super sad.

ChanelShades

I'm sad. Yesterday a friend of mine found out he has cancer. I don't know what to say to him. My eyes tear up. Honestly, I don't know what is wrong with me. I am scared to call him and check on him because i am scared I will say or do the wrong thing. I just wonder should I be calling everyday or keeping it normal (and calling every week like I often do.) The doctors have given him a date that he won't live pass. He said he won't be around for my wedding. 

And I cried. Here he is fighting this ugly illness and his first words are T, I won't be able to make your wedding. It hurts. I am upset. Not because he can't make it. But because I am forced to ask--- why do bad things happen to such good people? He has the best soul....best heart....best smile. 

ChanelShades

sorry for the double post. my laptop said it didn't go through the first time.

DG1

See our "for the lurkers" sticky post above.  We all just lost a dear friend to stomach cancer.  I wish there were something worthwhile to say to you, but there really isn't.  Just let yourself be sad.  Call your friend. ask him what he wants from you - lots of contact, no contact, cards, whatever. Expect his needs to change as he goes through this.

And don't bet on the date.  It could be right on. Or it could be way off. Some people die sooner, some later.  GMIL was given 6 weeks to live - 2.5 years ago. She's still kicking.

Sorry this is happening to you. It really sucks.

TheDuckis

I'm so, so, sorry. I wish there was more I could say.

6fsn

I'm very sorry.  It's okay to be sad and most people don't know what to say or do.  Follow his lead and your heart.

mrsconn23

I'm so very sorry.  The other's have given great advice.

kimp67

I'm sorry.  As for your question, you need to call him.  I don't think you could say/do the wrong thing.  Just let him know that you're there for him.

Butter Cookie

I'm sorry you and your friend are going through this. I am I suppose not at a point where I can go in depth about this kind of illness without choking back tears, but I'll tell you when Dad found out he had cancer (which wasn't terminal, but still scary) he wanted to be surrounded by as many friends and family as possible. Ww wanted to just have the closest people to her around her - so ask him. Talk to him. Send him stupid things that will make him laugh.

mermaidutp

So sorry about your friend.  The best thing you can do is continue to be a good friend.  Maybe start calling twice a week instead of once a week - just make sure that your friend knows that you're there for support, if he needs a good laugh, or whatever.  It might sound trite - but try to stay positive and focus on the time that your friend has left.  Any of us could die tomorrow, it's what we do with the time we have now that counts.