Two Ceremonies....

KoriA

Okay sooo... I'm catholic and my boyfriend is christian, we were thinking about doing two ceremonies, one small one for me so I can be married in the catholic church and one bigger one for his family and so we can have the outdoor wedding we want... what do you ladies think about this? Do you think that getting marriend the second time wont be as... fun or special? Do you think it would be better to have the smaller, catholic wedding first, or the big outdoor wedding first?
I am personally all for the big wedding first, but I would like to know what you girls think!! THANKS!


And for the poll, I was being weird and said the same thing twice for some reason... The third one is Big wedding first, small one second. Sorry!

Madisonpenny

Is he taking "catholic classes"? because if he isn't then you wont be able to get married in the catholic church.
I personally think that you should only do one ceremony, but thats my opinion, and this is your wedding, so i say do what you want.

l_everett

is the idea that everybody is attending both ceremonies? or will the smaller catholic ceremony be less ppl/more intimate? because then it becomes a matter of time if you want them done on the same day... I kinda think if you did the big ceremony first and then when you would cast everyone off while you do the pictures anyways you could have the catholic ceremony before you do pictures? i guess the location of the church and the outside ceremony would also have to be taken into account time wise... hmmm cause if time would be an issue then you could do the catholic ceremony earlier before if you're doing an afternoon outside ceremony. Because i mean you wouldn't want the time inbetween the big ceremony and the reception to be more than what like 3 hours?... I'm not catholic so i dont know but aren't those ceremonies a little longer? hehe too many questions lol

littlemoments324

I believe a girl I read on a different board was having the same situation.  Her IL's wanted the catholic wedding while she isn't catholic...so I think the end result was having the big wedding on Saturday and the small catholic wedding would be held on Sunday or it was held after the big ceremony on the Saturday...

Some catholic churches do not require classes for the one who isn't catholic.  I believe that the full mass is not done then.  I was at a wedding where the ceremony was located in a catholic church and together the priest and the lutheran pastor married the two.  I'm not sure how that would work...but it doesn't hurt to ask, especially if you both want to be married in each religion.

fancieface

I'm leaning towards having only one wedding. But if you really want two ceremonies then I would say small catholic ceremony first then the big outside wedding.

KoriA

Madisonpenny, yes,  he is going to take classes with me, and we already talked about what we would do if we had children... I mean in the sense of what religion or how we would bring them up.
l_everett, no, everyone will not attend both ceremonies. The reason we thought about doing two is because a lot of his family won't come if we do only the catholic one, and a lot of my family won't come if we only do the regular one. So the catholic one would be a small wedding with less people, but everybody would probably attend the 'big' wedding. We thought to do something like what little moments said, either do them one right after another, or do one the next day. The catholic wedding would not be as long as usual simply because hes not catholic, It would be a lot shorter because we wouldn't do all the usual catholic-y stuff.

One of the main resons I'm asking is because I'm not sure if getting married twice would take away the specialness or the 'magic' of it. And if so, I would want to have the big one to be more special because its the one we really want to have, the catholic wedding is more just for me so I can practice my faith.

robann527

I'd look into the two officiants thing (priest and pastor) as I see this a lot...that way you don't have to spend money on two places, two musicians, two sets of flowers, etc.