Anti Bride regrets

kcgrl

Has anyone else out there followed their heart and skipped out on the "show" of a wedding and reception? How do you feel about it now? 

Unlike many - many - many brides I know, I did not and do not believe in the meanings behind the traditional weddings - I hated the idea of throwing thousands of dollars on decorations - cakes - favors - flowers - a dress that I would only wear once and well - the whole darn thing. But here I sit after seeing another beautiful wedding go by thinking to myself - I missed out  - all because I was too stubborn to do it the way everyone else does it. 

The thing I regret the most are the pictures. Having my hair and makeup done - looking gorgeous beside my husband - and I feel like I can't do that now because I didn't have a wedding. Or is ok? I haven't done anything normal yet so should I just go take the photos I want for my personal scrapbook or is that totally taboo since I skipped everything traditional?

[Deleted User]

It's totally fine to do a photo session with the dress. It's more relaxed and you'll have a fun time with your groom. You could even do a Trash the Dress Session. You can do your hair and makeup, wear the dress, and do things you wouldn't typically have done on the bid day. Ex: laying on the ground, jumping in a pool, the possibilities are endless!

CAB1217

You could always do a vow renewal...

dragonwagon

I was offered a large, (*gulp*) LARGE amount of money if I had a very small simple wedding to put towards married life. I turned it down because I can make that amount of money in my lifetime. You really only get one wedding day, and the fear that it would haunt me for the rest of my life was more blinding that the dollar signs.

You really should do a photo session though, it would give you some great memories to cherish through the years and help get rid of the regret.

CAB1217

Dragon, I want to steal your siggy. But, I won't. LOL

dragonwagon

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_anti-bride-regrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:1b51617d-685c-4b9b-b211-bab374896338Post:f5479507-caa6-4163-a817-64a187ec9cb5">Re: Anti Bride regrets</a>:
[QUOTE]Dragon, I want to steal your siggy. But, I won't. LOL
Posted by CAB1217[/QUOTE]

Oh there are plenty more to choose from on the Kate Middleton FTW website. They all make me giggle.

CAB1217

I imagine her saying it like "hurrr" instead of hair. And that makes me happy. Must check out this site.

sandymbme

I have kind of a unique perspective, having been divorced (gulp!) twice! Having weddings did not make either of my marriages successful, did not pay any bills, did not cause us to treat each other with care and respect. And those fancy wedding photos? Aside from the one displayed on the mantel over the fireplace, beyond showing off the albums a ton right after getting them, they collected dust from about one month after that until they were dumped in a box to go in storage, and have only been drug out once or twice EVER since then. So I don't think you are at all crazy, and in many ways I think you were very wise to treasure what REALLY matters (your relationship) and not get caught up in the drama and anxiety that is common with weddings.

That being said, I think there is no reason on earth why you can't throw a party to celebrate your love, and I see no reason at all why you can't book a session with you and your husband all prettied up, in a way that reflects you best. For instance, my FI and I decided we hate a lot of the typical engagement photo sessions and pics, so we are getting dressed up vintage style (probably either 20's or 40's style) and going with just a really fun look, and a session I got from a groupon from a photographer in the mall. We see no point in spending a fortune on a lot of things, which is why our wedding will be small scale, with great food and drink, and not a lot of frills, but will spend a year on premarital counseling with our pastor so THIS marriage will last a lifetime.

kcgrl

Thanks everyone. I have thought of doing a renewal of the vows in 5 years or so. You know - give it some time lol. 

We did have a celebration/reception a month after we were married. We just did not take any of the photo's that I wanted. 

Sandymbme - I think you're right. The majority of the photos and memories will be stored. I had that in mind as I started my scrapbook - something I could take out down the road and remember our journey - I have had a lot of fun piecing this scrapbook together. Thanks for the advice - I love your idea about the 20's/40's style photo session. I'll try to come up with something fun too for a photo session. Afterall - that too would be off the wall like everything else we did