a +1... in addition to his girlfriend. So, +2, technically. I was like, "Uh, no." But FI had already said yes.

Thanks, buddy )

Anyway, I don't get how people don't undertsand invites. If I wanted you to bring extra people, I would have indicated that.

Wow, that just sounded really Bridezilla-ish of me.

fancynewbecca

Oh an I realize I didn't even answer your question! Hehe!

Yes, agree with dreamwinds )

kristend72

I wouldn't call it 'bridezillaish' I'd call it guestzillaish. If someone offers to take you out to dnner, do you ask if they'll buy for someone else, too? It just puts you into a cruddy position when you've already struggled with the choices.

As far as OP goes, I would just say that there are size limitations but you made sure that no one would be stuck there not knowing anyone and remind her of who will be there to party with. You don't need to give her a 'you'll see' but just rest knowing that one day she will understand.

Narginia

Just want to say thank you to the OP! I didn't even think about individually doing the RSVPS and we are doing the same thing. Only guests who are already in a relationship are getting the +1. We are at the max our budget and venue can take so this thread has been so helpful to me as well!