BMom - can you fix this sentence

MinM

It is grammatically incorrect...but I can't seem to fix it.

Students opposing views regarding Exhibit X may be attributable to apprehension to try the exhibit themselves, while the demonstration was enjoyable for them.

baconsmom

Well, it needs to be students', because the views belong to them.

Also, it seems awkward to me, but I can't decide if that's because it is awkward, or if I'm just unused to the style of writing. 

TheDuckis

Well it should be Students'.

But, when in doubt, I use shorter sentences. Many students found the demonstration enjoyable, but were apprehensive to try the exhibit themselves. We believe that the opposing reviews Exhibit X received could be attributable to [IDK, these competing experiences, or something].

baconsmom

Is the passive voice necessary? Could you maybe do:

One can attribute students' opposing views to apprehension about trying Exhibit X themselves, though many found the demonstration enjoyable. 

TheDuckis

Or would it be,

Exhibit X received mixed reviews from students, possibly because of the different ways it was presented. Those who witnessed the demonstration generally enjoyed it, while those left to try the exhibit themselves were more apprehensive.

MinM

One can attribute students' opposing views to apprehension about trying Exhibit X themselves, though many found the demonstration enjoyable.

WINNER WINNER, CHICKEN DINNER.

Dukis - all students saw the demonstration and were allowed to use it. Basically half liked it and half didn't. But it has been funded to be a permanent exhibit by my clients' funders, so I have qualify half of the students saying it was the least favorite thing with something nice.

DG1

Students' opposing views regarding Exhibit X may be attributable to their apprehension about trying the exhibit themselves, though many found the demonstration enjoyable.

MinM

Yes. Thank you. I have the ideas in my head but I can't make them come out correctly. Thanks, guys.