Wedding Woes
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So I have funeral stories.

My dad spoke then my sisters and I all spoke.
I kinda sucked but, eh, people cut you a lot of slack w/ your public speaking when your'e giving a tear-filled-euology.  

Buffy had to be removed immediately because she was being loud...so the Mr. had her in the lobby.  She FREAKED when momma's voice played through the speakers there.
She also knocked over a ginormous ugly lamp.  whoops.  And she kept stealing kleenex from boxes and giving them to people.  which was adorable but not good manners to steal all the kleenex

Aenyhoo, during my talking, I reached over and snagged a kleenex from the box near the podium.  5 minutes later, bigsis was speaking and reched to grab a kleenex and her speech was punctuated with "Oh snap *SNIIIIiiiiiiif*" because I took the last tissue--and Buffy had mre or less already emptied that box.  She says she's gonna hold that against me a while :-P

The cemetary was BITTERLY cold.  My great aunt successfully convinced her BIL that it would be illegal to keep his car running so the engine would stay warm during the ceremony.  Just to screw w/ him.  She's slightly evil and I adore her.

When they went to take the flag off the casket, they had to take off the giant rubber-band that they use to keep it from blowing all over.  The younger dude (fewer stripes, obviously lower ranking) slipped and snapped his officer in the face with the rubber band.  THe look he got was clearly "there will be death for you soon"  And all of us were desperately trying not to laugh.  which resulted in my sisters doing a 'gigglesnort'.  Which made me really laugh.  Wholly inappropriate, but it was funny.

The church made sure we had lots of good food and good people were helping show lots of support for my parents.

And someone asked my whoretastic cousin about her kids...the stunning silence (she has no contact or custod of any of her gazillion kids) was awesome.

Buffy and er wee cousins played and then we all got sick.
The end.

Re: So I have funeral stories.

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    "and then we all got sick" ends all your stories.  It might be time that you became the bubble dwelling family.

    I would have laughed at the rubber band snap, too.  Did gramps have a sense of humor?  Maybe he was laughing, too.
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    gramps would have found all of this hilarious.
    Including Buffy knocking over the lamp.

    Hell, BigSis's story included that if this funeral had been church, w/ her sitting next to gramps, he would have leaned over and pushed the 'light' button on his watch.  For two reasons, 1-this is  almost over, time for sunday dinner, yay! and 2-He really liked the blue light on his watch :-P

    (gramps was really ahrd to write/talk about because...well, he was a quiet, peaceful, happy presence.  He did everything for us but was the 'waiting in the wings' type.  I mean, he saw us popping wheelies over a tree-root and went and built us a ramp for us to use...but he basically watched us, saw what we needed, built it, put it in the driveway and said 'have fun'.  He wasn't 'front and center' in his own stories so much as he was thrilled to be a supporting character in all of urs)
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    Sounds like it went pretty well.  Sorry you're sick.
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