Re: The custody post.

NOLABridesmaid

Does the kid always have to come to the wedding?

Do you side eye a couple if the kid from another relationship doesn't come or not in the wedding?

MinM

I don't think the kid ALWAYS has to come to the wedding, and that age probably factors into that A LOT. Like, if the kid is 21 and resents that his father is marrying someone his or her same age.

However, a lot of blended families make the wedding ceremony about THE FAMILY, not just the couple, especially when the children are younger. I've seen shows where a mom was marrying an upstanding dude, when the dad had runoft and left his kids. They did this whole things where upstanding dude gave the girls necklaces at the ceremony and at was really nice.

nicoleg1982

a lot of blended families make the wedding ceremony about THE FAMILY, not just the couple,

Both sets of my parents did this and it worked out well for everyone involved.  FWIW, I don't think my dad and smom were married on a day they usu. had custody.  My mom wasn't a total wench and let me go anyways.  I think people who quibble over such things don't deserve to have children int he first place.

6fsn

Yes, I think the minor children should be involved in the wedding since they will be involved in the marriage.

sas0402

I feel that if a bride or groom as a child depending on their age it would determine their title (ring barer, flower girl, junior brides maid, etc) but they should be in the wedding party. (so yes they should be at the wedding)

not to offend anyone... i forgot to make it clear that if the child doesnt feel comfortable they dont have to be in the wedding.  they should be in attendance though.

C&S1030

Yes, children should be there.  I'm trying not to push things though.  I don't want FI's DD to do anything she doesn't want to do.  i.e... being part of the wedding party. 

jojobrn

Absolutely, it's about a family coming together. My niece is over the moon to not only be getting a real, honest to god father figure in her life, but she gets to be the flower girl in her parents wedding.

MinM

zilla - I think that happened sometime in the mid-90s.

mrsconn23

I couldn't imagine the kiddo *NOT* being a part of our wedding.  I gave him a necklace with a pendant that had his name and our wedding date on it.  I feel like it was important to show that not only did DH and I get married, but we solidified our family that day.